gonzo4419

I've seen a few posts about dealing with getting through the holidays when first trying to recover. I've had both total success and total failure this time of year. My best bet has always been using "Ah sorry, wish I could, but I'm taking _____ because of ________, and wish I could but I can't have any alcohol with it". It makes sense and it works, but I'm pretty sure I've used this the past 4 years (wonder why he always has this stomach thing in December).
Also had success when I order an obvious drink but have them (subtely as possible) virgin. No questions because it looks like I'm drinking while I'm not.

Just wondering if anyone else has some coping mechanisms, or a link to some. What I have done so far has been about 50-50, the goal is to bat 1.00.

renaldo

If someone doesn't support your decision not to drink - for whatever reason - (s)he's not a true friend. It sounds mind-numbingly simple, but it really is that simple. There's no reason to cover up not drinking. There's nothing abnormal about not drinking. Plenty of people do it and don't think twice about it. They see those movies from the 40's where the first thing people ask when someone comes to visit is "would you like a cigarette or a drink?" and yet it goes in one ear and out the other. It never occurs to them to smoke or drink. There are tons of people like that.

I don't feel like I need to explain to drunk people singing karaoke why I'm not drinking. But then again, I never put myself in that situation.

hypochondriac

I was trying to quit (ish) last xmas and I didn't get anywhere. Not because of the time of year rather that I hadn't quite finished drinking. Same happened a few years earlier when I was seeing an addictions counsellor who was trying to help me cut down my drinking. I think I used the excuse that it was Xmas as the reason I couldn't but really I just didn't want to stop drinking or even cut down (I was forcibly referred at that time).

I think when you have made the decision to stop drinking and never drink again then it doesn't matter what time of year it is. Of course it is harder being around other drinkers and that's more likely to happen around this time of year. Even after 9 months I can't wait til Xmas is over so I don't have any forced parties to go to. But I am not worried that I will drink. And I don't owe anyone an explanation. It isn't compulsory to drink at Xmas (though a year or so ago I may have argued with myself about that one ).

I think the thing to remember is that if everyone else is drinking then they're not going to notice you aren't because they're drunk. As long as you don't interfere with their drinking they won't care.