Juvenile Myspace Drama Fiasco - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

LaDita · 12-17-2008, 12:03 AM

I don't really know where to put this thread but I'm really freaking out right now.
My last boyfriend/fling/tryst/whatever dumped me very abruptly for a much younger girl on Myspace six months ago.
So I, in typical fashion, I drank over it and used the opportunity to lay into them both.
Long story short, lots of juvenile drama ensued (are you listening Jerry Springer?) and they've long since 'broke up' three months ago, but I just discovered she's still keeping tabs on me by stalking me online and visiting my Myspace page several times a day and pretty much documenting the whole thing on her profile.

I have told him about it but he doesn't seem to care, and she says on her blog that they remain strong friends (though I don't know if this is true, never heard his side of the story).
But I'm sure her boss would probably be concerned since she's doing all of this at her work (she works at an internet cafe). I have considered getting an anti-harrassment order against her before (after she sent me a dozen vicious text messages within a one minute period) and used my full name in a defamatory post on her blog (though apparently there's no crime against that). I just can't believe it's STILL happening....six months later.

I think that if I get an order against her, at least it will shed some light on the fact she has a problem and so maybe she'll get help. But I also wonder if I'm over-reacting and should just ignore it. But I have to say, it's super creepy.
I've been stalked by jealous ex-girlfriends of guys I've been with before, but not the one I've been dumped for.

LD

P.S. I should add that I am not innocent of stalking myself; I look at his page almost daily to see what he's up to, but nothing more than that.

loner1968 · 12-17-2008, 12:15 PM

MYSPACE is the DEVIL. That's all I can say. Delete your account. Its the only way!

***Done_With_It*** · 12-17-2008, 12:18 PM

Why don't you put your account on private?

Sugah · 12-17-2008, 12:19 PM

Hmm. How old are the three of you?

Peace & Love,
Sugah

LaDita · 12-17-2008, 12:39 PM

Thanks, I've deleted my account several times only to come back. I have some friends who live out of state or in other countries and it's the best way to stay in touch with them. Also, it helps me connect with other artists who do the same things as I do.

It is private though recently it wasn't a couple of times (I left it open for a couple of days when I had some pending friend requests so the people I requested could see who was adding them).

I am 32, he's 33, and she was 20 when this started, but she's 21 now.

I noticed -via her blog- that she has done this before with other women in the past also.

Sugah · 12-17-2008, 12:51 PM

I don't know what line of work you're in, but it really doesn't take much (in $ or in knowledge) to put up a board similar to this for networking. I'd think that would be more of a professional face than what you get at MySpace.

I have a MySpace with many young teen to early 20s girls as friends. It's useful for some of my activist activities. I've had to learn to ignore much of their shenanigans. Of course, none have been directed at me. I think if that were to happen, I'd want to sit down face to face and ask, "Can we be grown ups now?"

Peace & Love,
Sugah

LaDita · 12-17-2008, 12:56 PM

Facebook is another way to go (she can't find me on there and it has a feature which you can block certain people from looking you up) but it's not as user friendly for my needs as I'd like.

Once I tried to reason with her and even gave her my phone number so we could talk like adults or even meet face-to-face but she simply used it against me and kept my phone number to send vicious texts later on.

loner1968 · 12-17-2008, 05:34 PM

I have one and its private. It's for my friends. I have all of about 7 friends on myspace and really never even go on it. I have email and a phone so It's not really important. we send each other gifts through a green spot game where you tend a cyber garden and get points to help save the forests.

I pretty much hate myspace and think its really not a healthy past time the way most use and abuse it. At first I did fall into the drama trap for a few days and went to my XABF and his AGF's page and that was really not good.

They both have hundreds of "friends" which we all know is asinine First I got extremely angry because most of what was on her page were direct digs at ME and It made me realize that she wanted me to look at it. I thought "how immature" and realized that my looking was just as bad!!
I decided to never look at it again and I haven't. I did, however, come to the conclusion that they are both lost and drunk but I knew that anyway so no reason to look anymore.

XABF messaged me and asked if I would change my myspace to public so he could look at it!!! Yeah sure...he's the one person int he world I DON'T want looking at it which is WHY it has always been private.

LaDita · 12-17-2008, 07:42 PM

"It made me realize that she wanted me to look at it. I thought "how immature" and realized that my looking was just as bad!!"

I agree. She was trying to push your buttons and play games and it worked.
The only way I'm not going to get upset and let it get to me is by ignoring them.

12-17-2008, 12:03 AM	#1 (permalink)
LaDita Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 381 Blog Entries: 27	Juvenile Myspace Drama Fiasco I don't really know where to put this thread but I'm really freaking out right now. My last boyfriend/fling/tryst/whatever dumped me very abruptly for a much younger girl on Myspace six months ago. So I, in typical fashion, I drank over it and used the opportunity to lay into them both. Long story short, lots of juvenile drama ensued (are you listening Jerry Springer?) and they've long since 'broke up' three months ago, but I just discovered she's still keeping tabs on me by stalking me online and visiting my Myspace page several times a day and pretty much documenting the whole thing on her profile. I have told him about it but he doesn't seem to care, and she says on her blog that they remain strong friends (though I don't know if this is true, never heard his side of the story). But I'm sure her boss would probably be concerned since she's doing all of this at her work (she works at an internet cafe). I have considered getting an anti-harrassment order against her before (after she sent me a dozen vicious text messages within a one minute period) and used my full name in a defamatory post on her blog (though apparently there's no crime against that). I just can't believe it's STILL happening....six months later. I think that if I get an order against her, at least it will shed some light on the fact she has a problem and so maybe she'll get help. But I also wonder if I'm over-reacting and should just ignore it. But I have to say, it's super creepy. I've been stalked by jealous ex-girlfriends of guys I've been with before, but not the one I've been dumped for. LD P.S. I should add that I am not innocent of stalking myself; I look at his page almost daily to see what he's up to, but nothing more than that.

12-17-2008, 12:18 PM	#3 (permalink)
*Done_With_It* ~7 YEARS BABY~ Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Hollywood Posts: 9,265 Blog Entries: 15	Why don't you put your account on private? __________________ Living in fast forward Hollywood RockStar outta control Need to rewind real slow Always Runin Time to take control Oh yeah ...

12-17-2008, 12:19 PM	#4 (permalink)
Sugah Om, Aum, Ohm... Mini Pool 2 Champion! Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Punxsutawney/Pittsburgh Posts: 4,657	Hmm. How old are the three of you? Peace & Love, Sugah __________________ There's a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done Keep me in your heart for awhile ~WZ ANS 01/29/86 - 08/04/08 DAS 02/27/63 - 05/11/12

12-17-2008, 12:51 PM	#6 (permalink)
Sugah Om, Aum, Ohm... Mini Pool 2 Champion! Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Punxsutawney/Pittsburgh Posts: 4,657	I don't know what line of work you're in, but it really doesn't take much (in $ or in knowledge) to put up a board similar to this for networking. I'd think that would be more of a professional face than what you get at MySpace. I have a MySpace with many young teen to early 20s girls as friends. It's useful for some of my activist activities. I've had to learn to ignore much of their shenanigans. Of course, none have been directed at me. I think if that were to happen, I'd want to sit down face to face and ask, "Can we be grown ups now?" Peace & Love, Sugah __________________ There's a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done Keep me in your heart for awhile ~WZ ANS 01/29/86 - 08/04/08 DAS 02/27/63 - 05/11/12

12-17-2008, 12:15 PM	#2 (permalink)
loner1968 Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 282	MYSPACE is the DEVIL. That's all I can say. Delete your account. Its the only way!

12-17-2008, 12:39 PM	#5 (permalink)
LaDita Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 381 Blog Entries: 27	Thanks, I've deleted my account several times only to come back. I have some friends who live out of state or in other countries and it's the best way to stay in touch with them. Also, it helps me connect with other artists who do the same things as I do. It is private though recently it wasn't a couple of times (I left it open for a couple of days when I had some pending friend requests so the people I requested could see who was adding them). I am 32, he's 33, and she was 20 when this started, but she's 21 now. I noticed -via her blog- that she has done this before with other women in the past also.

12-17-2008, 12:56 PM	#7 (permalink)
LaDita Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 381 Blog Entries: 27	Facebook is another way to go (she can't find me on there and it has a feature which you can block certain people from looking you up) but it's not as user friendly for my needs as I'd like. Once I tried to reason with her and even gave her my phone number so we could talk like adults or even meet face-to-face but she simply used it against me and kept my phone number to send vicious texts later on.

12-17-2008, 05:34 PM	#8 (permalink)
loner1968 Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 282	I have one and its private. It's for my friends. I have all of about 7 friends on myspace and really never even go on it. I have email and a phone so It's not really important. we send each other gifts through a green spot game where you tend a cyber garden and get points to help save the forests. I pretty much hate myspace and think its really not a healthy past time the way most use and abuse it. At first I did fall into the drama trap for a few days and went to my XABF and his AGF's page and that was really not good. They both have hundreds of "friends" which we all know is asinine First I got extremely angry because most of what was on her page were direct digs at ME and It made me realize that she wanted me to look at it. I thought "how immature" and realized that my looking was just as bad!! I decided to never look at it again and I haven't. I did, however, come to the conclusion that they are both lost and drunk but I knew that anyway so no reason to look anymore. XABF messaged me and asked if I would change my myspace to public so he could look at it!!! Yeah sure...he's the one person int he world I DON'T want looking at it which is WHY it has always been private.

12-17-2008, 07:42 PM	#9 (permalink)
LaDita Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 381 Blog Entries: 27	"It made me realize that she wanted me to look at it. I thought "how immature" and realized that my looking was just as bad!!" I agree. She was trying to push your buttons and play games and it worked. The only way I'm not going to get upset and let it get to me is by ignoring them.

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