Day 2

[Zanthos]

Smoked for 32 years. Have quit dozens of times, never more than a day or two. (Except for the year I didn't smoke cigs, but smoked pot everyday.)

Don't know why, but this time it feels different. I'm really ready to not smoke anymore. I'm really sick of it.

I've told myself that I'm going to let this take me wherever it does -- mentally, emotionally, physically. Any level of discomfort or strangeness is better than smoking anymore.

I stopped drinking 3+ years ago, and the smoking feels in many ways like the drinking did. It makes my world smaller and more limited than it needs to be/should be. Hmmmm, thats backwards. I make my world smaller, I react to life in a very limited way, by smoking.

Only after I stopped drinking could I fully realize how sick it was to pour that much booze into my body for so long. And only after I've been able to acknowledge that I don't want to smoke anymore can I clearly see how unbelievably sick it is to compulsively inhale such a noxious mix of poisons into my lungs all day everyday. What a sorry ass substitute for breathing.

Boy, I've been a real sick puppy my whole life. At least a self-destructive one. Well I'm sick of being sick. So I'm not going to pick up that first cigarette. And I'm going to rely on others to help me because I can't do this alone.

[cece1960]

Glad you're here Zanthos.
And thanks for the reminder of why I'm here
(((Hugs)))

[Zanthos]

OK, it's Day 5 now.

I went at this cold turkey. If I prepared at all, it was by rolling my own American Spirit tobacco for the last few months. Which maybe got me away from some of the chemicals in regular cigarettes.

I haven't had any hardcore cravings. At least nothing I've had to battle against in any way. Just been taking it easy, sleeping a lot, reading and watching TV. Of course, it FEELS weird to not smoke. Real weird. But I'm enjoying how relaxed I feel, and how the chronic tension in my throat and neck is melting away.

My goal is to get to Day 14, which is to say that until then I am on a kind of "vacation". I really don't know what that means, except that I'm taking it really easy on myself.

[Astro]

What a surprise to see this post! I'm very proud of you my old friend, and hope you continue to stay tobacco free.

[Zanthos]

And how come you never say hello to me when I actually see you in person?

[Astro]

Ya know you can say hello too! It takes two people to have a conversation :rof