timetochange

I am having incredible urges, to the point where I am in tears. I know everyone says that this gets easier, and there are moments where it does seem easy, I just keep telling myself to look at the big picture and know that this will pass. I was seriously about to have a glass of wine, I opened the cabinet. Today is only my fourth day without drinking, and its actually been a good one - I worked out, I've eaten well, and something that I've been wishing for actually happened. So why? Why when good things are happening and I feel good, do I want to ruin it by drinking?? It's like I feel empty/bored, and I have NO reason to feel that way.
I woke up this morning so happy and proud of myself. I felt icky from eating too much on Thanksgiving, but I told myself, I'd rather eat too much than drink too much right now!
So, instead of drinking I came here, and I am reading and trying to understand what is happening to me, and how to do this differently this time, because I really, really want to.

24hrsAday

time IF you are an Alcoholic what you are going through is perfectly normal though it is of course uncomfortable. it DOES get better.. you just got to bite the bullet sometimes in the very early days..

Dee74

It does get better TTC - but it will take longer than 4 days - if you're like me you drank for years - it's a pretty ingrained part of our lives.

Support really helped me to get through those rough early days - if have real life support, nows the time to use it....if you're just using SR, really plug yourself in - help someone else too...that really helped me deal with my cravings.

There's also a technique call Urge Surfing that you might find useful
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...e-surfing.html
Mindfulness and Addiction: Part 3 | Mindfulness and Psychotherapy
D

Zebra1275

I was seriously about to have a glass of wine, I opened the cabinet.

It might be a good time to get rid of the wine in your house.

liamsdad

You, TTC, are my hero for the day. You fought off incredible urges and didn't drink. That is an incredible victory.

When I stopped drinking, for some reason (God maybe?) I never had the urge to drink again. I was a 36 year-old binge/bender drinker who never went back. Anyone who meets the struggle head-on, fights the urge to drink, and emerges sober another day is a strong person, indeed.

Thanks hero - and keep on. Dee's right. It takes some time, but it will be worth it!

Mike in Boston

soberjim

TimetoChange... Finished 10 days now I'm back at day 1. Point is I totally understand the urge part of this. In the a.m. you say 'not today' then later in the day the urges are there. A few of the days not so bad but then it beomes harder to ignore.

I found reading these posts very helpful. Many Many people have written here how they have moved through this part to a much better place. It is not easier, but I can tell you, Day 1 again is not a good place.

I am trying again, and will be successful, focusing on one day at a time.

You indicate you have worked out and are eating right. Keep going with this. I find I have to occupy my mind especially in the evenings. I too am trying to become more active in an effort to help with the cravings.

Others have said the cravings will get better. Take comfort in that, and trust that they will pass. This is what I am focusing on to help me.

Come here often! This will help you too.

Jim

Tigger41

Get up - leave the house - eat mustard by the spoonful - do whatever you need to not to drink just for today - just for this hour and the feeling will pass.

Day 22 here and some of those days in the first 2 weeks I had incredible urges - like I would actually lose my mind if I didn't have a drink. I avoided and I didn't go crazy.

Read these posts - read more - type more posts - again whatever you have to do not to drink it isn't worth it.

Anna

I found it really helpful to not have any alcohol in the house.

timetochange

I truly get a lot of my strength from coming on here. Reading others posts and responses to mine, as well giving what little I can give at this point, has gotten me through tonight. I drank more diet 7up than I should have, but it's ok for now! I also got out to the store with the kids (something I never would have done drinking because usually by this point I"m pretty buzzed) and actually painted a part of a bedroom.
As a few of you mentioned, a big thing I keep thinking about is how I want to feel tomorrow. And I have about 1/4 of a bottle of wine left in my cabinet and it's going down the sink tonight. You are right about that. I purposely kept it these four days in case I "needed" it. Needed??!!
Physically, I feel great. The first day I was hungover, but after that just a dull headache now my body just feels like it's getting back to normal. I am grateful that I don't have some of the withdrawl symptoms that some others do. For me, its habitual and psychological. I mean, I'm sure it's physical as well, since my body got so used to alcohol, but I don't feel my body actually craving it really, it's mostly just my mind.
I just keep telling myself, if I really want to change, if I really want my life to be better and different, then this has to be IT. I can't give in and have to start all over again another day.
And I find it truly amazing that through those horrific urges and all of the thoughts and feelings I had, I came on here and read exactly what I needed to and was reminded that I'm not alone. That others are going through exactly what I am right now, and so many have gone through it and succeeded and live happier fuller lives. The advice and support I feel here is immeasurable!!

Hevyn

I went through those times often in early recovery. Those feelings will come around less often & will be less intense - promise! I once couldn't make a move without alcohol in my system - now I rarely think of it. I never dreamed that day would come, but I've been free of it for almost 4 yrs. now. You can do it too!

It's great to hear you get so much out of being part of SR. It changed everything for me, too. Until I saw all the other Hev's there were out there, I felt totally alone in my misery. No one in my life got what I was going through. You're doing great!