Short Jokes from Dad

[Debbie]

Adult content be warned



<center>This old couple is ready to go to sleep so the old man
lays on the bed but the old woman lays on the floor.

The old man asks, "Why are you going to sleep on the
floor?"

The old woman says, "Because I want to feel something
hard for a change."

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I think if I could ask God just one question, it would
have to be:

"Just what were you thinking of when you came up with
the idea for pubic hair?"

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"Keep making that face, and it's going to freeze that
way," was what my mother used to say to us when we
were kids.

I knew times had changed when she noticed my sister
scowling recently and warned, "Keep making that face,
and you're going to need Botox."

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I was shopping with my hubby at a local supermarket
and suddenly couldn't find him. "I've lost my
husband!" I muttered slightly louder than was
necessary.

Then I heard a woman's voice from the next aisle:
"Some people have all the luck."

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A defendant was asked if he wanted a bench trial
or a jury trial.
"Jury trial," he replied.
"Do you understand the difference?" asked the judge.
"Sure," replied the defendant," That's where twelve
ignorant people decide my fate instead of one."

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Our medical office is moving soon and we ran across a pile of
old chest x-rays that were gathering dust in a closet.

We were pondering what to do with them when our office Blonde
piped up and said, "Let's donate them to the poor people who
can't afford x-rays of their own."

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"Agents in Hollywood say that Winona Ryder's career could be
hotter than ever after her well publicized trial. Immediately
after hearing this, Emilio Estevez went out and stole a car."
-Conan O'Brien</center>

[2stop]

Those were funny! *LOL*

[solotraveler]

Laughter is the only medicine that should be ever be prescribed.