Men's Guide To Pms - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

CAPTAINZING2000 · 06-29-2005, 06:23 PM

PMS Guide for Men

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What should men do to cope with PMS? Glad you asked... (take notes!)

1. Pamper your woman! Shower her with love and affection.

2. Duck (a lot).

3. Let her vent. Remember, she probably doesn't mean it.

4. If #3 does not apply, you deserve every bit of it...don't whine.

5. Making dinner will lessen the trauma, take note: Burnt biscuits
will only add to your pain - Order out.

6. Speak only when spoken to - Limit your replies to: "Yes, of
course you're right darling" and "those jeans never fit better."

7. Educate yourself on the magic pills your loved one prefers,
keeping them on hand is a bonus point for you.

8. Keep small children (and other helpless creatures) out of the
path, keep the casualties to a minimum.

9. Gifts and "shiny" tokens of affection are advised, just
remember these words: Frederick's, Macys & Spiegel.
(In Canada, Birk's, Bowring's & Costco/Priceco)

10. Always remember, you are against something way beyond
your power ...

Calvin · 06-29-2005, 06:45 PM

Well Captain all I can say is I learned a long time ago there are some things it's best a man not reply to.
Good luck to you with this one.

I LOVE you ladies ! I DID NOT START THIS THREAD !

Sorry Captain that was a CYA thing.

Time2Surrender · 06-29-2005, 08:10 PM

(((Chris))) Your asking for trouble.Sorry buddy,but your on your own here.

**Ann** · 06-29-2005, 08:34 PM

And let me just add #11...never, but never, even try to guess about a woman's hormones, even we women never know where they're going to take us next

CAPTAINZING2000 · 06-29-2005, 08:55 PM

I forgot 12.

When, you're asked at the beach do you think that blond lady is pretty

abtchonamission · 06-30-2005, 09:37 AM

Cap -

THAT is for thinking that any of US suffer from PMS.

CAPTAINZING2000 · 06-30-2005, 10:00 AM

lol

I was a waiting for your subtle response to this post

abtchonamission · 06-30-2005, 10:20 AM

Anytime. I'm a 'people pleaser."

mishelly · 06-30-2005, 10:37 AM

Hey Cap...you know what PMS stands for don'tcha??? Putting up with Men's Sh*t!

Seriously though, I won't deny it...if emotional outbursts, mostly near-hysterical crying bother you...you don't want to be anywhere around me at that time!!!

CAPTAINZING2000 · 06-30-2005, 10:45 AM

LOL u know how many times, I read your name and couldn't figure it out???

Btw, Shelly

I didn't think women had to put up with our crap after we're potty trained

namommy · 06-30-2005, 11:48 AM

You do know PMS can stand up in court as Mental Insanity in a murder case don't you!?! :AR15firin I like the BIG gun!

abtchonamission · 06-30-2005, 12:05 PM

Laurie - see, you explained it perfectly. IF we should ever have PMS, it would result in guns, not

Fire_Wind_Rain · 06-30-2005, 12:38 PM

Quote:

8. Keep small children (and other helpless creatures) out of the
path, keep the casualties to a minimum.

I really like this one. LMAO!

CAPTAINZING2000 · 06-30-2005, 12:43 PM

My ex ran her arm thru a window and drove the car into the side of the house during the day

That was pure insanity

historyteach · 06-30-2005, 12:51 PM

Chris;
Did you ever notice how all of women's problems begin with men?
1. MENstrual Cramps'
2. MENopause
3. MENtal breakdown
4. MENtal Anxiety
Need I say more??? .....

Shalom!

FaeryQueen · 06-30-2005, 01:01 PM

lol Teach.

Quote:

Gifts and "shiny" tokens of affection are advised, just
remember these words: Frederick's, Macys & Spiegel.

Hello!#@ Where is Tiffany's???
:sm

CAPTAINZING2000 · 06-30-2005, 01:13 PM

Teach,

Eve shouldn't have bit that apple

Live · 06-30-2005, 01:16 PM

I've got to give my ex an A+ on this one, he knew which day before I did to come in the door with Snickers Bars and ask the kids if they wanted to go to McDonald's and fishing.
Just leave me alone with a thriller book and I won't say anything to anybody.

Live · 06-30-2005, 01:54 PM

the correct answer to the question about the pretty blonde:

Oh, I dunno, those knobby knees ( fat ankles, my honey contributes bleached out blonde....and he is talking to a bottle blonde LOL, strange nose) pick one, be imaginative.... just makes everything look out of kilter.

Now, guys, don't even pretend y'all aren't looking for reassurances all the time yourselves!!!!

I am NOT going to tell you what we say.

CAPTAINZING2000 · 06-30-2005, 01:55 PM

LOL

we might not want to know

historyteach · 06-30-2005, 02:06 PM

Probably not, Capt!
Probably not!!!

Shalom!

namommy · 06-30-2005, 07:32 PM

Trust me! You REALLY DO NOT want to know what we think and say!

findinganewme · 07-01-2005, 08:40 AM

CAP, if I didn't know you better you'd get chewed out from me too ......

HOWEVER,

BECAUSE YOU MADE ME LAUGH MY BUTT OFF, I forgive you!

Thanks for the chuckle!

OH .... and MISHELLY ...... right on ...... I knew PMS stood for something that wasn't written by a man! GREAT ONE!!!!!

By the way *GUYS* ....... PMS is real ...... SO LIVE WITH IT (lol)

Maria

abtchonamission · 07-01-2005, 08:51 AM

I do NOT get PMS. It's called 'Hormonally Homicidal' - deal with it!

findinganewme · 07-01-2005, 09:14 AM

amen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![i][u]

06-29-2005, 06:23 PM	#1 (permalink)
CAPTAINZING2000 Psalm 118:24 Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: ILLINOIS Posts: 9,445 Blog Entries: 1	Men's Guide To Pms PMS Guide for Men -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What should men do to cope with PMS? Glad you asked... (take notes!) 1. Pamper your woman! Shower her with love and affection. 2. Duck (a lot). 3. Let her vent. Remember, she probably doesn't mean it. 4. If #3 does not apply, you deserve every bit of it...don't whine. 5. Making dinner will lessen the trauma, take note: Burnt biscuits will only add to your pain - Order out. 6. Speak only when spoken to - Limit your replies to: "Yes, of course you're right darling" and "those jeans never fit better." 7. Educate yourself on the magic pills your loved one prefers, keeping them on hand is a bonus point for you. 8. Keep small children (and other helpless creatures) out of the path, keep the casualties to a minimum. 9. Gifts and "shiny" tokens of affection are advised, just remember these words: Frederick's, Macys & Spiegel. (In Canada, Birk's, Bowring's & Costco/Priceco) 10. Always remember, you are against something way beyond your power ... __________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6

06-29-2005, 08:34 PM	#4 (permalink)
Ann Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake Posts: 25,172	And let me just add #11...never, but never, even try to guess about a woman's hormones, even we women never know where they're going to take us next __________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~

06-29-2005, 08:55 PM	#5 (permalink)
CAPTAINZING2000 Psalm 118:24 Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: ILLINOIS Posts: 9,445 Blog Entries: 1	I forgot 12. When, you're asked at the beach do you think that blond lady is pretty __________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6

06-30-2005, 09:37 AM	#6 (permalink)
abtchonamission Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: In the mountain air Posts: 1,345	Cap - THAT is for thinking that any of US suffer from PMS. __________________ Faith... When you come to the end of all the light you know and you are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly.

06-30-2005, 10:00 AM	#7 (permalink)
CAPTAINZING2000 Psalm 118:24 Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: ILLINOIS Posts: 9,445 Blog Entries: 1	lol I was a waiting for your subtle response to this post __________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6

06-29-2005, 06:45 PM	#2 (permalink)
Calvin Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: anywhere USA Posts: 69	Well Captain all I can say is I learned a long time ago there are some things it's best a man not reply to. Good luck to you with this one. I LOVE you ladies ! I DID NOT START THIS THREAD ! Sorry Captain that was a CYA thing.

06-29-2005, 08:10 PM	#3 (permalink)
Time2Surrender Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Washington State Posts: 7,263 Blog Entries: 7	(((Chris))) Your asking for trouble.Sorry buddy,but your on your own here.

06-30-2005, 10:20 AM	#8 (permalink)
abtchonamission Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: In the mountain air Posts: 1,345	Anytime. I'm a 'people pleaser." __________________ Faith... When you come to the end of all the light you know and you are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly.

06-30-2005, 10:37 AM	#9 (permalink)
mishelly It Is What It Is Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Peculiar, MO Posts: 292	Hey Cap...you know what PMS stands for don'tcha??? Putting up with Men's Sht! Seriously though, I won't deny it...if emotional outbursts, mostly near-hysterical crying bother you...you don't want to be anywhere around me at that time!!! __________________ Mishelly* â€œUnless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not.â€ - Dr. Seuss

06-30-2005, 10:45 AM	#10 (permalink)
CAPTAINZING2000 Psalm 118:24 Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: ILLINOIS Posts: 9,445 Blog Entries: 1	LOL u know how many times, I read your name and couldn't figure it out??? Btw, Shelly I didn't think women had to put up with our crap after we're potty trained __________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6

06-30-2005, 11:48 AM	#11 (permalink)
namommy Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: Never, Never land Posts: 2,851 Blog Entries: 1	You do know PMS can stand up in court as Mental Insanity in a murder case don't you!?! :AR15firin I like the BIG gun! __________________ I came into this program to save my a** and found out it was attached to my soul. -- Anonymous

06-30-2005, 12:05 PM	#12 (permalink)
abtchonamission Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: In the mountain air Posts: 1,345	Laurie - see, you explained it perfectly. IF we should ever have PMS, it would result in guns, not __________________ Faith... When you come to the end of all the light you know and you are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly.

06-30-2005, 12:43 PM	#14 (permalink)
CAPTAINZING2000 Psalm 118:24 Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: ILLINOIS Posts: 9,445 Blog Entries: 1	I should know better My ex ran her arm thru a window and drove the car into the side of the house during the day That was pure insanity __________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6

06-30-2005, 12:51 PM	#15 (permalink)
historyteach To Life! Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Rhode Island Posts: 9,303	Chris; Did you ever notice how all of women's problems begin with men? 1. MENstrual Cramps' 2. MENopause 3. MENtal breakdown 4. MENtal Anxiety Need I say more??? ..... Shalom! __________________ IMAGINE

06-30-2005, 01:13 PM	#17 (permalink)
CAPTAINZING2000 Psalm 118:24 Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: ILLINOIS Posts: 9,445 Blog Entries: 1	Teach, Eve shouldn't have bit that apple __________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6

07-01-2005, 09:14 AM	#25 (permalink)
findinganewme old enough to know BETTER!!!!! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: NY, NY Posts: 403	amen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![i][u]

06-30-2005, 01:16 PM	#18 (permalink)
Live Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Bristol TN/VA Posts: 11,305 Blog Entries: 5	I've got to give my ex an A+ on this one, he knew which day before I did to come in the door with Snickers Bars and ask the kids if they wanted to go to McDonald's and fishing. Just leave me alone with a thriller book and I won't say anything to anybody. __________________ Each small candle lights a corner of the dark....Roger Waters

06-30-2005, 01:54 PM	#19 (permalink)
Live Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Bristol TN/VA Posts: 11,305 Blog Entries: 5	the correct answer to the question about the pretty blonde: Oh, I dunno, those knobby knees ( fat ankles, my honey contributes bleached out blonde....and he is talking to a bottle blonde LOL, strange nose) pick one, be imaginative.... just makes everything look out of kilter. Now, guys, don't even pretend y'all aren't looking for reassurances all the time yourselves!!!! I am NOT going to tell you what we say. __________________ Each small candle lights a corner of the dark....Roger Waters

06-30-2005, 01:55 PM	#20 (permalink)
CAPTAINZING2000 Psalm 118:24 Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: ILLINOIS Posts: 9,445 Blog Entries: 1	LOL we might not want to know __________________ LIFE IS GOD'S GIFT TO YOU WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE IS YOUR GIFT TO GOD J - Jesus first O - Others next Y - Yourself last John 14:6

06-30-2005, 02:06 PM	#21 (permalink)
historyteach To Life! Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Rhode Island Posts: 9,303	Probably not, Capt! Probably not!!! Shalom! __________________ IMAGINE

06-30-2005, 07:32 PM	#22 (permalink)
namommy Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: Never, Never land Posts: 2,851 Blog Entries: 1	Trust me! You REALLY DO NOT want to know what we think and say! __________________ I came into this program to save my a** and found out it was attached to my soul. -- Anonymous

07-01-2005, 08:40 AM	#23 (permalink)
findinganewme old enough to know BETTER!!!!! Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: NY, NY Posts: 403	CAP, if I didn't know you better you'd get chewed out from me too ...... HOWEVER, BECAUSE YOU MADE ME LAUGH MY BUTT OFF, I forgive you! Thanks for the chuckle! OH .... and MISHELLY ...... right on ...... I knew PMS stood for something that wasn't written by a man! GREAT ONE!!!!! By the way GUYS ....... PMS is real ...... SO LIVE WITH IT (lol) Maria

07-01-2005, 08:51 AM	#24 (permalink)
abtchonamission Member Join Date: May 2004 Location: In the mountain air Posts: 1,345	I do NOT get PMS. It's called 'Hormonally Homicidal' - deal with it! __________________ Faith... When you come to the end of all the light you know and you are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught how to fly.

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