Friday Funnies - 9/15/06 - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

cwohio · 09-15-2006, 06:47 AM

cup-o-puppies anyone? LOL

cwohio · 09-15-2006, 07:12 AM

cwohio · 09-15-2006, 09:14 AM

One day old man Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the Illinois State Fair. There is this man selling plane rides in his single prop show plane for $10 per person. Stumpy looks to Martha and says, "Martha, I think I really should try that." Martha replies, "I know you want to Stumpy, but we have a lot of bills, and you know the money is tight, and $10 is $10." So Stumpy goes without. Over the next few years they return every year, and the same thing, Stumpy wants to ride, but Martha says no money.

Finally, when Stumpy and Martha are both about 70 years old, Stumpy looks to Martha, and says, "Martha, I'm 70 now, and I don't know if I'll ever get the chance again, so I just have to have a ride in that there airplane." Martha replies in the same old fashion, and Stumpy kind of slumps down. The pilot is standing near by and overhears the conversation...

The pilot pipes up, "Excuse me folks, I couldn't help but hear your situation, and I have a deal for you. I'll take both of you up together, and if you can both make the entire trip without saying a word, or even making the slightest sound, I'll give the ride for free. But if either of you make a sound, its $10 each." Well, Martha and Stumpy look at each other, and agree to take the ride.

The pilot takes them up, and starts to do loop de loops, twists, dives, climbs and spins. No sound. The pilot lands the plane, looks back at Stumpy and says, "Sir, I have to hand it to ya, you didn't make even the slightest sound and that was my best stuff." Stumpy looks back at the pilot and says, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but $10 is $10!"

**Ann** · 09-15-2006, 02:00 PM

nocellphone · 09-15-2006, 02:56 PM

cwohio · 09-15-2006, 03:42 PM

thanks for the additions you two!

biker chicks......too funny!

best · 09-15-2006, 06:35 PM

*"Doctor, I have an ear ache."
2000 BC - "Here, eat this root."
1000 BC - "That root is heathen, say this prayer."
1850 AD - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion."
1940 AD - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill."
1985 AD - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic."
2000 AD - "That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root!"

cwohio · 09-15-2006, 07:02 PM

isn't that the doggone truth!

wolflet · 09-16-2006, 11:22 PM

best...you rock....

09-15-2006, 06:47 AM	#1 (permalink)
cwohio Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Litterbox City Posts: 6,142	Friday Funnies - 9/15/06 cup-o-puppies anyone? LOL __________________ *Learn to write your hurts in sand. Learn to carve your blessings in stone! - Unknown*

09-15-2006, 07:12 AM	#2 (permalink)
cwohio Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Litterbox City Posts: 6,142	Fist-O-Gators __________________ *Learn to write your hurts in sand. Learn to carve your blessings in stone! - Unknown*

09-15-2006, 09:14 AM	#3 (permalink)
cwohio Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Litterbox City Posts: 6,142	$10 is $10 One day old man Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the Illinois State Fair. There is this man selling plane rides in his single prop show plane for $10 per person. Stumpy looks to Martha and says, "Martha, I think I really should try that." Martha replies, "I know you want to Stumpy, but we have a lot of bills, and you know the money is tight, and $10 is $10." So Stumpy goes without. Over the next few years they return every year, and the same thing, Stumpy wants to ride, but Martha says no money. Finally, when Stumpy and Martha are both about 70 years old, Stumpy looks to Martha, and says, "Martha, I'm 70 now, and I don't know if I'll ever get the chance again, so I just have to have a ride in that there airplane." Martha replies in the same old fashion, and Stumpy kind of slumps down. The pilot is standing near by and overhears the conversation... The pilot pipes up, "Excuse me folks, I couldn't help but hear your situation, and I have a deal for you. I'll take both of you up together, and if you can both make the entire trip without saying a word, or even making the slightest sound, I'll give the ride for free. But if either of you make a sound, its $10 each." Well, Martha and Stumpy look at each other, and agree to take the ride. The pilot takes them up, and starts to do loop de loops, twists, dives, climbs and spins. No sound. The pilot lands the plane, looks back at Stumpy and says, "Sir, I have to hand it to ya, you didn't make even the slightest sound and that was my best stuff." Stumpy looks back at the pilot and says, "Well, I was gonna say something when Martha fell out, but $10 is $10!" __________________ *Learn to write your hurts in sand. Learn to carve your blessings in stone! - Unknown*

09-15-2006, 02:00 PM	#4 (permalink)
Ann Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake Posts: 25,173	Biker Chicks __________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~

09-15-2006, 02:56 PM	#5 (permalink)
nocellphone Cruelty-Free Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Body: South Florida Heart: Yosemite National Park Posts: 913	I'll take a mulligan... __________________ Oh, yeah!!! Recovery is not a mysterious process. The only mystery is why it took some of us so long to get here... and why some choose not to stay.

09-15-2006, 03:42 PM	#6 (permalink)
cwohio Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Litterbox City Posts: 6,142	thanks for the additions you two! biker chicks......too funny! __________________ *Learn to write your hurts in sand. Learn to carve your blessings in stone! - Unknown*

09-15-2006, 06:35 PM	#7 (permalink)
best Don't get undies in a bunch Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: South Shore MA Posts: 7,166	"Doctor, I have an ear ache." 2000 BC - "Here, eat this root." 1000 BC - "That root is heathen, say this prayer." 1850 AD - "That prayer is superstition, drink this potion." 1940 AD - "That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill." 1985 AD - "That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic." 2000 AD - "That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root!" __________________ I asked God to spare me pain. God said "No", Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me. Recovery Related Acronym B. E. S. T. = Been Enjoying Sobriety Today?

09-15-2006, 07:02 PM	#8 (permalink)
cwohio Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Litterbox City Posts: 6,142	isn't that the doggone truth! __________________ *Learn to write your hurts in sand. Learn to carve your blessings in stone! - Unknown*

09-16-2006, 11:22 PM	#9 (permalink)
wolflet fire dancer Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: no matter where u go there u are...co Posts: 489	best...you rock.... __________________ how we spend our days is how we spend our lives

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