Go Back   SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information > New to Addiction and Recovery? > Newcomers to Recovery
Forgot Password? Join Us!
Register Blogs FAQ Calendar Arcade Mark Forums Read Chat Room [5]


Welcome to the Sober Recovery Community

Already registered? Login above ---^
OR
To take advantage of all Posting, Chatting, Gaming, and all the features available at SoberRecovery, join the over 100,000 current members, and become a member of our supportive community today! Ads will no longer appear on the forums, once you register.



Reply
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 02-07-2014, 05:22 PM   #1 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 384
so what

So I messed up and am drinking again. Who the hell cares, really. This site is great as far as connecting with people, but there is nobody knocking on my door or calling me. I have tried to make this happen, but no change. I have shared at meetings, and almost begged people to pay attention to me, but ended up with nothing. I am a decent person, that has always put others' interests before mine, so I don't get this. I am not asking for much; a simple phone call to say hi or a knock on the door. I have bent over backwards to help people, and I don't regret this at all. I did the right thing. I'm thinking a trip to the ER would be a blessing, because the people there would show some kind of concern. It's a shame that you have to pay people to pretend they care. I went to an AA meeting today. If I expressed my concerns, all I would get is what I have heard before. Go to more meetings, get a sponser, read the big or the 12xt12 book. Connect with your spirituality. Volunteer for this or that. Been there and done that many times, only to end up in my apartment alone. Nobody cares. and nobody calls. All I am asking is for someone to do something to show they care. A simple phone call from someone asking how I am doing would make my day. ONE PERSON IS ALL IT WOULD TAKE. I would be one of the first people at an AA meeting to help people who need help. Not any more. All they want is what I have to offer. Helping me out is the last thing on their mind. Go to a meeting, and whip out a cigarette, and you have tons of "friends" asking for a smoke. Loan someone money, and you have tons of people that think you are a great person.
Unfortunately, you have to pay people to show interest in you. Unfortunately, alcohol and drugs are things you can count on. They tell you what you can expect and that's what you get. You can count on drugs/alcohol to do what they say they are going to do. Try that with people.
Drugs and alcohol are predicable, people are not. So which is worse, dieing from disappointments and the pain
I am not looking for an answer to this post, because there is no answer. I'm just a person in the water reaching for a liferaft like everybody else.
Now, I will reach for my next beer and a vodka chaser and call it a day and pray to my higher power that I don't wake up. If I do, it is only because this beast is not done with me yet.

from people, or dieing from alchohol/drugs
2muchpain is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to 2muchpain For This Useful Post:
bluncain (02-13-2014), Hevyn (02-08-2014), Jimuk (02-13-2014), Notimetoloose (02-07-2014), pumpkin1 (02-12-2014), silentrun (02-07-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 05:29 PM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 
newme2day's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 426
Hi 2much. I am really sorry you are feeling so sad. I don't think i need to tell you that alcohol will only intensify those feelings of sadness. Do you have a close friend you can reach out to? Perhaps try the chat room? I am new to this but feel free to pm me if you'd like.
newme2day is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to newme2day For This Useful Post:
dogged14 (02-07-2014), DuckyDarling (02-13-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 05:29 PM   #3 (permalink)
Member
 
FreeOwl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 989
I'm sorry to hear you're feeling this way.... and sorry to hear it's driven you back to the darkness.

Any chance you could grab a glass of water, pour out the booze, and rethink this?
__________________
Ya don't have to drink over it!
FreeOwl is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 05:31 PM   #4 (permalink)
Member
 
FreeOwl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 989
it sucks feeling alone, feeling let down by others, feeling like you're crying out for connection or help and feeling like there's just nobody there.

But crawling into that awful tunnel of hell isn't going to fix it. And offing yourself by drinking to oblivion and beyond.... well, you sure as hell won't ever know the joys of connection with people that way, will ya.

C'mon...
__________________
Ya don't have to drink over it!
FreeOwl is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to FreeOwl For This Useful Post:
DuckyDarling (02-13-2014), HeartsAfire (02-07-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 05:34 PM   #5 (permalink)
bona fido dog-lover
 
least's Avatar
 

Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: eastern USA
Posts: 36,884
Blog Entries: 31
I am sorry you are feeling so alone. I only know that drinking will not help you. On the contrary, it will makes things worse. I hope you can get rid of what you have in the house and go to bed. And pray, not for the end, but for your beginning.
__________________
I'd rather live in my car with my dogs than live in a castle without them.

Dogs may not be our whole lives, but they make our lives whole.

Don't wait for the Last Judgement. It takes place every day. -Albert Camus

Find the good and praise it. - Alex Haley
least is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 05:34 PM   #6 (permalink)
Member
 
reflection's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2011
Location: Pacific NW
Posts: 459
Hi 2much, I'm so sorry you're hurting. I'm with freeowl, any chance of swapping the booze for water, tea or coffee? Hang in there, you are worth it.
reflection is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 05:35 PM   #7 (permalink)
Forum Moderator
 
Dee74's Avatar
 

Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Strailya
Posts: 86,145
Blog Entries: 1
I'm sorry you're feeling so low today.

I used to wish for that person to come to my door and help me too. Noone ever did.

It was a very alcoholic way to feel.
Sit on my couch and wait for the world to come to me.

I don't believe it works that way 2 much.

Self pity is a killer.
I've been there.

We need to work for change. It's not bestowed upon us.

Get yourself out of the hole - start making sober connections and your life will change.,
Not overnight - but it will happen - I guarantee it.

I'm not trying to slap you around.
I just see clearly that my addiction was trying to isolate me with equal doses of pride and self pity.

you could make it to a meeting and start making connections that way?
Tell people you need help. They will respond.

D
__________________
Dee74 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 27 Users Say Thank You to Dee74 For This Useful Post:
aistar (02-08-2014), alphaomega (02-07-2014), bluepoppy (02-07-2014), Bombshell (02-13-2014), BradJustBrad (02-08-2014), DuckyDarling (02-13-2014), FreeOwl (02-07-2014), Goldcoastgirl (02-08-2014), GreenEggsAndHam (02-14-2014), HeartsAfire (02-07-2014), HenryKrinkle (02-08-2014), Hevyn (02-07-2014), honeypig (02-08-2014), Jimuk (02-13-2014), LadyBlue0527 (02-14-2014), least (02-07-2014), Mags1 (02-07-2014), Notimetoloose (02-07-2014), PaulinaPolitely (02-12-2014), peanutty (02-07-2014), Pipping (02-07-2014), Rar (02-12-2014), silentrun (02-07-2014), SoberMama13 (02-14-2014), Tiptree (02-08-2014), tomsteve (02-08-2014), Toodie (02-13-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 05:36 PM   #8 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: London
Posts: 184
Sorry to hear you feel this way. I hope you have a better day tomorrow. Please don't think that nobody cares, because I care. I hope to hear that you are doing well soon. Loneliness and feelings of this nature are very painful and I have experienced this myself. You are right, alcohol and drugs do exactly what they say on the tin including messing up peoples lives. Its a vicious circle and its horrible. I will message you and see how ya doing tomorrow. I care ok. I will talk to you on here as long as you need me. I'm only a week sober so I'm new to this too. Take care and please know that I care. Peace to you.
RJY9 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to RJY9 For This Useful Post:
Flying4Life (02-07-2014), Goldcoastgirl (02-08-2014), Pipping (02-07-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 05:49 PM   #9 (permalink)
Member
 
newhope01's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 333
I know its not the same as 3D contact, but we are all here for you. As you can see many of us care about you and wish you wouldn't drink.

The only way to illicit change is to make the change yourself. No one is going to help you if you don't consistently reach out for help. There are a lot of folks who come to AA once or twice then never come back which can be very exhausting for other members. After awhile we need to build up a buffer to others suffering in this addiction or we will worry ourselves sick. But, if you keep coming back and keep reaching out people will get that your serious and you will make real connections with people.

Drinking will only delay this process and prolong your loneliness. Please don't give up.
newhope01 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to newhope01 For This Useful Post:
alphaomega (02-07-2014), DuckyDarling (02-13-2014), Flying4Life (02-07-2014), Goldcoastgirl (02-08-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 05:56 PM   #10 (permalink)
Member
 
newhope01's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 333
Sometimes when I am hurting and I just want to give up I remember this quote:

"The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain."
Kahlil Gibran On Joy and Sorrow

You may be in pain now but you won't always be; Not if you put down that bottle.
newhope01 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to newhope01 For This Useful Post:
Flying4Life (02-07-2014), JackieC (02-07-2014), least (02-07-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 06:01 PM   #11 (permalink)
Member
 
ScottFromWI's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 2,959
I think you are completely missing the fact that peolple here do care, and we are virtually knocking at your door right now 2much. As Dee says, help won't work if you don't accept it and do your part too. Drinking always makes everything worse too, I hope you can limit the damage and get some rest, tomorrow can be a better day if you want it to. Be safe.
ScottFromWI is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to ScottFromWI For This Useful Post:
aistar (02-08-2014), Dee74 (02-07-2014), Flying4Life (02-07-2014), Goldcoastgirl (02-08-2014), honeypig (02-08-2014), LadyBlue0527 (02-14-2014), least (02-07-2014), tomsteve (02-08-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 06:10 PM   #12 (permalink)
Member
 
Notimetoloose's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: OZ
Posts: 472
I am so sorry you are feeling so alone.
The drinking and drugs prey on those feelings. They are not your friends, they are your enemies.
You are a good person. You deserve good friends and attention. You will find and make good friends in time.
We are here for you as well.
__________________
Someone spoke to me all the days of my life,
into my ear, slowly, taking their time.

Said to me: live, live, live!
It was death.

Etiquetas: Jaime Sabines
Notimetoloose is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Notimetoloose For This Useful Post:
Flying4Life (02-07-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 06:27 PM   #13 (permalink)
Canine Welfare Advocate
 
doggonecarl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 4,505
Blog Entries: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2muchpain View Post
So I messed up and am drinking again. Who the hell cares, really. This site is great as far as connecting with people, but there is nobody knocking on my door or calling me.
Yesterday, or maybe the day before, you replied to a post and was telling that person how your drinking and your behavior while drunk drove everyone away. You ended up a lone, at home drinker. You ended your post with these words:

"I hope you see the direction you are going before you end up like I did, alone, drunk with your only friend/enemy a bottle of something. Good luck."

Wise advise.

You are only days sober. Give yourself time. It will take time for the people who know you to figure out you are changing. But you can't change until you quit drinking.

As for the AA folks not contacting you...sociability is a two-way street. When you sober up tomorrow, try reaching out.
doggonecarl is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to doggonecarl For This Useful Post:
DuckyDarling (02-13-2014), Flying4Life (02-07-2014), Goldcoastgirl (02-08-2014), honeypig (02-08-2014), Jimuk (02-13-2014), jt1234 (02-08-2014), LadyBlue0527 (02-14-2014), least (02-07-2014), newhope01 (02-07-2014), silentrun (02-07-2014), tomsteve (02-08-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 06:35 PM   #14 (permalink)
Member
 
silentrun's Avatar
 

Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: gound zero
Posts: 1,070
Blog Entries: 1
Sorry you are feeling so let down right now. I used to wish I wouldn't wake up often. I did though. It's wasn't just go give the beast one more go at me. One day I was just done with it. Keep coming back..keep trying.
silentrun is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 06:38 PM   #15 (permalink)
Member
 
malcolmsloan's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: against the grain
Posts: 623
Sorry to hear you're struggling 2much, I really am. yeah, I'm just a person on line, but I care. In a virtual sense, we are here, right now, all wanting you to feel better. There has to be some postive aspect to that. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you, friend. It can be if you make it such. You have the power to make tomorrow a better day.
malcolmsloan is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to malcolmsloan For This Useful Post:
newhope01 (02-07-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 06:48 PM   #16 (permalink)
Learning to live again
 
Hevyn's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 16,192
Add me to the list of those who care. I hope so much that your feelings of futility will leave you and you'll give sobriety a fair chance. We are very fragile in the early days - emotions run high and it's easy to fall back on the only relief we know. It's not helping - it's only prolonging your misery. Please don't give up 2much - you can still turn this whole thing around.
__________________
You are so much more than the worst thing you've
ever done. - Fr. Gregory Boyle, Homeboy Industries

Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it well and serenely, and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. - Emerson
Hevyn is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 06:50 PM   #17 (permalink)
Member
 
Amazingglazier's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Island Park , NY
Posts: 213
Give Me your phone number!
Amazingglazier is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Amazingglazier For This Useful Post:
JackieC (02-07-2014), PaulinaPolitely (02-12-2014), pumpkin1 (02-12-2014), Straightshoot (02-07-2014)
Old 02-07-2014, 07:01 PM   #18 (permalink)
Member
 
Amazingglazier's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Island Park , NY
Posts: 213
I had that happen at meetings when I went to AA too, just stopped doing it ! It is not a popularity contest, do what you feel is right! I do at my business, if someone asks me for something, a cigarette or whatever, I tell them i'll do it if they do something for me , whatever it is clean a window or let me teach them something, when they invariably tell me oh no thanks! I laugh at it as I could teach a million people a trade that would make them self-reliant but they don't want that! If someone is in serious need and I can help I do! Stay Strong and Well!
Amazingglazier is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 07:16 PM   #19 (permalink)
Member
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 384
I have led a good life. I have been fortunate enough to have been able to help a lot of people to change their lives for the better. so I know my life has been worthwhile. Of course, you always hope that your efforts always pay off, like a parent that raises a child. You always that child will come back and say thank you for all your hard work. To know that you have spent most of your life helping others, only to be left in a one bedroom apartment with nobody to care is sad. I am not asking for much. I call or a card would be great< FROM SOMEBODY, would be great. Is that asking too much?
2muchpain is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2014, 07:27 PM   #20 (permalink)
Member
 
Amazingglazier's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Island Park , NY
Posts: 213
Sent you a PM now do what you think is right!
Amazingglazier is online now  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiTweet this Post!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Amazingglazier For This Useful Post:
newme2day (02-12-2014)
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:46 AM.


 
National Drug and Alcohol Treatment Centers
 
Drug Rehab | Best Treatment Center | Detox Center | Residential Treatment Center
Cocaine/Crack Treatment | Alcohol Rehab | Heroin/Oxycontin Treatment Center | Crystal Meth Treatment | Marijuana Treatment | Methadone Treatment | Suboxone Treatment
 
Local Treatment Resources and Events
 
Alabama | Alaska | Arizona | Arkansas | California | Colorado | Connecticut | DC | Delaware
Florida | Georgia | Hawaii | Idaho | Illinois | Indiana | Iowa | Kansas | Kentucky | Louisiana | Maine
Maryland | Massachusetts | Michigan | Minnesota | Mississippi | Missouri | Montana | Nebraska | Nevada | New Hampshire
New Jersey | New Mexico | New York | North Carolina | North Dakota | Ohio | Oklahoma | Oregon | Pennsylvania | Rhode Island
South Carolina | South Dakota | Tennesee | Texas | Utah | Vermont | Virginia | Washington | West Virginia | Wisconsin | Wyoming

© 2013 Internet Brands. | Privacy Policy
A proud member of the SoberRecovery® Network of Addiction and Recovery Websites