Fighting to not buy smokes - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

beegee · 08-02-2008, 09:06 AM

I am under a bit of pressure now and I want so much to go buy ciggies. I stopped almost 6 months ago before my surgery.August 7th will be 6 months exactly.I have been fighting this urge and doing ok so far.
But now I feel like I have more of an excuse to go buy a pack and smoke. And really my excuse isn't even legit yet. So it is an excuse to have an excuse to smoke. Clever of my silly mind to work so hard on trying to cheat.

I think I can talk myself out of it like this. This was good to post here. Because it makes me feel more guilty reading my own words for some reason.
I can't believe how strong the urge is just as if I stopped yesterday.

Ok I am going to get bust so I don't dwell on this too much today, I don't want to go out and buy smokes I don't. Thanks for letting me vent.

JMFburns · 08-02-2008, 10:14 PM

beegee,

I've been struggling myself - was walking to my car through the garage & there at my feet someone had dropped a cig from their pack - dang if I didn't pick it up and smoke it! ARGH!

I reasoned with myself that maybe the desire to go buy a pack wouldn't be so bad now.

Glad to hear that posting/venting helped you a bit. Keep up your good work!

08-02-2008, 09:06 AM	#1 (permalink)
beegee Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: USA Posts: 427	Fighting to not buy smokes I am under a bit of pressure now and I want so much to go buy ciggies. I stopped almost 6 months ago before my surgery.August 7th will be 6 months exactly.I have been fighting this urge and doing ok so far. But now I feel like I have more of an excuse to go buy a pack and smoke. And really my excuse isn't even legit yet. So it is an excuse to have an excuse to smoke. Clever of my silly mind to work so hard on trying to cheat. I think I can talk myself out of it like this. This was good to post here. Because it makes me feel more guilty reading my own words for some reason. I can't believe how strong the urge is just as if I stopped yesterday. Ok I am going to get bust so I don't dwell on this too much today, I don't want to go out and buy smokes I don't. Thanks for letting me vent. __________________ "If we always do, what we have always done, We will always have, what we always had".

08-02-2008, 10:14 PM	#2 (permalink)
JMFburns Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Burnsville, MN Posts: 679	beegee, I've been struggling myself - was walking to my car through the garage & there at my feet someone had dropped a cig from their pack - dang if I didn't pick it up and smoke it! ARGH! I reasoned with myself that maybe the desire to go buy a pack wouldn't be so bad now. Glad to hear that posting/venting helped you a bit. Keep up your good work! __________________ Guide my every thought and may these thoughts guide all my actions. March 17 Nar-Anon SESH

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