Introductions for This New Forum

[lizw]

Do you have any suggestions on how to handle this? I think the turning point for me was a few weeks ago. My daughter and myself went out to dinner and I nearly started blubbering into my meal. She's 13. Since then I have started thinking there must be a better way than this. I can't live the rest of my life crying all the time. I really would be interested in hearing how you handle it? My doc is writing to my nuro about it too. I think when I go back to see him this week, I will take someone with me and also make amends for getting so upset. It's rather shameful acting like a loony.

[barb dwyer]

liz -

I agree with your sponsor.

My own doc is saying that I need to consider something becdause I too am having pain to the extent that it's affecting my decision making and making me emotionally unstable.
After waking up in so much pain today - I made an appointment to speak with her about it. Surely there's something nonnarcotic or non-high I can take other than ibuprophen.

{{{hug}}}

we're all in this together!

[lizw]

Originally Posted by barb dwyer

liz -

I agree with your sponsor.

My own doc is saying that I need to consider something becdause I too am having pain to the extent that it's affecting my decision making and making me emotionally unstable.
After waking up in so much pain today - I made an appointment to speak with her about it. Surely there's something nonnarcotic or non-high I can take other than ibuprophen.

{{{hug}}}

we're all in this together!

And know it's going to become a daily thing for me. It's just great reading everyones ESH. It makes me feel so less alone. Sickness in recovery, so I have discovered, is quite isolating.

I sponsor a lady who has fibro as well as another illness (docs are scanning her for MS shortly too) and always feel better after speaking with her, but so far she's the only one I know. It's been a tuff 18months!!

I've also had more drinking/using dreams in the last 6 months than I have since I got sober.

I've got a bladder scan today and then I got to go enquire about more blood tests to see if I can eat before hand etc... Some of the usual blood tests I get require me to go 12 hours without meds, so they can check my liver.

These last few days I have been thinking, 'I can't' but 'we can'. A friend of mine says it a lot. It is so true.

[Kellye C]

I am thrilled to find this forum. I've been sober for almost 4 years now and have multiple health issues which cause chronic pain. Trying to manage them in sobriety is an issue because while my DOC was food followed by a transfer to alcohol when I had weight loss surgery I know that I like the idea of being able to knock myself out and not deal with life (I did this daily in my alcoholism, I would drink to maintain in public without appearing out of control but to stop the shakes. I would then make sure I had a bottle waiting for me at home to finish the job.)

I find myself taking a lot of ibuprofen which is a no-no for me due to gastric bypass but tylenol is worthless to me and offers no pain relief while naproxen feels like my guts are being eaten alive.

Lyrica has helped a lot with my fibro. Requip keeps my sanity with my RLS. I take one flexeril at night for the muscle spasms associated with the fibro. I get severe colon spasms and have Levsin for that. I take two sleep meds (which don't work all that great but better than nothing) to deal with my longterm insomnia and then lots and lots of ibuprofen! My purse is a walking pharmacy but nothing is abused. Some months I still have some left when it is time for a refill!

It is hard to get people to understand what you go through on a daily basis when you deal with chronic pain and chronic conditions. I have found people in recovery to be judgemental (not everyone for sure but a lot) so I just keep it to myself except for my spouse who is also in recovery and the rest of my family and best friend. Even they don't grasp what it is like so I am thrilled to have somewhere to come to talk, read or both and know that there are others in the same boat. I hope to find alternatives for the pain relief. I am excited about the rice sock and intend to make one tomorrow as my knees kill me constantly. I just went to an Ortho today who said that I have osteoarthritis in both of them along with burn spurs and prescribed a month of physical therapy and excercise to strengthen the muscles. He said it wouldn't be easy nor pain free. Great, just freakin great. He said after 3 months if I have no relief he could discuss going in to clean out the knees arthroscopically.

Ok, enough rambling!

Take care,
Kellye

[jazpoppy]

lizw;

You and I have a lot in common! I was abused as a child by an alcoholic mother. I had a CRAZY upbringing! I don't have MS, but I have fibro, osteoarthritis in my spine, neck, hips and left knee (I am also only 31), a herniated disk in my lower back, and 2 herniated disks in my cervical spine (near my neck) (also called degenerative disk disease), spinal stenosis (all the way from my lumbar spine to my cervical spine) and bone spurs on my facet joints (called facet joint disease), carpel tunnel in both wrists, and last but not least, achilles tendonitis in both of my ankles. So I know pain! I started being diagnosed around the age of 28 as well. I was sober for only a short year (I am an alcoholic and drug addict, opiates being my DOC). I have tried MANY MANY different non-narcotic ways to relieve my pain and have not been successful. I had to leave my job due to the pain after working there for 6 years. I am still jobless, but I found a doctor that does both primary care and pain management and I get to see her for very little money, they go on a sliding scale. I am currently on methadone 10mg x 2pills 3 times a day, Soma at night for muscle spasms, Restoril for sleep, and Flexeril as needed during the day for muscle spasms (doesn't make me as tired as the Soma, so my doctor prescribed Soma only for nighttime and Flexeril for daytime only as needed and if I need it). I am not happy that I have to take narcotic pain relievers for my pain, but I genuinely tried EVERYTHING else to no avail. Then I started trying different narcotics. First I was on vicodin, then moved up to oxycodone (percoset) and vicoprophen (ibuprofen and vicodin together) those things stopped working after a year or so, then they moved me up to the Fentanyl patch which burned my skin and made me VERY sick so they put me on MS Contin (time released morphine) along with Norco 10mg/325mg (Vicodin extra extra strength 10mg and 325mg of tylenol), I hated the morphine but stayed on it for about 2 years because it worked better than percoset and vicodin, but it made me feel grumpy and tired all the time (as well as VERY depressed). The doctor I am seeing currently was the one who started me on Methadone for pain, and it is the best medication as far as pain relief and less side effects that I have tried yet. So I am staying on it for now. I may need some surgeries in the future, but I am waiting for my medicaide to start before I start seeing another orthopaedic specialist again for more images of my back and my knee. So anytime you want to talk privately, just PM me! Have a great day!!! Take care of yourself! I am really sensitive too and cry at the drop of a hat, I was put on dextroamphetamine once for ADHD and that was the only medication that worked for both my ADHD and my depression but it is VERY addictive! I still am on it, but I so rarely take it because of the addiction properties (I don't desire to abuse ANY of my meds due to good solid recovery and a good boyfriend who keeps and distributes all of my medication to me). Welbutrine XL worked VERY well for me to keep me less depressed and to stabilize my emotions, but I had 2 seizures and I can no longer take it. If you don't have seizures, you may want to mention Welbutrine XL to your doctor and see what he/she says about it as an antidepressant along with whatever you are on now (it works best with Paxil, Prozac, Lexapro or Celexa). Hang in there Liz! Write me a PM if you wish.

Sincerely;

Jaz

[jazpoppy]

KelleyD;

I also wanted to respond to you as well as Lizw. You, Liz and I should be neighbors! We'd be great friends and support for each other! Sounds like you need more help in the way of pain management! Can you find a doctor that specializes in pain and possibly an addiction specialist (sometimes if you are lucky you can find a doctor that does both pain management and addiction specialist). I am proud of you for doing your best to find alternatives to narcotics for your pain but it sounds like you are killing your stomach, liver, and kidneys with the Ibuprofen! Please see your doctor and get a referal (unless your doctor is willing to do your pain management) to a pain clinic. They can give you other non-narcotic pain relievers and do mildly invasive procedures to limit or totally remove your need for ibuprofen. You still have to consider that if your pain is really severe enough your doctor may suggest a mild narcotic to see if that helps. Now, you know, you would need to talk to your sponsor for support(if you have one), go to more meetings if you can, and have a TRUSTED friend, spouse or s/o, or a family member hold and distribute the narcotic medication to you to remove all access to it from your hands. That is the BEST way to deal with this type of situation. Believe me, its not that bad if you get the support you need. But lets hope and pray that you don't even need a narcotic pain medication, there are alternatives non-narcotic pain relief methods besides killing yourself with ibuprofen! Promise me you will look into alternatives to ibuprofen and Naproxyn (Alieve)! I don't even know you and I am very worried about you taking so much ibuprofen! Its not healthy, in fact its just as bad as taking too many opiates only there is no real withdrawal, just a possible stomach ulcer and some rebound pain (I used to get rebound headaches when I was taking a lot of ibuprofen myself a long time ago). Take care! Write me a Private Message (PM) if you would like to talk about things in private with me. I would be happy to give you as much support and ESH as I can!

Sincerely;

Jaz

[Kellye C]

Hi Jaz,

Thank you for the welcome and sorry it has taken so long to respond. I actually started an online group in my neck of the woods for people with chronic pain when I was trying to get answers as to what is wrong with me. It stayed small and I am the only (admitted) person with a substance abuse issue although I have been told that I am really not the only one, just the only one out there. Whatever, it certainly isn't my place to judge another's illness or pain because I don't walk in their shoes but I am willing to answer questions if they come up.

My fibro flare seems to have calmed down so I am not taking the massive amounts of ibuprofen that I was but I know that I am going to have to do something different. My rheumatologist prescribed Arthrotec because it combines an NSAID with something to coat your stomach. I am evaluating that now and she said if it helped to call and she would call in a script.

I do have a sponsor in name only at this point. She is pretty vocal about taking any kinds of meds so I doubt I'd get support on this from her. Not sure what to do about that situation. I am unclear of the role of a sponsor at this time in sobriety. I've been through the steps and I have trusted closemouthed friends in the program to bounce things off of when I am unsure of something. I have someone in mind but not sure what we'd do, if she'd become my top trusted closemouthed person or what. I know people with double digit sobriety that still have sponsors and I am not saying I don't need one I'm just not sure what role they would play. Also, I'm in AA. Would I need to go to NA to get a sponsor to help manage meds? Sorry for asking what probably sound like dumb questions I'm just a bit confused!

I am currently looking for a new doctor (not wild about either my rheumy or my primary care) and want someone equipped to treat the whole me and not just pieces of me. Don't know if that is possible or not but it's what I would like.

Anywho, thank you again for the welcome!!!

Kellye