I wanna stop

[FaithChaser]

Okay,
The fact that I'm posting this must mean I'm serious... I didn't smoke at all during the day yesterday. I never do around my family. I don't smoke at work, but as soon as I come home, I start it up again. I always have the excuse of something as to why it isn't the right time to do it. Before I was heavier and it was, "after I lose the weight, I'm quitting." That was three years ago. Now my excuse is, "I'm too stressed out being married to an alcoholic" and with the idea looming over me of leaving I cling even more to these cancer sticks. So okay if I can go 8 hours smoke free I can go 16? Maybe even an entire day? Okay I know I know, just for the next 5 minutes right! I feel like regardless of what is going on in my life, it is time to take this addiction seriously, the ah brings it up as being just as bad as his drinking and really I agree with him. It may kill me before his booze kills him.

Hugs,
~FaithChaser

[historyteach]

Hiya, Faithchaser!
Do you have a plan yet?
If you can go all day, well, of course you can go all night. Intellectually, you know that, don't you?

Is it fear that's stopping you? I can really relate to that -- especially with stressors in our lives too. We have a strong bond with our cigarettes; as my doctor pointed out, it's the longest relationship I've ever had! So, what will we do during stressful times if we don't go and reach for our best friend, the nicodemon?

In order to make a plan, I called 1 800 Try to St(op). As I've since discovered, that's a New England number which links us with helpful resources. So, I don't know where you live, though. If you are in NE, call!

If not, call the American Cancer Society. They've sent me workbooks to prepare me and to get me though difficult times. THey've also set up telephone counseling for me. And set me up with a smoke cessation group that gives free patches, gum.... I am using everything I can get my hands on! Also, see your doctor, and get on zyban, (welbutrin), a prescription shown to help increase odds of quitting.

The workbooks and the counseling sessions help us plan what to do rather than reach for a cigarette. For example, I had to plan what I would do during the holidays, knowing I'd be with smoking family members.

I also went back to the gym. That helps with my stress. I've meditated, done deep breathing exercises, walked away from tempting situations. All of these strategies have helped me to remain smoke free for three weeks, six days, 11 hours, 43 minutes and 27 seconds. That's 1099 cigarettes not smoked, saving $302.37. Life saved: 3 days, 19 hours, 35 minutes. At one point in my life, I smoked over three packs of cigarettes a day. When I quit, I was back to two packs a day.

I am addicted to nicotine. There are times I've had to take it one second at a time. People here on this web site have been so very suportive when I struggles, whined, and feared relapse!For a few days, I had panic attacks. I took a small prescription, on the advice of my doctor, for a couple of days. I no longer have the panic attacks and no longer need the medication. Listen to those who've gone before you -- those with some clean time already. Do what they do. Do whatever it takes.

Faithchaser, we're here for you when you make the decision. You need to make a plan and then follow it. Come here and get whatever support you need. We'll be rooting you on! You CAN do this!!!

So, quit and become a winner!!!

Shalom!

[New2Sobriety]

Hey Faith....

Just wanted to say I decided yesterday was the day for me, too, not just to quit smoking but to drop the booze (again!). Made it the entire day without a smoke or a drink! Now it's day two and it truly is just taking five minutes at a time. But, I'm still smoke-free and drink-free and I've told myself "one year, I can live correctly for one year". I want to see how much different my life is next Christmas day after living correctly for one year. I already see how next weekend without buying cigarettes and booze all week I'll be able to take a drive into the Mojave desert and go play around in the outdoors with my husband! Just the money I save in one week will pay for the gas and the picnic lunch I plan to take!

That never would have happened with me boozing and drinking! So, it's little changes like this I'm sure looking forward to.

Hope you'll hang in there and find your strength where and when you need it.

Wishing you good fortune!

[historyteach]

New2sobriety;
Congratulations!!! Way to Go!!!

You make an important point, that I omitted. Reward yourself for milestones!

Just the money I save in one week will pay for the gas and the picnic lunch I plan to take!

What a wonderful plan to go and have a picnic in the desert!
I bought myself a chaise lounge, and I jsut LOVE it!

So, what will you reward yourself with for different milestones? It's so much fun to plan what we're going to give ourselves!!! hehehe.

Shalom!

[FaithChaser]

Thank you very much for your comments! I'm going to try to type out a plan tonight, come up with some ideas to do rather than smoking when I'm stressed out or just needing a break. I agree that planning ahead for sticky craving situations will help, it seems to be why I've started again after every attempt to stop. Lack of planning for being around others that are smoking.
And, Christina that is AWESOME!!!! What an inspiring thing to think about! What will life be like in one year if I stop now???? I know I can do this, I quit using cocaine 12 plus years ago, you'd think this would be a breeze in comparison. I just so despritely want a healthy lifestyle.
Thanks again and HUGS!!!
~FaithChaser

[New2Sobriety]

HistoryTeach calls it milestones and rewards. I sort of see it as substituting one behavior for another. Instead of standing out on my condo deck drinking a glass of wine and smoking, cough, cough, I'll be outdoors running around, actually enjoying the sights AND the scents of the desert. I guess that would be a reward but for me, I'll just be looking at it as beginning my healthier lifestyle (for a year!). I keep telling myself it's only a year. I can do this because, the way I see it, maybe I only have a year left to live, who knows? Maybe I have 50 left? I would like to be able to say that I at least lived one year correctly, healthy, experienced life truly the way it was meant to be experienced. Wouldn't we all at least like to have one year of our lives not spent altered?

And, of course, even though I delude myself by saying "only one year", we all know after one year my life is going to be completely different in so many ways, and I doubt seriously I'll ever want to go back to the way I've been living.

I've been with my husband now for nearly four years. Four years of boozing and over-eating and smoking and slowly declining in all aspects of my life, physically, emotionally, sexually, financially. What's one year of living properly now? (Not trying to associate my husband with any of this behavior, either. He doesn't participate in any of it.) I just know I need a year of doing the right thing, and then I'll look back and take a re-assessment.

I'm quite certain I'll like what I see.

Hang in there........

[historyteach]

One other thing that Bikewrench made me think of, is the inevitable loss of loved ones we will face at some point. My mom is old. It's only a matter of time. So, I've faced the reality, but, haven't really made my plan yet. I know she would be pissed if I smoked as a result of her death, though. So, that's an incentive. But, I've got to plan ahead for that.

Faith, I can really understand that the failure to plan is really a plan to fail. No athelete, scholar, scientist....goes and acheives something without visualizing it first. Visualize yourself smoke free.

Oh, and btw, I am not coughing like I was and it feels so much better!!!

Keep up the good work, guys! You CAN do this!!!

Shalom!

[New2Sobriety]

Hey Teach?

My mom is old, too. She's 74, had four heart attacks, open heart surgery, has diabetes, and still smokes like a GD steam train. Walking into her place is like walking into a gas chamber. Even when I smoked, when I came home from her place I'd have to rip all my clothes off and shower to get rid of the stench. Even having her ride in my car took days to get the smell out.

I know this may have been her last Christmas. I don't see anyway she can possibly outlive a fifth heart attack. After the last one, the doc said 33% of her heart is completely dead, it doesn't even move or beat anymore. And that was four years ago.

I don't want to smoke anymore. I want the rest of my life to be the way God meant for it to be. I want to be sober, think clearly, and have energy and the lung capacity to do what I like to do most, which is be active and enjoy the rest of my life.

Almost the end of day two. Still sober and smoke-free.

Thanks for listening.

[HEALEDbyFAITH]

Well, I see you have gotten more advice to make a plan, which I have advised you before. LOL I hope hearing it from someone else helps you to actually do it. Good luck I've been where you are with the smokes and its HARD but it's also doable. Good luck, write that plan down and put it where you have no choice but to look at it often!! Hugs for good measure....HBF

[historyteach]

New2sobriety;
Sorry to hear about your mom. It is something we all have to face, unfortunately. It's just so dang hard, though...
But, you know you don't want to smoke. And THAT'S most important right now! 2 days!!! YEA!!!
One more thing. I fully appreciate what you're saying when you talk about taking on a new lifestyle. In fact, my smoke counselor was talking about that just today.

Seems it takes 6 weeks of doing something regularly for it to become habituated. What he said was for each of us to start doing something - preferable something active that would be negatively impacted if we try to smoke again - for those 6 weeks. For example, I started up at the gym again. If I maintain that practice for six weeks, it becomes a habit. And that habit replaces the cigarette habit.

So, definately do something to enhance your lifestyle. And make it a habit. Oh, and reward yourself too!

Keep up the good work!!!
Shalom!