Really bad day, really struggling - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

defyinggravity · 02-07-2012, 01:45 PM

Today has been a really tough day. I'm at work right now, but staying sober tonight is going to be really tough. I really just want to get high right now and forget about all the crap going on. Things at work are not going well - I keep screwing up stupid, simple things and I just can't seem to do anything right.

I know I should just let the feelings pass and that they aren't going to kill me if I do have to feel them. I'm just so miserable

I think I'll be around here a lot tonight!!

How do y'all deal with being miserable? Can you make it go away or do you just feel it until it passes?

**Dee74** · 02-07-2012, 02:00 PM

Life is full of great day, miserable days and run of the mill days, I think

I think it's pretty normal to feel foggy, confused, irritable and a little depressed in early recovery, though?

It's part of the healing process - it's the very first baby steps in moving from what you have been towards what you could be

IMO, the worst thing you could do would be to give in to that desire to get high, dG.

D

macknacat · 02-07-2012, 03:03 PM

1] no situation is so bad that i can't make it worse by picking up
2] i am always free to start my day over
3] the serenity prayer
4] when i have a string of screw ups i often have to regroup and ask myself "what is distracting me from being Aware...?"

flutter · 02-07-2012, 03:04 PM

Yep, some days do suck. And it's hard to experience them for what they are, especially when we've been on escape mode for years in our lives. But it's great that you came here, posted.. stick around, stay close. We totally understand.

Healthyfood · 02-07-2012, 03:06 PM

defyinggravity

I have noticed that being hungry, angry, lonely and tired these are the feelings I go through every day. I hope its common to have these emotions in early days. But the problem is that these feelings become an excuse to drink.
Left unattended just one of them could lead to relapse.

By continuing feeling miserable you are putting yourself at risk to drink again.
And its not worth it.

neferkamichael · 02-07-2012, 03:19 PM

Please just let the feelings pass, and they will. If you dont use tonight. god forbid, you'll be that much stronger tomorrow.

CaiHong · 02-07-2012, 03:20 PM

Defyingravity

Hang in there. I can understand that you want to drink to help you relax and forget about your day but it is never that simple for us alcoholics.

It will get better I promise you.
CaiHong

Threshold · 02-07-2012, 04:24 PM

Sometimes I can chase away or lessen some feelings by doing a reality check.

My thinking tends to be in extremes, all or nothing, great day/awful day, success/total fail.
Life is rarely ever like that and by doing a reality check I can often take away some of the sting.

Gratitude list. Sounds corny as anything, but it works. I sit there and think of an area of my life, even one that is going pretty crappy, and start listing all the issues and things in that area that I am grateful for. Or a decade in my life, or things in my room, or books I've read...I just pick a category and get busy. And I find out that there is a lot of wonderful in my world.

sometimes I just have to ride it out. I'm getting more used to that, I mean I have learned during these months clean that feelings are NOT going to harm me.

indakut · 02-07-2012, 04:30 PM

I TOTALLY understand you. I usually go to sleep. Hanging around the board will help you and in the process help someone else.

defyinggravity · 02-07-2012, 04:37 PM

Home from work now and SO glad to see my dog! Now there's something worth staying sober for.

defyinggravity · 02-07-2012, 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Threshold

My thinking tends to be in extremes, all or nothing, great day/awful day, success/total fail.
Life is rarely ever like that and by doing a reality check I can often take away some of the sting.

this sounds SO much like something my therapist would say!

***artsoul*** · 02-07-2012, 07:59 PM

I have to echo the responses here (gratitude, realizing that "this too shall pass," and playing the tape all the way through). When things would get really bad, I'd stop and think: "OK, you're feeling bad, so what? You're not in the hospital, you can still get around and be productive, you have enough to eat today, etc......." It kinda puts things in perspective.

One way to look at it is that you're feeling your feelings today - and for us, that's a positive thing!

02-07-2012, 01:45 PM	#1 (permalink)
defyinggravity Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: New Orleans, LA Posts: 236 Blog Entries: 52	Really bad day, really struggling Today has been a really tough day. I'm at work right now, but staying sober tonight is going to be really tough. I really just want to get high right now and forget about all the crap going on. Things at work are not going well - I keep screwing up stupid, simple things and I just can't seem to do anything right. I know I should just let the feelings pass and that they aren't going to kill me if I do have to feel them. I'm just so miserable I think I'll be around here a lot tonight!! How do y'all deal with being miserable? Can you make it go away or do you just feel it until it passes? __________________ I'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so. Some things I cannot change, but 'til I try I'll never know.

02-07-2012, 02:00 PM	#2 (permalink)
Dee74 SR Moderator Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Seas Posts: 46,751	Life is full of great day, miserable days and run of the mill days, I think I think it's pretty normal to feel foggy, confused, irritable and a little depressed in early recovery, though? It's part of the healing process - it's the very first baby steps in moving from what you have been towards what you could be IMO, the worst thing you could do would be to give in to that desire to get high, dG. D __________________ Between the failure and the masterpiece, the distance is one millimeter. Paul Gaugin

02-07-2012, 03:04 PM	#4 (permalink)
flutter Living sober since 12/18/08 Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Denver, CO Posts: 2,363	Yep, some days do suck. And it's hard to experience them for what they are, especially when we've been on escape mode for years in our lives. But it's great that you came here, posted.. stick around, stay close. We totally understand. __________________ They seemed to come suddenly upon happiness as if they had surprised a butterfly in the winter woods. ~Edith Wharton

02-07-2012, 03:19 PM	#6 (permalink)
neferkamichael Life Health Prosperity Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Louisana Posts: 708	Please just let the feelings pass, and they will. If you dont use tonight. god forbid, you'll be that much stronger tomorrow. __________________ Success is making yourself do the thing you need to do when you need to do it whether you like it or not.

02-07-2012, 04:30 PM	#9 (permalink)
indakut Member Join Date: May 2010 Location: Ohio Posts: 311	I TOTALLY understand you. I usually go to sleep. Hanging around the board will help you and in the process help someone else. __________________ April 1, 2011 WORRYING does not take away tomorrow's TROUBLES, it takes away today’s PEACE...

02-07-2012, 03:03 PM	#3 (permalink)
macknacat Member Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: in the shadow of the rockies Posts: 338	1] no situation is so bad that i can't make it worse by picking up 2] i am always free to start my day over 3] the serenity prayer 4] when i have a string of screw ups i often have to regroup and ask myself "what is distracting me from being Aware...?"

02-07-2012, 03:06 PM	#5 (permalink)
Healthyfood Member Join Date: Jul 2011 Posts: 511	defyinggravity I have noticed that being hungry, angry, lonely and tired these are the feelings I go through every day. I hope its common to have these emotions in early days. But the problem is that these feelings become an excuse to drink. Left unattended just one of them could lead to relapse. By continuing feeling miserable you are putting yourself at risk to drink again. And its not worth it.

02-07-2012, 03:20 PM	#7 (permalink)
CaiHong Member Join Date: Aug 2011 Posts: 929	Defyingravity Hang in there. I can understand that you want to drink to help you relax and forget about your day but it is never that simple for us alcoholics. It will get better I promise you. CaiHong

02-07-2012, 04:24 PM	#8 (permalink)
Threshold Grateful but still smarting Join Date: May 2009 Location: Arizona Posts: 1,297 Blog Entries: 19	Sometimes I can chase away or lessen some feelings by doing a reality check. My thinking tends to be in extremes, all or nothing, great day/awful day, success/total fail. Life is rarely ever like that and by doing a reality check I can often take away some of the sting. Gratitude list. Sounds corny as anything, but it works. I sit there and think of an area of my life, even one that is going pretty crappy, and start listing all the issues and things in that area that I am grateful for. Or a decade in my life, or things in my room, or books I've read...I just pick a category and get busy. And I find out that there is a lot of wonderful in my world. sometimes I just have to ride it out. I'm getting more used to that, I mean I have learned during these months clean that feelings are NOT going to harm me.

02-07-2012, 04:37 PM	#10 (permalink)
defyinggravity Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: New Orleans, LA Posts: 236 Blog Entries: 52	Home from work now and SO glad to see my dog! Now there's something worth staying sober for. __________________ I'm through accepting limits 'cause someone says they're so. Some things I cannot change, but 'til I try I'll never know.

02-07-2012, 07:59 PM	#12 (permalink)
*artsoul* Community Greeter Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Hattiesburg, Mississippi Posts: 5,867	I have to echo the responses here (gratitude, realizing that "this too shall pass," and playing the tape all the way through). When things would get really bad, I'd stop and think: "OK, you're feeling bad, so what? You're not in the hospital, you can still get around and be productive, you have enough to eat today, etc......." It kinda puts things in perspective. One way to look at it is that you're feeling your feelings today - and for us, that's a positive thing!

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