Need help
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Need help
Hello everyone,
I have lurked about here before but finally got brave enough to post.
I really, really need to quit drinking. I never have drank everyday, and stay relative fit, and don't smoke, but I have begun to find myself going on drinking benders in the last few months, lasting a few days, after which I'm sweating and ill and taking days to recover. I'm lucky to not be working at present so I can afford the time to recover, but this is a terrible way to live.
I caused pain not only to myself to my family and loved ones too, I cannot live this way any more and am desperate to change.
I have bought a couple of books about recovery and intend to really use this great site.
Thanks in advance for any help and advice and support you can offer me.
My quit date is officially today, 23rd July 2014 (my last drink was yesterday lunchtime, almost exactly 24 hours ago here in the UK.
I have lurked about here before but finally got brave enough to post.
I really, really need to quit drinking. I never have drank everyday, and stay relative fit, and don't smoke, but I have begun to find myself going on drinking benders in the last few months, lasting a few days, after which I'm sweating and ill and taking days to recover. I'm lucky to not be working at present so I can afford the time to recover, but this is a terrible way to live.
I caused pain not only to myself to my family and loved ones too, I cannot live this way any more and am desperate to change.
I have bought a couple of books about recovery and intend to really use this great site.
Thanks in advance for any help and advice and support you can offer me.
My quit date is officially today, 23rd July 2014 (my last drink was yesterday lunchtime, almost exactly 24 hours ago here in the UK.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 383
Hi awholenewlife,
Welcome to the support forums - you've made a great decision in wanting to cut ethanol out of your life. In addition to this site and your books, it is also a good idea to seek some sort of treatment which holds us personally accountable - in other words, something involving looking into the eyes of someone else who cares and being able to speak with them about the addiction and the help you need.
When I was trying to quit early on, when my motivation levels were high staying sober was easy. As long as we aren't in the latter stages of alcoholism the physical part of withdrawal is manageable. What we have to be mindful of is our own mind working against us, and this happens when our motivation levels go low. When you are melancholy or angry about things in your life are times when motivation to stay sober can drop, so keep an eye on that.
This site and books are both very good tools in your toolbag for sobriety, but both share this in common: If you don't feel like opening the book one day, it won't open for you, and if you don't feel like logging in, you don't have to. One thing you will hear a lot in recovery is how alcohol is "cunning, baffling and powerful." That's true - so if you can add another tool to your toolbag, like a support group or a counselor who will hold you accountable to check in every once in a while, it can really help you when you hit low points of motivation, which generally happens in early recovery. Of course it's still always up to you, and right now you're in a good place and have made a very difficult decision which everyone here can appreciate
Welcome to the support forums - you've made a great decision in wanting to cut ethanol out of your life. In addition to this site and your books, it is also a good idea to seek some sort of treatment which holds us personally accountable - in other words, something involving looking into the eyes of someone else who cares and being able to speak with them about the addiction and the help you need.
When I was trying to quit early on, when my motivation levels were high staying sober was easy. As long as we aren't in the latter stages of alcoholism the physical part of withdrawal is manageable. What we have to be mindful of is our own mind working against us, and this happens when our motivation levels go low. When you are melancholy or angry about things in your life are times when motivation to stay sober can drop, so keep an eye on that.
This site and books are both very good tools in your toolbag for sobriety, but both share this in common: If you don't feel like opening the book one day, it won't open for you, and if you don't feel like logging in, you don't have to. One thing you will hear a lot in recovery is how alcohol is "cunning, baffling and powerful." That's true - so if you can add another tool to your toolbag, like a support group or a counselor who will hold you accountable to check in every once in a while, it can really help you when you hit low points of motivation, which generally happens in early recovery. Of course it's still always up to you, and right now you're in a good place and have made a very difficult decision which everyone here can appreciate
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Thanks for the welcome!
I SO need to do this, I cannot live like this anymore.
I couldn't sleep most of last night and lay there with my heart racing, sweating, panicking. Ugh, I cannot live like this anymore. I kidded myself for a long time that because I didn't do it all the time and had long breaks in between where I didn't touch a drop, that it was fine. But I realise it is so not fine. And health-wise I seem (hope) to have got away with it so far, but I can't keep pushing my luck, I may not keep getting away with it. I should really go to my GP and make him aware, get some blood tests maybe.
I'm SO much happier in my periods of not drinking, I KNOW this. I have to make this stick this time.
I will be posting all the time on here in a bid to sort this once and for all. Thanks again for the warm welcome. X
I SO need to do this, I cannot live like this anymore.
I couldn't sleep most of last night and lay there with my heart racing, sweating, panicking. Ugh, I cannot live like this anymore. I kidded myself for a long time that because I didn't do it all the time and had long breaks in between where I didn't touch a drop, that it was fine. But I realise it is so not fine. And health-wise I seem (hope) to have got away with it so far, but I can't keep pushing my luck, I may not keep getting away with it. I should really go to my GP and make him aware, get some blood tests maybe.
I'm SO much happier in my periods of not drinking, I KNOW this. I have to make this stick this time.
I will be posting all the time on here in a bid to sort this once and for all. Thanks again for the warm welcome. X
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Thanks, Climber122. I have thought about extra support.....
A counsellor might be the best fit for me, I think. I've read lots into different methods, and I don't think AA would be for me for various reasons, although I have a copy of the Big Book which I find very comforting to read late at night when I'm sober. So something obviously resonates there.
I've looked into SMART meetings and there are some here in my part of the UK, but not many and not handy to get to for me at all. And I don't think there's any Women for Sobriety in the UK, though I could be wrong (I liked what I read online about that).
I will think about what you said, thanks for the advice. I may like I said even just go and talk to my doctor again (I'm in the UK so can go and see my GP for free as often as I like.....well, when one can get an appointment, lol). My GP is great and I know he would happily be a person for me to check in with. I'm just always slightly worried, as many are, about these things being all over my medical records (I know they are private, but still, argh!).
I'm going to try to keep holding on what I keep reading on here and on other sobriety sites about sobriety being SO worth it, if you can just stick with it, that it takes at least 90 days to really start feeling the overwhelming benefits. While I've never drank everyday, I've never in my adult life given it as long as the likes of 90 or 100 days without drinking, I'm talking maybe 20 or so days at any given time sober.
Lots to think about, here. Thanks again.
A counsellor might be the best fit for me, I think. I've read lots into different methods, and I don't think AA would be for me for various reasons, although I have a copy of the Big Book which I find very comforting to read late at night when I'm sober. So something obviously resonates there.
I've looked into SMART meetings and there are some here in my part of the UK, but not many and not handy to get to for me at all. And I don't think there's any Women for Sobriety in the UK, though I could be wrong (I liked what I read online about that).
I will think about what you said, thanks for the advice. I may like I said even just go and talk to my doctor again (I'm in the UK so can go and see my GP for free as often as I like.....well, when one can get an appointment, lol). My GP is great and I know he would happily be a person for me to check in with. I'm just always slightly worried, as many are, about these things being all over my medical records (I know they are private, but still, argh!).
I'm going to try to keep holding on what I keep reading on here and on other sobriety sites about sobriety being SO worth it, if you can just stick with it, that it takes at least 90 days to really start feeling the overwhelming benefits. While I've never drank everyday, I've never in my adult life given it as long as the likes of 90 or 100 days without drinking, I'm talking maybe 20 or so days at any given time sober.
Lots to think about, here. Thanks again.
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Cypress Texas
Posts: 16
Welcome awholenewlife52. I am also new to this site. I just quite yesterday and woke up this morning feeling so much better. Like you I am so much happier in my periods of not drinking. WE have to stick to this. WE have family and loved ones that need us sober....and healthy. Climber122 says "cut ethanol out of your life".....wow. That really hit me. We can do this awholenewlife52. As I once read...we need to take this one day at a time. Today you and I are blessed to have this site, to have strangers like us who care and take the time to support us. WE are never alone. Big hug to you and stay strong!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Hi and welcome. It’s wonderful that you are trying to stop in the early stage of heavy drinking. Alcohol dependence is quite fast at times and more difficult to stop as time progresses.
You seem to have a needed ingredient and that’s being honest with yourself about your drinking and accepting that it’s happening.
I got involved with a worldwide fellowship to get and stay sober. There are a lot of programs that will work also IF we WORK them every day!
BE WELL
You seem to have a needed ingredient and that’s being honest with yourself about your drinking and accepting that it’s happening.
I got involved with a worldwide fellowship to get and stay sober. There are a lot of programs that will work also IF we WORK them every day!
BE WELL
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Thanks, Wellnessgirl.
It's so good read that I'm not the only one with the feelings, although I'm sorry for what brings us here. Let's do this, we can get well again.
What Climber said about cutting ethanol out of our lives struck me too....that's a very powerful way of putting it.
It's so good read that I'm not the only one with the feelings, although I'm sorry for what brings us here. Let's do this, we can get well again.
What Climber said about cutting ethanol out of our lives struck me too....that's a very powerful way of putting it.
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
awholenewlife52,
After many, many, many years of alcohol abuse and attempts at just quitting on my own I realized for me it was impossible by myself. The same sick mind that convinced me to drink could not get me sober!
Group support and asking others for help and God's grace is what has gotten me to 45 days of sobriety. It sounds like you have the willingness and desire which is critical to start with. I was really hesitant to go to AA - really? Isn't that just a big pity party?
Well, for me I believe it put me on the path that hopefully will keep me sober. A sense of spirituality for many is also foundational. It does not have to be God as many define, but simple acknowledgement of a higher power however YOU define it. Our group has Christians, agnostics and atheists.
We come together in the fellowship of spirituality to KEEP US SOBER!
Prayers for you my friend - if you are willing I am convinced anyone can overcome!!
Peace brother.......
After many, many, many years of alcohol abuse and attempts at just quitting on my own I realized for me it was impossible by myself. The same sick mind that convinced me to drink could not get me sober!
Group support and asking others for help and God's grace is what has gotten me to 45 days of sobriety. It sounds like you have the willingness and desire which is critical to start with. I was really hesitant to go to AA - really? Isn't that just a big pity party?
Well, for me I believe it put me on the path that hopefully will keep me sober. A sense of spirituality for many is also foundational. It does not have to be God as many define, but simple acknowledgement of a higher power however YOU define it. Our group has Christians, agnostics and atheists.
We come together in the fellowship of spirituality to KEEP US SOBER!
Prayers for you my friend - if you are willing I am convinced anyone can overcome!!
Peace brother.......
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Thanks again for the welcomes and advice, everyone. It really is appreciated.
I have been reading one of my sobriety books this afternoon, Jason Vale's 'Kick the Drink Easily.' Has anyone else read this, what did you think if so?
I have been reading one of my sobriety books this afternoon, Jason Vale's 'Kick the Drink Easily.' Has anyone else read this, what did you think if so?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Hey Raider,
Thanks for your post. I'm doing OK, I'm in that very emotional, weepy stage of the first few days of sobriety, but this place has made me feel better, and like there's hope. My book that I've been reading is giving me hope, too.
Thanks for your post. I'm doing OK, I'm in that very emotional, weepy stage of the first few days of sobriety, but this place has made me feel better, and like there's hope. My book that I've been reading is giving me hope, too.
Guest
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Welcome. For me, allowing myself to remain open to whatever I may require to maintain sobriety is key. Creating any new major behavioural change requires time, energy and effort. Finding community here is a Godsend for me. Hearing someone else say "hey, me too!" is like oatmeal for my mind lol.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
this is a GREAT day!!!
It's a beautiful day to COMMIT TO SOBRIETY!!!! Go to the "It's a beautiful day to ____________ sober" thread and post that!!!
You've made a fantastic decision coming here and sharing your decision. We're here to help, encourage, participate in and witness your progression into a happier, fuller, more joyful existence.
You can do it.
It's a beautiful day to COMMIT TO SOBRIETY!!!! Go to the "It's a beautiful day to ____________ sober" thread and post that!!!
You've made a fantastic decision coming here and sharing your decision. We're here to help, encourage, participate in and witness your progression into a happier, fuller, more joyful existence.
You can do it.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Aw, thanks, Nuudawn and FreeOwl. Your posts mean a lot.
FreeOwl, your post made me laugh and cheered me up. I will do just that and go to the It's a beautiful day to _______ sober thread! We are having unusually hot and lovely weather here in the UK just now, so it is indeed a great day to be sober!
FreeOwl, your post made me laugh and cheered me up. I will do just that and go to the It's a beautiful day to _______ sober thread! We are having unusually hot and lovely weather here in the UK just now, so it is indeed a great day to be sober!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Earlier this year I took my first-ever SOBER trip to the UK. London is an entirely different experience when you're not wandering round in a haze of boozecloud.
It was St. Paddy's weekend.... while the rest of the place was going drunkencrazy, I was going for long runs through the city and relishing the blossoming life in the parks and the smell of spring....
It was St. Paddy's weekend.... while the rest of the place was going drunkencrazy, I was going for long runs through the city and relishing the blossoming life in the parks and the smell of spring....
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 313
Ah, that's great that you enjoyed London, it's a beautiful city. I've only been twice to London, I'd like to spend more time there. It's super-expensive compared to other parts of the UK, though.
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