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Old 09-01-2013, 11:08 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Anger and irritability in early recovery

This post is as much for my benefit so as to get it out 'on paper' as it were as anything.

A week sober now - into day eight in fact. I am sleeping a lot and eating well and generally beginning to feel pretty good after a few days worth of withdrawal. However I was out walking my dogs this morning and passed a place I had a little run-in with someone a couple of months ago. I was walking in an area where I have done for five years or so when one day a teacher challenges me and says the ground is part of school property and I'm not allowed to walk there. It probably is but there are no fences or signs and most land here in the UK is public. So I tell her I have walked here for years and go on my way.

This morning as I walked past the same place I ran through the scenario I had that day and suddenly felt almost murderous towards the person in question! I ran through the whole thing in my head and how I would verbally tear her to shreds if she dared do such a thing again..etc.

I am a very gentle and un-aggressive person by nature, so this was way out of character. The day has actually been full of suppressed rages. It isn't fair to express them to those around me so I don't but it has battered my head a bit!

Anyone else go through anything similar?
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Old 09-01-2013, 11:17 AM   #2 (permalink)
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have had rages when I was drinking totally uncontrolled . I hope they don't get worse now im on day 2. try breathing deeply when you feel the rage I could do that when I was sober. hope you feel better tomorrow
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Old 09-01-2013, 11:27 AM   #3 (permalink)

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Hi Mentium, congratulations on day 8. Great!! Yes I did have alot of anger. I think frustration turns into anger at some point. So I would call it extreme frustration. Your body is going thru so much. It's an internal battle. This will definitely get better. When toxins have gotten out of you. And good healthy food and water are in you. I believe this. I found hard, sweaty physical exercise to help the most. Try urge surfing, google it, this should help.
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Old 09-01-2013, 12:57 PM   #4 (permalink)
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This was a massive problem for me early on Mentium. So much so that I spent more time looking up anger management than I did alcoholism in the first month or so. I thought I might murder someone at work and I kept out of everyone else's way, though I did get into a few arguments with family. To be honest I think they were all really on edge around me because I was so temperamental. I'll be honest and say that side of me has always been there and it goes hand in hand with addictive behaviour, having a sense of entitlement and being a complete control freak. It seemed to be such a physical thing though, a part of withdrawal, because it left and things calmed down (almost too calm for a while). It is a massive adjustment getting sober and I think we go through a whole range of exaggerated emotions. Just remember you don't have to act the way you feel, and hopefully that will help avoid any serious run ins

Btw that is the cutest dog ever

'The less I needed, the better I felt' - Charles Bukowski
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Old 09-01-2013, 01:07 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I didn't notice it so much when I went off the alcohol because I was just too depressed at first. It is like that with giving up the nicotine. Things that happened years ago suddenly I am very angry about. It all seems to center around work people. It sucks. I am sure it is normal but I can't wait for it to be over.
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Old 09-01-2013, 01:51 PM   #6 (permalink)
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'Anger' is popularly considered one of the five stages of grief, first hypothesized by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. The list has been expanded to six or seven since her early formulation.

Some of us find it useful to frame early sobriety as a mourning process, having separated from what for many became the most important part of their lives.

Google "stages of grief" to get a more comprehensive understanding of the grieving process.
“The world we see that seems so insane is the result of a belief system that is not working. To perceive the world differently, we must be willing to change our belief system, let the past slip away, expand our sense of now, and dissolve the fear in our minds.” W. James
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