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Old 05-13-2013, 09:30 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Sad and Ashamed

I am a seemingly, normal, upstanding, responsible adult, and yet I cannot get my binge drinking under control. I am now up to 3-4 binges a week (3-6 drinks/night that ALWAYS leave me with a terrible hangover). I probably had 6-8 drinks Saturday night. It's Monday and I still feel hungover.

These past few years have been dreadful, and I know I'm using alcohol to escape, but I'm running out of excuses for my inexcusable behavior.

My health plan does not include coverage for chemical dependency treatment and, because I'm self-employed, there is no way I could be gone for a month anyhow.

I grow more and more desperate with each binge. Can anyone out there help?
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Old 05-13-2013, 09:34 AM   #2 (permalink)
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to the family. There are lots of sobriety programs out there that don't require inpatient treatment. The most well known is AA, which is free. Why not go to some meetings and tell them you want to stop drinking. I know you'll get a lot of support there.

There are other ways too. I stopped drinking using this site and counseling sessions. It's worked for three years now.

Whichever way you choose, work it like your life depends on it cause it does.
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Old 05-13-2013, 09:37 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I'm a daily / binge drinker. This past weekend I drank a half gallon of vodka. The only solution for people like us is to give up alcohol for good. It won't be easy but will be so worth it.
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Old 05-13-2013, 09:50 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Hi and welcome. I started here in March, put 14 days together, got all cocky and decided I was fine. I'm back today. I'm also a binge drinker. Last binge was Thursday night and it took me until yesterday to feel decent again. I have horrid hangovers. I hate it. So here I am. Much more humble. And still hopeful.
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Old 05-13-2013, 09:57 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Hello,

Keep coming back here, read what people with experience have to say, and vent when needed. With will power you can change your patterns.

What I was told when I first started posting, a week ago... and so far no slips, no urges and no drink.
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:00 AM   #6 (permalink)
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jefaber, I worked for myself for years, using drinking to get through the day. It began to catch up with me, and took lots out of my life. If you can get help now, do it. AA is a fine way to begin, and you are out there with Hazelden. Call them and explain your situation. Sometimes these places have "scholarships", outpatient programs, sober living houses...and if one is honest and open about your life's situations, there may be options.

Here is a link to their home page: Hazelden addiction treatment centers - MN, IL, NY, FL, OR -- Hazelden
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:01 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Thank you...

I am grateful for the replies. Thank you!

I know my life does depend on it, because I am also on anti-depressant meds. It states clearly on the label not to use alcohol, but here I am: cries3:

I am also interested in finding a program other than AA. The "God" and "Higher Power" beliefs do not fit in with my sensibilities.
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:08 AM   #8 (permalink)
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jefaber, you sound like you're exactly where I was 7 weeks ago. I'd usually drank 3 nights during the work week 6-8 beers a night. On weekends, much more. There were drugs of all kinds in the mix as well. I put on this front that I had my act together. I fooled some but not as many as I may have thought. I too was sad and ashamed ... then I had a moment of clarity when I decided that I had enough. There are people here who have wonderful suggestions and advice. I'm new at this so I'm a little shaky in the advice department. That being said, for me making a plan, keeping busy, throwing away all of my paraphernalia were good first moves. I also talked to my wife, my adult children, my friends, and family to tell them of my decision to get sober and that I needed their support. So far so good. DON'T GIVE UP!!!! NEVER GIVE UP!!!
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:26 AM   #9 (permalink)
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You're right, Bruce292, that does sound exactly like me. I, too, think I have most people fooled. I work from home, and a lot of my business meetings are over the phone, so it makes it easier to act like I've got things together. Even my husband (who drinks responsibly) is quite the enabler. He is not worried at all...but should be!

Congratulations on your decision and making it seven weeks! SO much of my social life is built around "let's get together for a glass of wine," that it's ridiculous. It's going to be hard, but I'm also going to try hard. I can't go on doing this.
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:30 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Boy, that sounds familiar, Trying Harder, but I've never even been able to make it 14 days. That is an accomplishment!
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:33 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by jefaber View Post
I am also interested in finding a program other than AA. The "God" and "Higher Power" beliefs do not fit in with my sensibilities.
I'm guessing the binge drinking in combination with anti-depressants don't fiti in too well with your sensibilities either.

My point is, most of us need to make MAJOR changes in our lifestyles to get sober. And that may mean doing some things you completely disagree with initally or never even considered. I'm personally not an AA member but don't discount it unless you have tried it. There are many non-religious people who succeed in AA. And if that doesn't work there are plenty of secular recovery methods - many of them have sub-forums here as well.
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:34 AM   #12 (permalink)
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I hadn't either but I did it using this site. And I can do it again and so can you. I'm also a female with a longtime good job and seemingly normal life. I want more. I want a sober life.
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Old 05-13-2013, 10:53 AM   #13 (permalink)
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I'm humble about giving advice as I'm only 9 months sober. But for this super isolated drinker, what saves me daily is connecting to others. So my only thought is don't suffer alone. Connecting to people here is a great start. That's how I began my path. And it's great because you can log in at 3 in the morning and just getting the crazies off your chest knowing that someone somewhere will probably write back. Just that stopped me from picking up a number of times.

Welcome and take care,

Zorah
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Old 05-13-2013, 11:03 AM   #14 (permalink)
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There's SMART recovery, secular and science based.
I think you can find meetings through their website.
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Old 05-13-2013, 11:18 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Thank you so much, Zorah. I am VERY isolated because I work out of my home. I think that complicates things because there's no separating workplace stress from home. Plus, I'm a new empty-nester, so don't have the break when the kids get home from school. I appreciate you reaching out. Very kind.
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Old 05-13-2013, 11:41 AM   #16 (permalink)
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SMART recovery is great. Also finding a meditation group is useful. Believe me, I know how hard it is working alone out of your home...
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Old 05-13-2013, 11:44 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Also, there is AVRT: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ined-long.html (AVRT Explained (long))

A lot of people here have found help and I am sure there are on-going threads associated with it.
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Old 05-13-2013, 12:12 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Binge drinking----

There was a wonderful title to an album from the 70's - "What Were Once Vices Are Now Habits"

And that's what happens so often. My binges just became my normal drinking.

There are all kinds of ways to get better and change your life. I've been to a few AA meetings and I certainly won't rule it out in the future. Currently I see an addiction therapist every week and I'm on this site several times a day.

Take a good look around and see what works for you.
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Old 05-13-2013, 01:18 PM   #19 (permalink)
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You are right, ClearLight! My binges have become my norm and drinking has definitely taken on a pattern: Monday night: Drink to excess; Tuesday: feel miserable, be unproductive, don't drink; Wedesday: Be so productive that I "deserve" that drink at the end of the day; Thursday, back to miserable...

I hadn't really thought of it that way.
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Old 05-13-2013, 01:28 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Can anyone out there help?

No.

But we can assist you in staying sober.
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