New on board

[DarkenedAngel]

Hi,
My name is LeAndra you can call me Andi if you want. My dad has been an alcoholic/narcotic as long as I can remember but a couple of years ago in november (when I was in the 7th grade I believe..I lose track) I got baptised, and my dad had to bad of a hangover to be able to attend. That jarred him and he went to a rehab in flordia. He's been "recovering" for 2 years now and goes to A.A meetings often. I'm 15 and a Sophmore in high school. My dad still has the personality defects that alcohol has...most of the time it's like he has a permanent hangover...except he gets up and walks around in a bad mood instead of laying in bed and yelling at us. I'm having a lot of trouble forgiving him for all of the stuff he's put my family through..and I've been really depressed for a few years, but my mother doesn't believe in depression so there's nothing I can do about it. I need people to talk to, and I need help and I can help people back. I know this is a long post so I'll stop talking now..most of you have had the same things happen I'm sure, abuse and all that jazz..so yeah.

[liveweyerd]

Welcome, we are glad you found us.
There will be people far wiser than I am around here soon. Keep coming back, make yourself at home.
There is alot of great information at the tops of all the forums called power posts.
Is there a chance you could get to an al-ateen meeting?
I am also concerned about the depression. Can you talk to a school counselor or someone who has some clout to get you to a Doctor?
Depression is a real illness.
Maybe your mom believes in unicorns.
Sorry. That was rude.
But it makes me mad that your health is being neglected because she doesn't believe in it.
It is real and we have special forums here for that too.
Again, welcome, you have found many new friends here who will believe you and support you.
I look forward to getting to know you.

[CAPTAINZING2000]

Some of these posts slide under the wire I'll make sure this doesn't None of us got here because of our families being Like Leave it to Beaver. I started partying really hard at your age. Most everyone knows what you're going through in here. There is support here. We do care about you. When, you have a problem post on here. we have a saying a problem shared is half repaired. There are some fine ladies on here that can and will try and help you.
Keep postin wuith us ok

chris

[Chy]

Welcome Andi we're glad your here. Visit our Friends and Family, RAPS, and Naranon forums as well. Have you ever tried Ala-teen? Great support group for teens! Hope to see you often.

[sickk&tired]

Welcome Andi!! I'm so sorry that you're going through such a rough time. Alcoholism is a terrible illness, it affects you and those you love. The other members who have posted are right, you should try to find an ala-teen meeting. No one will understand what you're going through like others in your place. ESPECIALLY other peers in your place! You'll be amazed at the love and support you will feel.

I found this site for some meetings in your area:

http://www.theagapecenter.com/AlAnoninUSA/Kentucky.htm

I encourage you to try it out, and let us know how it goes :-).

[DarkenedAngel]

thank you all so much, my dad goes to meetings, but there's only one ala-teen meeting in Lexington and it's on sundays when I have to be at church. I've tried before. My mom kinda keeps putting things off on getting me into meetings and stuff. But thanks so much for the support.

[Peaches04]

Welcome Andi...my dad was what some might consider to be a "dry" drunk. He was selfish, narcissistic, and abusive at times. You are not alone, and you'd be surprised how many other people (probably some of your close friends) have the same problem you do. When I look back on my childhood and my friends, I struggle to even think of one who had a "normal" life. The things I would keep in mind are that first and foremost - it has nothing to do with YOU. YOU could be absolutely perfect in every way, and he would still treat you the way he does, becuase this is all about HIM. You did not cause it and you are a valuable and precious child - that he does not or can not see that, is a great loss to him. Please know that... We are all here for you and can certainly relate. You have nothing, and I mean nothing, to be ashamed of or feel guilty about...you have been put in a bad situation, you didn't ask for it! I think it's fabulous that you have the courage to seek help and support - and I hope we can help alleviate some of your fears and disappointments. God bless you sweetie!
This is a difficult disease to understand for us that are much older than you, so I can't imagine trying to translate this all at 15 years old...although, you are much wiser than I was at that age. I lived in secrecy and shame, and just assumed it was normal to have people you love treat you like crap. I'm paying the price for that belief now - so, I pray you will listen to these wise people and gain some knowledge and understanding. I wish I could give you a great big hug right now... it will all be okay in the end sweetie, because of your strength and your actions, regardless of what he does! He can't take away your happiness and your dignity, if you don't let him. I know that's hard to understand now, but it's true.

[ChrisMan]

Hi Andi!

Welcome and I would like to second the advice already given. Hope you find the support you need and feel free to post here anytime.

:xmasf

ChrisMan

[In memory of miracle]

Welcome to SR.I am thinking what a heavy burden for you to haveto bear.You know Andee alcoholism is a 3 fold disease,physical,mental and spiritual.Some of us get physically well but dont change,that makes for what we call a "dry drunk" and we can get pretty miserable and that misery is sadly as contagious as active drinking.Please know your fathers drinking and his behavior is NOT your fault,tell yourself that every time he acts up.You can let go of him by taking the focus off him and putting it on yourself and your life.Make good choices for yourself.Do sports,do well in school and keep yourself busy with positive things.I understand what your saying about being depressed,I grew up the same way,not talking about things.When I "stuffed" my feelings because I had no out let I also got deppressed,for me it was a lot of anger turned inward.Perhaps you can find a caring counsler in school or church.Dont be afraid to let the cat out of the bag.You deserve to have a happy life,sounds like you have been through enough.Bless you sweetie,I am glad you are here..Trish