it really is a simple program

[behind blue eyes]

so here i am, sitting at hom bored stiff on my pity pot. wasting away a beautiful day. trying to not let my disease getthe best of me. i called my sponsor and talked to him, i've spoken to other alcoholics, and now i'm here.

i'm a construction worker in ny, working at ground zero again. but two weeks ago i hurt my back. i should've been to the doctor then but i didn't. i ignored the problem and kept on working. very alcoholic behavior. well a week ago it became so bad i had to go out on disability. now i don't know if going to the doctor then would've prevented this, and now i'll never know. but i have to get on with today.

so what do i do? i sit here repeating poor me, i coulda done this, i should've done that. too late. it is what it is, and it's that way for a reason. but i know i wn't drink today because of it.

i did a very simple thing to get out of my stuff today. i called another alcoholic. it was that simple. the conversation turned to another acoholic who is going through some really bad times right now. i wn't go into detal but cancer is involved. this makes my back dilemma seem miniscule. so i pray for him and his family, and i'm out of my stuff. then i'm listening to a cd. it's amazing how things happen

i'm listening to the tommy album, i mentioned it the other day when i came back to sr. i had just hung up the phone, talked to my higher power about my friend and his problem, and the song *i'm free* is up next. here are the lyrics......

<center>I'm free
I'm free
And freedom tastes of reality

I'm free
I'm free
And I'm waiting for you to follow me

If I told you what it takes to reach the highest high
You'd laugh and say nothin's that simple
But you've been told many times before
Messiahs point you to the door
No one had the guts to leave the temple

I'm free
I'm free
And freedom tastes of reality

I'm free
I'm free
And I'm waiting for you... to follow me

How can we follow?
How can we follow?
Ooh.... </center>

i'm free alright, i'm free from my obsessions today, becase i had the guts to walk through the doors of AA and embrace what it had to offer. i'm free because because my messiah(whom i call howard) pointed me to the door and continues to guide me. i'm free because i can taste reality. i'm free because today i choose to help point the way to the newcomer, i'm waiting for you to follow me, just ask me how i did, i'll be glad to tell you.

my temple wasn't the bottle i sipped from, or the bar i bought it in. my temple was me. i was stuck in myself and didn't have the guts to leave.

Just keep your chin up!! :ilu

[eddie z.]

bbe,
Thank you so much for sharing that!! Does helping people, sharing with people, here on SR count? You've helped me. I think I've helped others here. I've gotten out of myself. Now if I can just get on the phone and out of my house! LOL.
Love, Eddie

[1Marty]

Thanks for that share! Great! It really sends the mesage! In order to lose the self pity and self centeredness, we must be helpful to others.