I made it through surgery!

[MyHeidi]

Hi everyone!

I'm sorry it's been so long since I've posted! I had my back surgery 4 months ago today! I had anterior lumbar spinal fusion on 2 discs. They went in through my abdomen (I have a scar almost a foot long!) and I now have titanium in my back. It has been very painful, but the pain is definitely different than before the surgery!

The meds: I have been on pain meds since the surgery although I am on 1/3 less now than when I got home from the hospital. I truly go back and forth with being on narcotics. My sponsor tells me to look at it as medication and my fiance does hold on to them. I have stopped using them twice on my own only to find myself in very, very bad pain. No physical pain could match the pain of addictive addiction though and that is what scares me about being on them. Opiates were my drug of choice and now I take them every 4 hours. I do not get even a slight buzz from them and I know I have to take them. Most of the time I'm ok with it, but sometimes I'm not. I think about everything I've lost through my addiction and it scares me. I've come very far since being in recovery. I celebrated 1 year free from active addiction yesterday I am back in college (online) - I figured I'd do something productive with the time I'd be laid up - and I just finished my first term with a 98.4 and a 100!!! Not too shabby I am a psychology major with my focus on substance abuse. My dream is to help others dealing with addiction and/or grief and depression.

I realize I'm all over the place with this post, I apologize for that. I just wanted to get these thoughts down and get some folks caught up on how I've been doing since my last post!

Oh, and I got engaged 2 weeks ago to my wonderful, loving partner! He is the absolute best!!! I am truly blessed

[Sugah]

I've been through surgery in recovery, and it is scary. I'm glad you've made it through. Sounds like you have a wonderful sponsor and a wonderful fiance.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

[Sugah]

P.S. Congrats on your 1 year!

[DesertEyes]

Hello there

Wow, what a wonderful post!! You've just got good news all over the place.

Let's see, congratulations on your one year, on the engagement, on the succesful surgery, on your grades, and supportive sponsor. All these wonderful things in your life happening thanks to recovery!

As far as the opiates, yeah I'm scared of them too. I think it's a _good_ thing to be scared of them because it means I understand just how dangerous they really are. I keep a journal of all the meds I take, when I took each one, what for, which I then show my doctors. (I have several doctors) as well as my sponsor, my sponsees, and anybody else that wanders thru my kitchen

So when is the date? We all love to hear happy stories, ya know?

Mike

[Freedom1990]

Good to hear from you, and congratulations on so many good things!

The surgeon I had a consult with last December also recommended a fusion in the lumbar area, but I'm not ready to go that route yet.

Mike gave you an excellent idea on keeping a journal for the pain meds. That is exactly what I am doing right now, and am accountable to several people for that.

I hope to see you posting more!

[Latte]

Thank you so very much for sharing, and congratulations on your sobriety, and your engagement! I think you are right on track.

I had some minor surgery last week and struggled with the idea of pain meds. I ended up not needing them. My husband was holding them, but I just didn't need them. It gave me hope for the next surgery I'm looking at (tonsils).

Thank you for giving me some hope and insight!