alcoholism vs alcohol abuse

[skyhigh525]

How can I find out if my husband is an alcoholic. He ask me for help.
Is my first time in this website.

[historyteach]

Skyhigh525;
Here is a thread that may help... It gives the medical difference between the two, alcoholism and alcohol abuse.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ad.php?t=60342 (alcoholism or alcohol abuse...what's the difference?)

I would like to point out one of the posts on the thread, though...
It was posted by Peter.

"My long winded reply to the "Alcoholism Vs. Alcohol abuse" debate.
I NEVER ABUSED ALCOHOL.......I USED ALCOHOL TO ABUSE MYSELF."

SHort, simple truth. Amazing. That answered it all for me. The academics are just that; polemics that are meaningless.
Hope this helps.
Shalom!

[minnie]

Welcome, skyhigh. This is a great place for information on addiction and living with someone who has addiction problems.

To be honest, my first question would be why your husband isn't the one asking whether or not he is an alcoholic? He is the only one that can know that and also, he is the only one that can do anything about it. My ex fiance is an alcoholic and I learned through this site that I didn't cause him to drink, I can't control his drinking and I can't cure it.

I would urge you to come down and join us on the Friends and Families of Alcoholics forum. Those of us who share/have shared our lives with problem drinkers hang out there. There's a chair being kept warm for you and I'm sure someone, probably Paula A, has some coffee on too.

Looking forward to getting to know you.

Love

Minnie
xxx

[Time2Surrender]

Hello Shyhigh.Welcome to SoberRecovery. You have come to a great place for some answers and also plenty of support from people going through the same thing.

[Loulouise]

Originally Posted by skyhigh525

How can I find out if my husband is an alcoholic. He ask me for help.
Is my first time in this website.

Hi Skyhigh525,
I am new here but if someone asked me for help I would be incline to think they might need it but it is not up to us to make the call, it is up to them.
HUGS

[pedagogue]

One of the more common screeners for alcoholism is called the MAST (Michigan Alcohol Screenting Test)

http://128.83.80.200/mast/mast.qry?function=form

This may be a good start to start the dialogue about a possible problem.

Please note a screener is not sufficient to diagnose alcoholism, but it can provide a reason to look further. Some of the questions above are also a good place to start a dialogue.

-pedagogue

[saintintx]

Skyhigh,
While it's true that the problem is your husband's, I think it is important that you learn all you can. If he is seeking help, give him the encouragement that he needs to take the steps he needs to take.
Everyone is very quick to say, it 's not your problem, it's his, but you may be able to provide somethimg for him that he needs, which is support.
I learned the hard way.. 3-1/2 years ago my BF told me he thought he might have a drinking problem. I didn't know how to react, so I didn't. It was apparently weighing on his mind because he did look into AA and detox, but I think got scared away by what he was told detox would be like. When he told me he was looking into it, i never said a word. But I think he felt embarassed (as there is a stigma with alcoholism) and he was afraid. He was afraid of what his family would think. All I said to him was I was support whatever decision he made and if he felf he needed to do something about it, I'd be there for him. He was really afraid of how he would change and if I would want to be with him afterwards.
Boy, How I wish I had known how bad it was... He was very skillful at drinking, never appeared drunk, was not abusive, arrogant, No one knew how bad it was until he almost killed himself. Had I known more about this disease maybe I would have said something earlier that would have prompted him to go to rehab. When his health got so bad and his family and I finally expressed concern (he was hiding the health issues very well), he agreed he was ready for rehab. He was afraid to take that first step.
He is now 6 month sober, has gotten his health back (almost, still some residual damage that he is working on), is a joy to be around, likes to go out and do things again (Before all he wanted to do was sit in front of the TV and drink.).
So learn what you can, be supportive, let him know you love him and want him around for years to come ... if you really do (lol)!