Duh..... - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

margo · 09-16-2002, 09:04 AM

ACTUAL PRODUCT LABEL INSTRUCTIONS:

1. On packaging for a Rowenta iron: DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

2. On a New Zealand insect spray: THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS

3. On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists: REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.

4. On a Taiwanese shampoo: USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.

5. On the bottle-top of a British flavoured milk drink: AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.

6. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.

7. In an American guide to setting up a new computer: TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)

8. On a packet of American Sunmaid raisins: WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?

9. On an American Sears hairdryer: DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.

10. On a bag of American Fritos-brand Corn Chips: YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.

11. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.

12. On a Korean kitchen knife: WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.

13. On a Japanese food processor: NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.

14. On British Sainsbury's peanuts: WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.

15. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.

16. On a Swedish chainsaw: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

17. On a Canadian child's Superman costume: WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.

18. On some British frozen dinners: SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST.

19. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box: FITS ONE HEAD.

20. On a British "Children's" Cough Medicine: DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

21. On a British Nytol Sleep Aid Tablets label: WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

22. On British Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

10-05-2002, 12:09 AM

DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY

I'm guilty

HollyR · 10-05-2002, 12:21 AM

OMG!!!! I haven't laughed so hard all week! Thank you :-)

**Ann** · 10-05-2002, 07:23 AM

That Swedish chainsaw could be deadly....I'm not stopping it

09-16-2002, 09:04 AM	#1 (permalink)
margo Member Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: North Vancouver, British Columbia Posts: 1,727	Duh..... ACTUAL PRODUCT LABEL INSTRUCTIONS: 1. On packaging for a Rowenta iron: DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY. 2. On a New Zealand insect spray: THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS 3. On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists: REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU. 4. On a Taiwanese shampoo: USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE. 5. On the bottle-top of a British flavoured milk drink: AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT. 6. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY. 7. In an American guide to setting up a new computer: TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING. (Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.) 8. On a packet of American Sunmaid raisins: WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL? 9. On an American Sears hairdryer: DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING. 10. On a bag of American Fritos-brand Corn Chips: YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE. 11. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN. 12. On a Korean kitchen knife: WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN. 13. On a Japanese food processor: NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE. 14. On British Sainsbury's peanuts: WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS. 15. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS. 16. On a Swedish chainsaw: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS. 17. On a Canadian child's Superman costume: WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY. 18. On some British frozen dinners: SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST. 19. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box: FITS ONE HEAD. 20. On a British "Children's" Cough Medicine: DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY. 21. On a British Nytol Sleep Aid Tablets label: WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS. 22. On British Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

10-05-2002, 07:23 AM	#4 (permalink)
Ann Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake Posts: 25,170	That Swedish chainsaw could be deadly....I'm not stopping it __________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~

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10-05-2002, 12:09 AM	#2 (permalink)
Morning Glory Guest Posts: n/a	DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY I'm guilty

10-05-2002, 12:21 AM	#3 (permalink)
HollyR Paused Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Dearborn, MI USA Posts: 5	OMG!!!! I haven't laughed so hard all week! Thank you :-)

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