12 Steps before you work the 12 Steps (Funny) - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

tyler · 04-15-2005, 02:53 PM

12 Steps of Pre-Program

1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing- that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us.

2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and the rest of the world was insane.

3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills and lives over to our care even though they couldn't understand us at all.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral and immoral inventory of everyone we knew.

5. Admitted to the whole world at large the exact nature of everyone else's wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to make others straighten up and do right.

7. Demanded others to either "shape up or ship out."

8. Made a list of all persons who had harmed us and became willing to go to any lengths to get even with them all.

9. Got direct revenge wherever possible. Except when to do so would cost us our own lives or at least a stiff jail sentence.

10. Continued to take the inventory of others and when they were wrong promptly and repeatedly told them about it.

11. Sought through bitching, complaining, and nagging to improve our relations with others as we couldn't understand them at all, asking only that they knuckle under and do things our way.

12. Having had a complete physical, emotional and spiritual breakdown as a result of these steps, we tried to blame others and to get sympathy and pity in all our affairs.

Submitted by Jeanne S.

Peace,

Tyler

ChrisMan · 04-15-2005, 03:43 PM

Thanx Tyler. Very funny!

splendra · 04-15-2005, 03:47 PM

yep... that was me to a tee before i went into recovery...

Evanna · 04-15-2005, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tyler

12 Steps of Pre-Program

1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing- that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us.

2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and the rest of the world was insane.

3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills and lives over to our care even though they couldn't understand us at all.

Tyler

Oh dear, two and a half years later and i still live my life by these three steps!

Dan · 04-15-2005, 05:10 PM

Of all the 12 step satire I've seen, that's one of the funniest yet

Thanks Tyler.

HPierce · 04-15-2005, 05:51 PM

Hahahaha That Is Veryyyyyyyy Funnyy!!!

Ama · 04-15-2005, 06:35 PM

We sometimes just gotta laugh .......Thankz 4 Thiz!

SelfSeeking · 08-25-2008, 11:01 AM

Bump!

doorknob · 08-25-2008, 11:10 AM

(((((( Tyler ))))))

SelfSeeking · 08-25-2008, 11:21 AM

Gosh, a twelve-step program I've mastered without even trying! Go ME!

LogCabin · 08-25-2008, 11:31 AM

LOL! You mean I was even thinking before I found AA? I can't remember.....

**Rowan** · 08-25-2008, 11:35 AM

I thought Tyler was back but see this is an old thread of his. Too bad, I miss him.

04-15-2005, 02:53 PM	#1 (permalink)
tyler Not all better, getting better Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Getting back to the beach!!!!!! :-) Posts: 781	12 Steps before you work the 12 Steps (Funny) 12 Steps of Pre-Program 1. We admitted we were powerless over nothing- that we could manage our lives perfectly and those of anyone else who would allow us. 2. Came to believe there was no power greater than ourselves and the rest of the world was insane. 3. Made a decision to have our loved ones and friends turn their wills and lives over to our care even though they couldn't understand us at all. 4. Made a searching and fearless moral and immoral inventory of everyone we knew. 5. Admitted to the whole world at large the exact nature of everyone else's wrongs. 6. Were entirely ready to make others straighten up and do right. 7. Demanded others to either "shape up or ship out." 8. Made a list of all persons who had harmed us and became willing to go to any lengths to get even with them all. 9. Got direct revenge wherever possible. Except when to do so would cost us our own lives or at least a stiff jail sentence. 10. Continued to take the inventory of others and when they were wrong promptly and repeatedly told them about it. 11. Sought through bitching, complaining, and nagging to improve our relations with others as we couldn't understand them at all, asking only that they knuckle under and do things our way. 12. Having had a complete physical, emotional and spiritual breakdown as a result of these steps, we tried to blame others and to get sympathy and pity in all our affairs. Submitted by Jeanne S. Peace, Tyler __________________ Peace and Love, Tyler Heck is where people go who don't believe in Gosh "Protest is the highest form of democracy." Gen. Wesley Clark "Meat is food, veggies are food's food!" -pedagogue

04-15-2005, 03:43 PM	#2 (permalink)
ChrisMan Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Boston, MA Posts: 398	Thanx Tyler. Very funny! __________________ "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." -- Philo

04-15-2005, 03:47 PM	#3 (permalink)
splendra the girl can't help it Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: splendraville Posts: 4,817 Blog Entries: 3	yep... that was me to a tee before i went into recovery... __________________ nice has a hisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

04-15-2005, 05:51 PM	#6 (permalink)
HPierce Meetings Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Detroit, Michigan Posts: 376	Hahahaha That Is Veryyyyyyyy Funnyy!!! __________________ Alcoholism is the only disease that tries to convince you that you don’t have it. If you wonder if you’re an addict or alcoholic, you probably are.

04-15-2005, 06:35 PM	#7 (permalink)
Ama Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Dubh Linn - Ireland Posts: 455	We sometimes just gotta laugh .......Thankz 4 Thiz! __________________ Luvs and Recovery Ama "The only way to compel man to speak Good of you, is to do Good......" Voltaire

04-15-2005, 05:10 PM	#5 (permalink)
Dan Member Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 8,753	Of all the 12 step satire I've seen, that's one of the funniest yet Thanks Tyler.

08-25-2008, 11:01 AM	#8 (permalink)
SelfSeeking Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Connecticut Posts: 906 Blog Entries: 2	Bump!

08-25-2008, 11:10 AM	#9 (permalink)
doorknob Feeling Orange Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Davenport, WA Posts: 2,299	(((((( Tyler )))))) __________________

08-25-2008, 11:21 AM	#10 (permalink)
SelfSeeking Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: Connecticut Posts: 906 Blog Entries: 2	Gosh, a twelve-step program I've mastered without even trying! Go ME!

08-25-2008, 11:31 AM	#11 (permalink)
LogCabin Seriously Fun! Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: California coast Posts: 418	LOL! You mean I was even thinking before I found AA? I can't remember..... __________________ *Sober since May 10, 2008*

08-25-2008, 11:35 AM	#12 (permalink)
Rowan Lucky Cracka Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 9,027 Blog Entries: 1	I thought Tyler was back but see this is an old thread of his. Too bad, I miss him. __________________ *Christmas is cancelled.*

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