another one for the cat lovers

[soizan]

Harry really hated his old lady's cat. So he put it in the car and drove twenty blocks away and dropped it off. Just as he pulled in the driveway, he noticed the cat sitting on the porch. The next day he decided he would take the cat 40 blocks away and drop it off. But again, the cat found it's way home. Each day he kept going further and further away, but the cat would always find it's way home.


Harry was so furious that he decided to take the cat a few miles away, turned right, then left, circled around, then right again, another right, backtracked a couple of blocks, then left again. Harry then dropped the cat off.

Hours later, he called his wife on the phone, "Honey, is the cat there?"

"Yeah, she answers." "Why?"

Harry replies, "Put the freaking cat on the phone. I'm lost and I need directions!"


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[cwohio]

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cats are smart, yeah they are!

[OneLady]

Good one.

If he thinks the cat is going to help him, he is sadly mistaken.

[OVERIT]

Originally Posted by cwohio

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cats are smart, yeah they are!

[gelfling]

As seen in a dog's diary :

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!


As seen in a cat's diary:
Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continued to
taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced
to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture. Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile pressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite
chair. I must remember to try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, that did not work according to plan ...

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies." I must learn what this is and how I may use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I have patience, I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

[indigo]

Yeah that's cats for you!

[Purrdy]

yep! my cats are just too splendid for words!