Class of April 2014 Part 2
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: AZ
Posts: 140
Originally Posted by lovemesomeokra 
Hey, Adna. Feel ya about the news. I'm usually a news junkie and post regularly on a progressive blog but I've had to back way off recently. I'm sure people are wondering where I went, but when I'm in a fragile place emotionally stories of the ailing world overwhelm me and make me much more prone to self-destructive thoughts and behavior. Maybe turn off the TV and the phone for a while and put on some tunes? Might even find yourself dancing. Oh, and I find it's really, really hard for me to be upbeat when I'm crazy tired. Really glad you're not feeling like using.
Here's a YouTube vid I found recently that really made me feel good. Maybe you'll like it, too.
Here's a YouTube vid I found recently that really made me feel good. Maybe you'll like it, too.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 684
MsOkra, Solitary, and Overwhelmed, thanks. It's actually the first time I've had it on since last week. Turning it off won't help now. This news hits a deep level of cultural terror common to most of my kind.
I need to learn to deal with whatever comes, looking away isn't all that different from trying to anesthetize myself. Life isn't always pretty or fair, and sometimes it's really hard, but it's real.
I need to learn to deal with whatever comes, looking away isn't all that different from trying to anesthetize myself. Life isn't always pretty or fair, and sometimes it's really hard, but it's real.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: AZ
Posts: 140
Originally Posted by SolitaryThinker
I don't even wanna drink today, I just wanna get out of this hole
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by overwhelmd
I'm glad you don't want to drink. You will get out. Keep moving forward. One minute at a time if you have to, just breathe and keep your mind occupied. Are you reading any books right now?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: AZ
Posts: 140
Originally Posted by Adnamaeel
MsOkra, Solitary, and Overwhelmed, thanks. It's actually the first time I've had it on since last week. Turning it off won't help now. This news hits a deep level of cultural terror common to most of my kind.
I need to learn to deal with whatever comes, looking away isn't all that different from trying to anesthetize myself. Life isn't always pretty or fair, and sometimes it's really hard, but it's real.
I need to learn to deal with whatever comes, looking away isn't all that different from trying to anesthetize myself. Life isn't always pretty or fair, and sometimes it's really hard, but it's real.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by Adnamaeel
MsOkra, Solitary, and Overwhelmed, thanks. It's actually the first time I've had it on since last week. Turning it off won't help now. This news hits a deep level of cultural terror common to most of my kind. I need to learn to deal with whatever comes, looking away isn't all that different from trying to anesthetize myself. Life isn't always pretty or fair, and sometimes it's really hard, but it's real.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: AZ
Posts: 140
Originally Posted by SolitaryThinker
I started a few and put them down, having a hard time keeping interest in them. I just wanna lay around and go to work, and that's what I did yesterday, I can't have that he every day. Not drinking is good but I can't be depressed every day. Part of the reason i partied so hard in the first place honestly.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 556
I am thanking God for this thread and my classmates here. You all are an encouragement. Today is the first day in five I will have a few hours to myself. I actually MUST shower, apply a face of sorts and do some errands. I have only a week left in AZ, so these errands are a necessity or I would remain here glued to these boards. I certainly don't trust myself. Wish me luck please. 
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by overwhelmd
Working is good. I think just anything to keep your mind occupied helps, at least for me. When I am alone and bored I am my own worst enemy.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Just thinking a lot and back to my general sadness, not an excuse to drink at all, but this was what I used to complain to my friends and family about all the time and nobody believes me. It's easier just being alone.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 556
Solitary, how about checking out YouTube speakers while you are cooking? I find most their perspective enlightening. BOB D from Vegas is my personal favorite. You might also want to find Teresa from Las Angeles- her story is tragic, but funny as all get out.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by StormiNormi
I am thanking God for this thread and my classmates here. You all are an encouragement. Today is the first day in five I will have a few hours to myself. I actually MUST shower, apply a face of sorts and do some errands. I have only a week left in AZ, so these errands are a necessity or I would remain here glued to these boards. I certainly don't trust myself. Wish me luck please.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by StormiNormi
Solitary, how about checking out YouTube speakers while you are cooking? I find most their perspective enlightening. BOB D from Vegas is my personal favorite. You might also want to find Teresa from Las Angeles- her story is tragic, but funny as all get out.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by SolitaryThinker
What is the name of the video I'm unsure what your referring to. Like the main video title?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Long Beach, NY
Posts: 2,317
Originally Posted by StormiNormi
SOLITARY; Bob D, Powerless over alcohol, step 1,
Well I decided what to do. Just a little more dive into my world first. Ok so, this girlfriend I constantly talk about, we were having a rough time when I first stopped drinking, but things have been smooth now. I love her with all my heart! She is my best friend and I really don't have any of those in life. There is nobody else in my. Life that I can open up to like her. She's always there when I'm crying like a big baby (which is almost every day lol) but she really is the driving force in my life. Now, although she is not an addict, she has her own issue and it's with food. She has her struggle with her weight and it's not just a few pounds, it's rather substantial. She was petrified that I was going to leave her for a prettier girl, and I told her 10000000 times how beautiful she is regardless of her size or shape. She can't believe how I am about this, and she told me "you are one of a kind Ryan, any others guy in the world would have left me in a second". It makes me feel good, but I'm being genuine and deep from the heart. I don't care how she looks she is an absolute sweetheart and I never met anyone like her in my life. I just want her to be healthy and with me as long as she possibly can! I'm an athletic guy and rather fit, I eat decently as well and she has been asking for my help, and I have been slacking. So instead of me wallowing and being sad all day, I invited her over for lunch and told her "it's gonna be healthy but your gonna love it,". I used to be a chef so I have a pretty good understanding of the kitchen. I cooked her fresh pepper cracked grilled chicken and made lettuce wraps with veggies, and tiny amount of cheese, and a fresh lite balsamic glaze drizzled over them, and a veggi soup with very little salt for her blood pressure issues. I have an extensive yoga and Zumba library that has been collecting dust, so were gonna do a light half hour yoga session to get her muscles moving. If I can't be happy myself, I'm at least gonna try and help the person that is always there when I'm down and out. Sorry for the mega long post, I'm just depressed as all hell, and like I said, other then her and you guys...I have nobody...thanks for listening and stay strong everyone <3
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 2 (0 members and 2 guests)
