Drinking again.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
I love guzzling wine
what is about the wine guzzle that you "love"? there's a lot more involved that the wine going down the throat - there is everything ELSE that brought you here to SR. lack of control, house and finances in disarray, sketchy people in your life, general abject misery.
you seem to have a very passive or meek demeanor - thus perhaps why you are so easily influenced by the predatory neighbor and why you have not yet mounted a successful run at recovery. you "give in" - choose the easier softer way.
recovery is damn hard work. it doesn't happen without our full participation and commitment. the program of AA can certainly be a vehicle for change, but you will need to dedicate yourself to it. and that's more than making a meeting now and then.
what is about the wine guzzle that you "love"? there's a lot more involved that the wine going down the throat - there is everything ELSE that brought you here to SR. lack of control, house and finances in disarray, sketchy people in your life, general abject misery.
you seem to have a very passive or meek demeanor - thus perhaps why you are so easily influenced by the predatory neighbor and why you have not yet mounted a successful run at recovery. you "give in" - choose the easier softer way.
recovery is damn hard work. it doesn't happen without our full participation and commitment. the program of AA can certainly be a vehicle for change, but you will need to dedicate yourself to it. and that's more than making a meeting now and then.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
I'm not sure its about being passive or weak. In any case they're not very constructive terms IMO.
I know as a drinker I had so little self esteem that I sought external validation all the time - how other people treated me determined my worth...
but I got more self confident when I stayed sober and started to rely more on my own internal compass for validation.
Not having to dig myself out of financial crises every fortnight helped a lot too.
I think you do have the strength in you Sweetichick - it's time to start using it again
D
I know as a drinker I had so little self esteem that I sought external validation all the time - how other people treated me determined my worth...
but I got more self confident when I stayed sober and started to rely more on my own internal compass for validation.
Not having to dig myself out of financial crises every fortnight helped a lot too.
I think you do have the strength in you Sweetichick - it's time to start using it again
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
sorry Dee, i didn't use the term WEAK, i said meek - sweetichick has shared getting literally mowed over by this across the street "friend" and talked about a bad experience with a woman from AA many years ago who took advantage of her. i meant in general as a gentle soul who struggles to be pro-active and is easily swayed or distracted.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
Sorry - my eyesights not the best.
I do appreciate the point I think you're trying to make - it just struck me it might be expressed more positively, and with a little more personal experience.
No harm no foul
D
I do appreciate the point I think you're trying to make - it just struck me it might be expressed more positively, and with a little more personal experience.
No harm no foul
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 47
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I'm not sure its about being passive or weak. In any case they're not very constructive terms IMO.
I know as a drinker I had so little self esteem that I sought external validation all the time - how other people treated me determined my worth...
but I got more self confident when I stayed sober and started to rely more on my own internal compass for validation.
Not having to dig myself out of financial crises every fortnight helped a lot too.
I think you do have the strength in you Sweetichick - it's time to start using it again
D
I know as a drinker I had so little self esteem that I sought external validation all the time - how other people treated me determined my worth...
but I got more self confident when I stayed sober and started to rely more on my own internal compass for validation.
Not having to dig myself out of financial crises every fortnight helped a lot too.
I think you do have the strength in you Sweetichick - it's time to start using it again
D
DOS: 08-16-2012
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: Central Iowa
Posts: 365
I will tell you what my sponsor told me before I stopped drinking. I hope that soon you encounter enough pain in life that you will find the desperation you need to go to any lengths it takes to get sober and to change your life.
After he told me that, it took the better part of a year and almost killing myself before I found the desperation to shut up, listen, and do as someone I trusted more than myself asked me to do. I hope that soon happens for you.
After he told me that, it took the better part of a year and almost killing myself before I found the desperation to shut up, listen, and do as someone I trusted more than myself asked me to do. I hope that soon happens for you.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 47
Originally Posted by hellrzr
I will tell you what my sponsor told me before I stopped drinking. I hope that soon you encounter enough pain in life that you will find the desperation you need to go to any lengths it takes to get sober and to change your life.
After he told me that, it took the better part of a year and almost killing myself before I found the desperation to shut up, listen, and do as someone I trusted more than myself asked me to do. I hope that soon happens for you.
After he told me that, it took the better part of a year and almost killing myself before I found the desperation to shut up, listen, and do as someone I trusted more than myself asked me to do. I hope that soon happens for you.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
Thanks to all who replied. I'm not meek maybe a bit passive. I will be more careful about what I share on here. I'm glad I dumped the wine Tuesday.
I saw my psychiatrist. He was unhelpful and just checked my medication. He's definitely not a therapist. He never even asked how my drinking was.
This thread kept me sober the last two days. I still freak out at the thought of. AA and a sponsor. A lot of things freak me out.
My health still isn't great. I'm so fat and unfit. Time to fix that. I didn't notice so much when I was drinking. At least I am not dead.
I saw my psychiatrist. He was unhelpful and just checked my medication. He's definitely not a therapist. He never even asked how my drinking was.
This thread kept me sober the last two days. I still freak out at the thought of. AA and a sponsor. A lot of things freak me out.
My health still isn't great. I'm so fat and unfit. Time to fix that. I didn't notice so much when I was drinking. At least I am not dead.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Where there's life there's hope.
Honestly. I freaked out about the idea of a sponsor. So much so it took me about six month in AA to ask someone to be it. Lol. But it was such a flippin relief when I finally cracked on with it.
Be gentle with yourself re the weight . One thing at a time. Have a boogie housework session a few times a week. Your favourite oldies blaring out and some elbow grease. Fitness and a fresh gaff all in one .
Not all psychologists are up on addiction. Maybe it's worth changing to one who is.
Take care. BB
Honestly. I freaked out about the idea of a sponsor. So much so it took me about six month in AA to ask someone to be it. Lol. But it was such a flippin relief when I finally cracked on with it.
Be gentle with yourself re the weight . One thing at a time. Have a boogie housework session a few times a week. Your favourite oldies blaring out and some elbow grease. Fitness and a fresh gaff all in one .
Not all psychologists are up on addiction. Maybe it's worth changing to one who is.
Take care. BB
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by sweetichick
I still freak out at the thought of. AA and a sponsor. A lot of things freak me out.
fear=
**** Everything And Run
or
Face EVERYTHING And Recover.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by sweetichick
I got to day 5 and because it was payday I bought wine. AA was good. I don't think that there is any hope for me. I love guzzling wine. Seeing my shrink tomorrow to see if he can help.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,802
That was nice of you all ..asking how I am. I believe we can all find the strength to keep going if we support each other. I'm feeling positive today. It's just getting triggered by something that will cause me a problem. Maybe it's too late to undo some of my health concerns. I hope not. But I will never know till I have been sober for a while.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,502
Sweetichick, I am so glad you are back and feeling better. You simply must not give up because this disease is relentless. I hope that your health concerns diminish and hopefully clear up with your sobriety. We are here for you, so please know you have support.
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