Becoming "Normal" - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Jen31 · 10-30-2012, 04:53 AM

Good morning everyone.
My name is Jen and I'm new to Sober Recovery. I have been battling addiction for nine years now. I celebrated my 31st birthday yesterday, and my last glass of wine.
For the past few years I've wanted to be "normal." I've wanted to wake up at five in the morning, sober, and proceed with my day like most parents/wives do. For whatever reason, that hope & dream would always end at 8pm, as I would drink a full bottle (or two) of wine, by myself. Which, of course, would begin the vicious cycle of "needing" more, whether it was that night, or the following morning (hair of the dog). The sad thing is, each time I went to the store for items for dinner, I would tell myself that I didn't want or need alcohol. Yet, I always ended up with it.
Starting today, I'm taking all possible measures to get my life on track and to start treating myself better and become the mother my daughter needs me to be.
I'm very thankful I have found Sober Recovery. Just typing my feelings and my new decision, is making me feel so much better. I know I have a very long and difficult road ahead of me but sharing and reading experiences is going to make that road a little easier to travel.
Jen

coming_clean · 10-30-2012, 05:01 AM

welcome.

***least*** · 10-30-2012, 05:18 AM

Welcome to the family and congrats on your decision to live sober.

You won't regret it.

MIRecovery · 10-30-2012, 05:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jen31

Good morning everyone.
I'm taking all possible measures to get my life on track and to start treating myself better and become the mother my daughter needs me to be.
I'm very thankful I have found Sober Recovery. Just typing my feelings and my new decision, is making me feel so much better. I know I have a very long and difficult road ahead of me but sharing and reading experiences is going to make that road a little easier to travel.
Jen

Welcome to sober recovery and congrats on your decision to lead a sober life.

Although sober recovery is a great place what other measures are you taking to stay sober?

Jen31 · 10-30-2012, 05:57 AM

Thank you, MIRecovery.
The plans I have this far, to help with my recovery are:
Have my husband make trips to the store for me
Have my step-son or husband put gas in the car for me (gas stations are my enemy)
Kindly decline all invitations where alcohol may be involved
Get back into my sewing hobby, to take my mind off of drinking
Start working out again, to get my mind off drinking (I've gained 100lbs bc of alcohol)

So far, this is what I have decided to do. Does anyone have more suggestions?

Thanks so much,
Jen

tinkanman · 10-30-2012, 06:09 AM

way to go jen. i'd encourage you to take small steps first. focus on today and don't worry about the future. live in the moment and enjoy it. many recovering alcoholics attend meetings regularly which help you stay the course and give all kinds of support. i'm not one of those people, but it really boils down to what works for you. i too like to exercise esp in the early evenings when i used to drink. good luck on your journey. this web site is incredible and is great away to share with others.

CherylT · 10-30-2012, 06:15 AM

I too liked my wine and when I stop to pick up groceries the habit is to pick up the wine too. When I started to finish off the whole bottle myself I knew it was time to change. Then I found out how hard it was for me.
For me I had to start looking behind the reasons I was drinking. Digging deep to see why I really drank. For me sheer will power didn't do it. Also to surround yourself with support is helpful. Even though I don't attend AA meetings I got myself a sponsor. It is great to talk (and not just type) to a person who has gone through this before. There is a big difference in actually talking and typing.
Namaste

MIRecovery · 10-30-2012, 06:17 AM

I found AVRT (Addictive Voice Recovery Technique) to be very useful in early recovery.

I also am a huge AA fan because AA worked when nothing else would and saved my life but there are multiple pathes to recovery.

You may also wish to investigate an out patient rehab which will educate you on addiction in general and give you a support network of sober people.

One thing you did not metion is removing all alcohol from your house.

Jen31 · 10-30-2012, 06:35 AM

Thank you, everyone, for the advice and kind words.

MIRecovery,
I never keep alcohol. The moment I buy it, it's gone. There's never any chance of just having it sitting around.

Happier · 10-30-2012, 07:58 AM

Jen, Welcome! Congrats on your decision. I don't ever claim to be "normal" LOL....too boring. However, sober life has been a great decision for me and I have absolutely no regrets.

I like your plan. In my case, I also had to make a "Plan B". In other words, what am I going to do or add if I find myself tempted or weakening? What is my "back-up parachute" that I may need in a pinch? In my case, that is local face-to-face help. Most likely an AA meeting. I haven't done that yet. I know though that I have committed that I will go there BEFORE I take my next drink.

Jen31 · 10-30-2012, 08:04 AM

Hi, Happier.
Congratulations on being sober... And not boring lol.
You're absolutely right. I do need a back up plan, because I can't stay shut inside my house for the rest of my life!

SSIL75 · 10-30-2012, 10:16 AM

Your story and mine are so similar. Welcome!

venicequeen · 10-30-2012, 10:38 AM

Welcome. Congrats on making the right decision and taking the first step toward your recovery. I wish you the best. Just remember, you are stronger than this addiction and you do have the power to beat it!

Jen31 · 10-30-2012, 10:43 AM

Everyone is so welcoming and caring. I'm so glad to be a part of Sober Recovery.
Thank you so much!
Jen

**Dee74** · 10-30-2012, 02:23 PM

Welcome Jen - I had that same dream (although waking up at 5 is not always as great as I thought it might be lol)

It is possible and it can be done

glad you're here

Natom · 10-30-2012, 02:26 PM

Welcome to the forums Jen,

Enjoy your journey.

Natom.

10-30-2012, 04:53 AM	#1 (permalink)
Jen31 Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Texas Posts: 124	Becoming "Normal" Good morning everyone. My name is Jen and I'm new to Sober Recovery. I have been battling addiction for nine years now. I celebrated my 31st birthday yesterday, and my last glass of wine. For the past few years I've wanted to be "normal." I've wanted to wake up at five in the morning, sober, and proceed with my day like most parents/wives do. For whatever reason, that hope & dream would always end at 8pm, as I would drink a full bottle (or two) of wine, by myself. Which, of course, would begin the vicious cycle of "needing" more, whether it was that night, or the following morning (hair of the dog). The sad thing is, each time I went to the store for items for dinner, I would tell myself that I didn't want or need alcohol. Yet, I always ended up with it. Starting today, I'm taking all possible measures to get my life on track and to start treating myself better and become the mother my daughter needs me to be. I'm very thankful I have found Sober Recovery. Just typing my feelings and my new decision, is making me feel so much better. I know I have a very long and difficult road ahead of me but sharing and reading experiences is going to make that road a little easier to travel. Jen

10-30-2012, 05:01 AM	#2 (permalink)
coming_clean Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: The Netherlands Posts: 1,117	welcome. __________________ 'Life begins at the end of your comfort zone' Mind over matter. If you do not mind. It does not matter. If your ship doesn’t come in, swim to it.

10-30-2012, 05:18 AM	#3 (permalink)
*least* bona fido dog-lover Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: eastern USA Posts: 28,666 Blog Entries: 31	Welcome to the family and congrats on your decision to live sober. You won't regret it. __________________ I'd rather live in my car with my dogs than live in a castle without them. Dogs may not be our whole lives, but they make our lives whole. Don't wait for the Last Judgement. It takes place every day. -Albert Camus Find the good and praise it. - Alex Haley

10-30-2012, 06:17 AM	#8 (permalink)
MIRecovery A Day at a Time Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: Grand Rapids MI Posts: 1,563	I found AVRT (Addictive Voice Recovery Technique) to be very useful in early recovery. I also am a huge AA fan because AA worked when nothing else would and saved my life but there are multiple pathes to recovery. You may also wish to investigate an out patient rehab which will educate you on addiction in general and give you a support network of sober people. One thing you did not metion is removing all alcohol from your house. __________________ I've dealt with my ghosts and faced all my demons Finally content with a past I regret I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness For once I'm at peace with myself

10-30-2012, 10:16 AM	#12 (permalink)
SSIL75 New to Real Life Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: I come in Peaces Posts: 2,063	Your story and mine are so similar. Welcome! __________________ Sober since 8.23.2010 Learning a new way to live.

10-30-2012, 05:57 AM	#5 (permalink)
Jen31 Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Texas Posts: 124	Thank you, MIRecovery. The plans I have this far, to help with my recovery are: Have my husband make trips to the store for me Have my step-son or husband put gas in the car for me (gas stations are my enemy) Kindly decline all invitations where alcohol may be involved Get back into my sewing hobby, to take my mind off of drinking Start working out again, to get my mind off drinking (I've gained 100lbs bc of alcohol) So far, this is what I have decided to do. Does anyone have more suggestions? Thanks so much, Jen

10-30-2012, 06:09 AM	#6 (permalink)
tinkanman Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: deep south Posts: 58	way to go jen. i'd encourage you to take small steps first. focus on today and don't worry about the future. live in the moment and enjoy it. many recovering alcoholics attend meetings regularly which help you stay the course and give all kinds of support. i'm not one of those people, but it really boils down to what works for you. i too like to exercise esp in the early evenings when i used to drink. good luck on your journey. this web site is incredible and is great away to share with others.

10-30-2012, 06:15 AM	#7 (permalink)
CherylT Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Posts: 25	I too liked my wine and when I stop to pick up groceries the habit is to pick up the wine too. When I started to finish off the whole bottle myself I knew it was time to change. Then I found out how hard it was for me. For me I had to start looking behind the reasons I was drinking. Digging deep to see why I really drank. For me sheer will power didn't do it. Also to surround yourself with support is helpful. Even though I don't attend AA meetings I got myself a sponsor. It is great to talk (and not just type) to a person who has gone through this before. There is a big difference in actually talking and typing. Namaste

10-30-2012, 06:35 AM	#9 (permalink)
Jen31 Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Texas Posts: 124	Thank you, everyone, for the advice and kind words. MIRecovery, I never keep alcohol. The moment I buy it, it's gone. There's never any chance of just having it sitting around.

10-30-2012, 07:58 AM	#10 (permalink)
Happier Member Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 510	Jen, Welcome! Congrats on your decision. I don't ever claim to be "normal" LOL....too boring. However, sober life has been a great decision for me and I have absolutely no regrets. I like your plan. In my case, I also had to make a "Plan B". In other words, what am I going to do or add if I find myself tempted or weakening? What is my "back-up parachute" that I may need in a pinch? In my case, that is local face-to-face help. Most likely an AA meeting. I haven't done that yet. I know though that I have committed that I will go there BEFORE I take my next drink.

10-30-2012, 08:04 AM	#11 (permalink)
Jen31 Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Texas Posts: 124	Hi, Happier. Congratulations on being sober... And not boring lol. You're absolutely right. I do need a back up plan, because I can't stay shut inside my house for the rest of my life!

10-30-2012, 10:38 AM	#13 (permalink)
venicequeen Member Join Date: Jul 2012 Location: philadelphia, pa Posts: 24	Welcome. Congrats on making the right decision and taking the first step toward your recovery. I wish you the best. Just remember, you are stronger than this addiction and you do have the power to beat it!

10-30-2012, 10:43 AM	#14 (permalink)
Jen31 Member Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: Texas Posts: 124	Everyone is so welcoming and caring. I'm so glad to be a part of Sober Recovery. Thank you so much! Jen

10-30-2012, 02:23 PM	#15 (permalink)
Dee74 SR Moderator Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Seas Posts: 65,418	Welcome Jen - I had that same dream (although waking up at 5 is not always as great as I thought it might be lol) It is possible and it can be done glad you're here __________________

10-30-2012, 02:26 PM	#16 (permalink)
Natom Not Alone Join Date: Oct 2012 Location: South East UK Posts: 1,240 Blog Entries: 2	Welcome to the forums Jen, Enjoy your journey. Natom. __________________ Tiny little boxes in a row. Ain't what you want it's what you know. Just happy in the shoes you're wearin.

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