Going to a concert sober - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Prettynoose · 09-11-2012, 12:48 PM

This Saturday I plan on going to a Stone Temple Pilots concert sober.

It seems strange to me to do something like this without alcohol, but I really want to prove to myself that I can enjoy it and have fun without drinking.

I am very new in my recovery, but I don't want to miss the concert as it will be probably one of my only chances to see one of my favourite bands.

superflyashley · 09-11-2012, 12:53 PM

I love STP.

doggonecarl · 09-11-2012, 12:57 PM

Good luck, then.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prettynoose

...I really want to prove to myself that I can enjoy it and have fun without drinking.

I wanted very much to enjoy the things I used to do when drinking. But I found the best way to prove that I could stay sober was to not put myself in situations that would prove too tempting. Live music was one of those situations.

I had to put my recovery ahead of fun, at least in the beginning.

What's your strategy for staying sober at this show?

ivehadenoughnow · 09-11-2012, 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prettynoose

This Saturday I plan on going to a Stone Temple Pilots concert sober.

It seems strange to me to do something like this without alcohol, but I really want to prove to myself that I can enjoy it and have fun without drinking.

I am very new in my recovery, but I don't want to miss the concert as it will be probably one of my only chances to see one of my favourite bands.

I wouldn't go within a 100 miles of that place. You want to stack the deck in your favorite, not in the dealers(alcohol). IMHO, by going to that concert you are stacking the deck in the dealers favor and increasing your chances of caving 10-fold. That's just my opinion. I hope it all works out.

Mark75 · 09-11-2012, 12:59 PM

As Carl suggested, you should have a plan... But if you really enjoy the music this band plays, you have something to concentrate on.

I go to a lot of music events. I enjoy them very much. It was a little weird at first, but now, heck... it's better than it ever was...

Prettynoose · 09-11-2012, 01:21 PM

I know, my husband is not sure I should go either.

I am going with a friend who doesn't drink and knows about my situation.

In the end though, I need to choose not to drink that day. I will let you all know how it goes. I just can't miss the concert. I would really regret it. My plan in my mind is 100% to stay sober.

Thanks for the concern though everyone. I do appreciate it.

Martin1 · 09-11-2012, 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prettynoose

I know, my husband is not sure I should go either.

I am going with a friend who doesn't drink and knows about my situation.

In the end though, I need to choose not to drink that day. I will let you all know how it goes. I just can't miss the concert. I would really regret it. My plan in my mind is 100% to stay sober.

Thanks for the concern though everyone. I do appreciate it.

I think if you're desperate enough you'll do it, I agree with others though, given the choice I'd avoid the conert.

hypochondriac · 09-11-2012, 01:40 PM

Just be very careful and be aware of the dangers Prettynoose. I went to see Doug Stanhope (big drinking comedian) when I was sober only a few months with my biggest drinking buddy! I'd had the tickets for months and there was no way I wasn't going to go but I felt really awkward and out of it for not drinking. It wasn't easy. But the last gig I went to before that was rubbish because I was so bothered about being close to the bar etc... and spent more time drinking than watching the band. Wah, alcohol makes everything rubbish. I hope you have a good time. Maybe make a commitment to log on here and let us know how you got on, might help keep you accountable x

SoberCAH · 09-11-2012, 01:46 PM

I went to a NASCAR race when I was 6 months sober.

After having kind of a tough time at the Saturday race (freaking out from smelling dope and being around a lot of beer, bourbon, etc.), I sold my tickets for the Sunday race and went home and watched it on tv the next day - feeling a lot smarter for my decision.

I have been sober for a good while, but alcohol (and drugs) are still bigger than I am.

As a result, I am very careful about the kind of situations I find acceptable and those that I decide to take a pass on.

Because there is no part of that old way of life, and those awful problems, that I want back.

guskasb14 · 09-11-2012, 02:36 PM

I had a similar situation. I went with friends on day 4 to go hiking fishing and get out of town. They were all camping (and drinking) which I knew going in. For me it was fun to go and hang out, fish, hike, hunt and do a lot of things I enjoyed. However, I was not ready to quite make the leap to camping. For me, it just was not time. However my plan was go, and do everything but drinking and camping. And it worked. I went back up the next day in the morning and met up again and enjoyed the day. I never felt like I should of had a drink, or even wanted to. I just was happy with the steps I took to enjoy, but not drink. What also helped was telling my friends I was taking steps toward being sober. That helped with not asking me if I wanted a drink, or anything like that. And as great friends, they never did. My plan was really just setting boundries (not on the drinking) but on how far I was going to go into my situation. I do believe I will be camping with them all in time......but for now.....I had fun, and didn't drink.....it worked for day 3-4.

**Dee74** · 09-11-2012, 03:34 PM

I think a lot of us want to put our bad times behind us as soon as possible...that's natural.

A lot of us don't relish having to change our lives much beyond not drinking - that's natural too.

but I really wanted this recovery thing to work. I wasn't sure I'd make it back if I went out drinking again.

I found it necessary to make some pretty big changes in my life, some of them were pretty difficult, some were uncomfortable - but I'm glad I made them.

I stayed away from concerts, festivals, and all things where alcohol would be a major component until I felt I was secure enough in my recovery not to let my surroundings affect me or my focus.

I weighed up those parties, those gigs, those get togethers against what I wanted the rest of my life to be.

I told myself there'd be other invitations and occasions, many other times to come when I'd be more secure...and there have been

I'm glad I waited prettynoose - those few months I 'took off' were a great investment for me.

D

Hope4Life · 09-11-2012, 03:39 PM

I've been to several concerts since I stopped drinking and it was totally worth it. You wont miss anything, when you would be going to the bar and bathroom if you were drinking. Your memories of the concert will improve dramatically and you wont have to worry about driving home drunk. Bottled water is WAY cheaper at a show than beer or drinks.

Have a GREAT time!!

Mark75 · 09-11-2012, 03:46 PM

Oh, OK... You've got a sober friend, that is a good plan. Is your friend OK if you have to bail?

NoFireWater · 09-11-2012, 03:50 PM

I agree with Hope4Life, it can be done. I just got back from a concert last weekend and had a great time not drinking. It was cool to remember every bit of the show, and not feel exhausted before it. You do have to have a plan though as it would be easy to cave. Mine was "I'll only drink if the musician is at the same table drinking with us" (which would never happen so I was safe lol)

To me, part of being sober is being able to experience things that make me happy. I would have been angry and resentful if I had to miss the concert solely because I was worried about slipping up and drinking. Each person is different though, and you have to make your decision with a very clear mind.
To some it would be a challenge, to others it would be an invitation to drink.

sugarbear1 · 09-11-2012, 04:05 PM

I saw Pink Floyd years ago when I was sober then. There were two of us who were both sober at the time and we had a blast!

I am trying to see Chicago and Kansas in November....saving $$ as we speak!

soberbythesea · 09-11-2012, 08:02 PM

I think you have to weigh whether you think this event will be a trigger for you.

Personally, now that I'm on my third crack at sobriety, I am a lot more cautious. I've suddenly realized I don't know everything and that I can't necessarily handle situations I used to think would be no problem. I look back at some of my past posts here and cringe at the hubris/bravado/just plain stupidity of some of the things I thought I should be able to go and do.

So, at this point in my own journey, I tend to side with those who say: stack the deck in your favor, not the dealer's, and avoid any and all situations you associate with drinking. At least for now. But I'm not you, so as I said, you need to weigh how you feel about it.

Hope4Life · 09-16-2012, 02:41 PM

Just wondering if you had a good time at the STP show, so check in and let us know....

Best Wishes

doggonecarl · 09-17-2012, 06:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prettynoose

In the end though, I need to choose not to drink that day. I will let you all know how it goes. I just can't miss the concert. I would really regret it. My plan in my mind is 100% to stay sober.

Did you decide to go to the concert? How did you fare?

09-11-2012, 12:48 PM	#1 (permalink)
Prettynoose Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 42	Going to a concert sober This Saturday I plan on going to a Stone Temple Pilots concert sober. It seems strange to me to do something like this without alcohol, but I really want to prove to myself that I can enjoy it and have fun without drinking. I am very new in my recovery, but I don't want to miss the concert as it will be probably one of my only chances to see one of my favourite bands.

09-11-2012, 01:40 PM	#8 (permalink)
hypochondriac Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: UK Posts: 4,274	Just be very careful and be aware of the dangers Prettynoose. I went to see Doug Stanhope (big drinking comedian) when I was sober only a few months with my biggest drinking buddy! I'd had the tickets for months and there was no way I wasn't going to go but I felt really awkward and out of it for not drinking. It wasn't easy. But the last gig I went to before that was rubbish because I was so bothered about being close to the bar etc... and spent more time drinking than watching the band. Wah, alcohol makes everything rubbish. I hope you have a good time. Maybe make a commitment to log on here and let us know how you got on, might help keep you accountable x __________________ “The future you have tomorrow, won't be the same future you had yesterday.” ― Chuck Palahniuk, Rant

09-11-2012, 03:34 PM	#11 (permalink)
Dee74 SR Moderator Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Seas Posts: 65,543	I think a lot of us want to put our bad times behind us as soon as possible...that's natural. A lot of us don't relish having to change our lives much beyond not drinking - that's natural too. but I really wanted this recovery thing to work. I wasn't sure I'd make it back if I went out drinking again. I found it necessary to make some pretty big changes in my life, some of them were pretty difficult, some were uncomfortable - but I'm glad I made them. I stayed away from concerts, festivals, and all things where alcohol would be a major component until I felt I was secure enough in my recovery not to let my surroundings affect me or my focus. I weighed up those parties, those gigs, those get togethers against what I wanted the rest of my life to be. I told myself there'd be other invitations and occasions, many other times to come when I'd be more secure...and there have been I'm glad I waited prettynoose - those few months I 'took off' were a great investment for me. D __________________

09-11-2012, 03:39 PM	#12 (permalink)
Hope4Life Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: California Posts: 193	You can handle it I've been to several concerts since I stopped drinking and it was totally worth it. You wont miss anything, when you would be going to the bar and bathroom if you were drinking. Your memories of the concert will improve dramatically and you wont have to worry about driving home drunk. Bottled water is WAY cheaper at a show than beer or drinks. Have a GREAT time!!

09-11-2012, 04:05 PM	#15 (permalink)
sugarbear1 ~sb Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: MD Posts: 9,763	I saw Pink Floyd years ago when I was sober then. There were two of us who were both sober at the time and we had a blast! I am trying to see Chicago and Kansas in November....saving $$ as we speak! __________________ Someday everything will all make sense. For now, laugh at confusion, smile through tears, & remind yourself that everything happens for a reason. All Big Book quotes are from the first edition. Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.

09-11-2012, 12:53 PM	#2 (permalink)
superflyashley Member Join Date: Sep 2012 Posts: 16	I love STP.

09-11-2012, 12:59 PM	#5 (permalink)
Mark75 Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 6,819	As Carl suggested, you should have a plan... But if you really enjoy the music this band plays, you have something to concentrate on. I go to a lot of music events. I enjoy them very much. It was a little weird at first, but now, heck... it's better than it ever was...

09-11-2012, 01:21 PM	#6 (permalink)
Prettynoose Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 42	I know, my husband is not sure I should go either. I am going with a friend who doesn't drink and knows about my situation. In the end though, I need to choose not to drink that day. I will let you all know how it goes. I just can't miss the concert. I would really regret it. My plan in my mind is 100% to stay sober. Thanks for the concern though everyone. I do appreciate it.

09-11-2012, 01:46 PM	#9 (permalink)
SoberCAH Member Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: West Tn Posts: 39	I went to a NASCAR race when I was 6 months sober. After having kind of a tough time at the Saturday race (freaking out from smelling dope and being around a lot of beer, bourbon, etc.), I sold my tickets for the Sunday race and went home and watched it on tv the next day - feeling a lot smarter for my decision. I have been sober for a good while, but alcohol (and drugs) are still bigger than I am. As a result, I am very careful about the kind of situations I find acceptable and those that I decide to take a pass on. Because there is no part of that old way of life, and those awful problems, that I want back.

09-11-2012, 02:36 PM	#10 (permalink)
guskasb14 Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Posts: 46	I had a similar situation. I went with friends on day 4 to go hiking fishing and get out of town. They were all camping (and drinking) which I knew going in. For me it was fun to go and hang out, fish, hike, hunt and do a lot of things I enjoyed. However, I was not ready to quite make the leap to camping. For me, it just was not time. However my plan was go, and do everything but drinking and camping. And it worked. I went back up the next day in the morning and met up again and enjoyed the day. I never felt like I should of had a drink, or even wanted to. I just was happy with the steps I took to enjoy, but not drink. What also helped was telling my friends I was taking steps toward being sober. That helped with not asking me if I wanted a drink, or anything like that. And as great friends, they never did. My plan was really just setting boundries (not on the drinking) but on how far I was going to go into my situation. I do believe I will be camping with them all in time......but for now.....I had fun, and didn't drink.....it worked for day 3-4.

09-11-2012, 03:46 PM	#13 (permalink)
Mark75 Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 6,819	Oh, OK... You've got a sober friend, that is a good plan. Is your friend OK if you have to bail?

09-11-2012, 03:50 PM	#14 (permalink)
NoFireWater Clear Eyes Full Heart Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: New England Posts: 604	I agree with Hope4Life, it can be done. I just got back from a concert last weekend and had a great time not drinking. It was cool to remember every bit of the show, and not feel exhausted before it. You do have to have a plan though as it would be easy to cave. Mine was "I'll only drink if the musician is at the same table drinking with us" (which would never happen so I was safe lol) To me, part of being sober is being able to experience things that make me happy. I would have been angry and resentful if I had to miss the concert solely because I was worried about slipping up and drinking. Each person is different though, and you have to make your decision with a very clear mind. To some it would be a challenge, to others it would be an invitation to drink.

09-11-2012, 08:02 PM	#16 (permalink)
soberbythesea Member Join Date: Jul 2010 Posts: 585	I think you have to weigh whether you think this event will be a trigger for you. Personally, now that I'm on my third crack at sobriety, I am a lot more cautious. I've suddenly realized I don't know everything and that I can't necessarily handle situations I used to think would be no problem. I look back at some of my past posts here and cringe at the hubris/bravado/just plain stupidity of some of the things I thought I should be able to go and do. So, at this point in my own journey, I tend to side with those who say: stack the deck in your favor, not the dealer's, and avoid any and all situations you associate with drinking. At least for now. But I'm not you, so as I said, you need to weigh how you feel about it.

09-16-2012, 02:41 PM	#17 (permalink)
Hope4Life Member Join Date: Aug 2012 Location: California Posts: 193	How was the Concert? Just wondering if you had a good time at the STP show, so check in and let us know.... Best Wishes __________________ PROUD to be Alcohol Free!

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