Day 2 Blues

[HiImDee]

Morning Everyone,
I made it through Day 1. It was the worst night's sleep ever. I have for so long (until last night) slept like a baby ~ a nice drug induced sleep. Now, it's Day 2 and I feel like I have been run over by a truck. My head is hurting so bad I swer my eyeballs are about to bust!! The worst part for me this moment in regards to dealing with all these physical symptoms is knowing that a pain pill would make them all go away. I'm NOT going to take anything (made sure I had nothing available...just in case) but my mind will not stop reminding me how great I would feel if I could just take something!!!! UGH!!!!!!! I know how hard these first days are going to be but I'm afriad they are going to be even harder than I imagined.
I keep reading post where people are stating how GREAT they feel now that they are clean and sober and I feel so happy for them.....all the while wondering how in the heck you get to that point!!!!!!!!!
One day at a time .................today, it may just have to be one hour at a time.
Thanks for listening. I think you are all such a great group of people and your stories inspire me. I'll be reading a lot of them today.

Dee :headache:

[ham]

Hi Dee,

I am proud of you for getting to day 2!
I will pray for you to feel better.

ham

[lonlion]

Good Morning Dee; I know how you feel when you hear that people have overcome this and that and been strong, and we think, I wish I could be that srong. We think that they are unique and we are just not capable. I think a lot of us went through that. I remember the last time I got clean, over 40 days ago, I cried and said "I can't do this!" I'm just not as strong as those other people.
I still think about how it feels to be buzzed, how good it would be to get some and just do it. I battle that harder some days than others. I also remember the first couple weeks going with 2-3 hours sleep. I don't want to have to go through that all over again, so I am staying clean, for that and so many more reasons.
There really is happiness on the other side of splat! You are stronger than you think Dee, you can do this. We are here to support you and we care about you and your recovery. In the beginning one day at a time should maybe be one minute or hour at a time. If thats the way you have to do it, so be it! I can see in your words your desire to overcome this, and thats great! Keep us posted, even if its every hour.
Love Diana

[HiImDee]

THANK YOU Ham. I'm so glad your husband has a good first day at rehab and may each day get better for him so that he can get better, feel better, GET WELL and come back home to you!!!!
Thanks a bunch Diana, for your words. They help me greatly. I DO desire to kick this evil addiction and I have to believe that there are happier healthier days ahead. I'm just really realizing that the mental part of this is going to be so much tougher than getting through the physical part of it all!!!!!!
Thanks again,
Dee

[hopealwayz]

Dee,
Just an hour or minute at a time. Keep posting here often. Drink lots of water. You are very strong and can do this! Remember that we are all here for you.

Hope

[sherbear5104]

Hi Dee,
Congrats on your 2nd day. Sorry you're not feeling so well, but this too shall pass. Maybe a hot bath would make you feel a little better. Definately drink lots of water and try to eat. You could also try taking vitamins. I will say a prayer for you. Hang in there, it does get better.

Sherry

[cj.]

Congrats on your day clean!! That is one big miracle!!

I know full well the pains of withdrawal, both physically and mentally, and I want you to know that I am sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.

You CAN do this!!

cj

[Dan]

Originally Posted by HiImDee

I'm just really realizing that the mental part of this is going to be so much tougher than getting through the physical part of it all!!!!!!

You just nailed it Dee!
The physical withdrawal, although sometimes nasty and very not pleasant, is really insignificant compared to what we have to do in order to better understand what drives us to use and drink.
Obsession and compulsion. Unless we can have an honest look at ourselves and how these two things operate inside our minds, we're going to have a very tough time.
And remember. You're responsible for your recovery. Not your addiction.
Keep on keeping on!

[3legacy]

((((((((Dee))))))))))

The worst part for me this moment in regards to dealing with all these physical symptoms is knowing that a pain pill would make them all go away.

I thought so at one time but realized the physical symptoms & pain would not really go away....... They are temporarily hidden and yet increase in intensity so that I need more and more of the pill(or liquid solution) that keeps me getting sicker and sicker.

You are in my thoughts and prayers,
Three Legs

[HiImDee]

thanks Hope, Sherry, cj, Dan and Three Legs. I'm SO SO thankful I found this site before going through this withdrawl process. I'm taking everyone's advice.......drinking lots of water, trying to eat, took a hot bath and trying NOT to look too far down the road right now and just concentrate on TODAY!!!!
Dan...........I've been taking a good look at myself for awhile now and have just only recently realized how this current pain pill addiction I have is only one in a long line of compulsive/addictive problems/behaviors that have been in my life for years and years. I don't know why I have never stopped and realized before that I DO HAVE and have had addiction problems for so long time but at least now, I do realize it and I am willingly to admit it and most importantly, I am ready to seek help to do something about it all.
Thanks again guys

[sherbear5104]

Dee

It sounds like you are off to a good start. Admitting is the first step. That and reaching out for help. Keep your head up, and live in today!

Sherry