when we really open the door...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
when we really open the door...
I was good at keeping the door closed
I looked at the evidence and I explained it away
I was like 'everyone else', I was just 'unlucky'
It was someone else's fault
I couldn't really be THAT bad
I had a lot going for me
I was smart, employed, a leader, well-liked, had money and success....
And so the door stayed closed
I really would't even go near it for a long, long time
Secretly, somewhere along the way, I crept close
I listened at the door
I wondered if what some said were really true
Was I a guy who should walk through it?
Surely not.... That was for others
So without telling anyone else, I set out to prove it
Days, weeks, attempted months
Small successes at showing myself
"See!! I can stop anytime. That door isn't for me!!!"
And I rode those successes
Through the treacherous roiling waters
Of more violently-obvious evidence
The day finally came, my back against a wall
My behavior, my denial, my secrecy
It all caught up with me
It was me, before the door
My family, the Law, The looming consequences
All pushed me toward it.... "Take the handle and open it - or else"
It was despair and defeat and the lack of any other real choice
At least, it was that at first
I stepped up, opened the door - just enough to walk past the threshold
Into a room of tables and friendly faces
I still wasn't convinced
But I went through that door
And instead of arguing, I listened
It wasn't my last attempt to run
In fact, I tried to close the door again
Tried my very best to prove it wrong - one more time
But you see, once that door is open sincerely
It really cannot be closed
And bit by bit, the voice deeper down came through
"That door is the way.... please.... let's go toward that light..."
I pushed it back open, this time all the way
I stepped through and I said loud and clear
"I still don't like it!!! But from now on, I'M HERE!!!"
I asked for help, sometimes every day
Sometimes it was wonderful, sometimes dismal
But I kept it open, stepping further through every time
Until one day I noticed.....
Seemingly without my awareness
That door had closed behind me
Ahead of me lay a vast expanse
Of green and light and color - golden possibility
Depth and Love and Freedom
And back there behind the door, now locked securely away
Darkness contained, those fangs of despair left behind
And all because I really opened that door.
I looked at the evidence and I explained it away
I was like 'everyone else', I was just 'unlucky'
It was someone else's fault
I couldn't really be THAT bad
I had a lot going for me
I was smart, employed, a leader, well-liked, had money and success....
And so the door stayed closed
I really would't even go near it for a long, long time
Secretly, somewhere along the way, I crept close
I listened at the door
I wondered if what some said were really true
Was I a guy who should walk through it?
Surely not.... That was for others
So without telling anyone else, I set out to prove it
Days, weeks, attempted months
Small successes at showing myself
"See!! I can stop anytime. That door isn't for me!!!"
And I rode those successes
Through the treacherous roiling waters
Of more violently-obvious evidence
The day finally came, my back against a wall
My behavior, my denial, my secrecy
It all caught up with me
It was me, before the door
My family, the Law, The looming consequences
All pushed me toward it.... "Take the handle and open it - or else"
It was despair and defeat and the lack of any other real choice
At least, it was that at first
I stepped up, opened the door - just enough to walk past the threshold
Into a room of tables and friendly faces
I still wasn't convinced
But I went through that door
And instead of arguing, I listened
It wasn't my last attempt to run
In fact, I tried to close the door again
Tried my very best to prove it wrong - one more time
But you see, once that door is open sincerely
It really cannot be closed
And bit by bit, the voice deeper down came through
"That door is the way.... please.... let's go toward that light..."
I pushed it back open, this time all the way
I stepped through and I said loud and clear
"I still don't like it!!! But from now on, I'M HERE!!!"
I asked for help, sometimes every day
Sometimes it was wonderful, sometimes dismal
But I kept it open, stepping further through every time
Until one day I noticed.....
Seemingly without my awareness
That door had closed behind me
Ahead of me lay a vast expanse
Of green and light and color - golden possibility
Depth and Love and Freedom
And back there behind the door, now locked securely away
Darkness contained, those fangs of despair left behind
And all because I really opened that door.
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 740
Wow. You describe it all so eloquently and so accurately, FreeOwl. Especially this part:
I pushed it back open, this time all the way
I stepped through and I said loud and clear
"I still don't like it!!! But from now on, I'M HERE!!!"
Your posts are amazing.
Delfin
I pushed it back open, this time all the way
I stepped through and I said loud and clear
"I still don't like it!!! But from now on, I'M HERE!!!"
Your posts are amazing.
Delfin
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 561
Originally Posted by FreeOwl 
But you see, once that door is open sincerely
It really cannot be closed
And bit by bit, the voice deeper down came through
"That door is the way....
That door had closed behind me
Ahead of me lay a vast expanse
Of green and light and color - golden possibility
Depth and Love and Freedom
And back there behind the door, now locked securely away
Darkness contained, those fangs of despair left behind
It really cannot be closed
And bit by bit, the voice deeper down came through
"That door is the way....
That door had closed behind me
Ahead of me lay a vast expanse
Of green and light and color - golden possibility
Depth and Love and Freedom
And back there behind the door, now locked securely away
Darkness contained, those fangs of despair left behind
These are AMAZING lines. And such a great analogy with the door. I'm experiencing the first few lines right now. Love it, FreeOwl!
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