I fell apart and drank tonight - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Katecan · 05-09-2008, 11:02 PM

I don't know why?

Katecan · 05-09-2008, 11:05 PM

Mother's day would have been a month.

Hope · 05-09-2008, 11:06 PM

Pick yourself up and start again. Don't beat yourself up.

Think back over the last week and try to figure out how you were feeling or anything that could have triggered this.

It's not the end of the world. Learn from it, grow stronger, and keep moving forward.

God is with you. You will be victorious. This is just a bump in the road. Keep focused on recovery.

Thinking of you and sending my prayers.

Hope · 05-09-2008, 11:10 PM

God loves you and remember this verse.

And nothing will ever separate you from my love again. Romans 8:38-39

Katecan · 05-09-2008, 11:14 PM

Thanks Hope4life. I am a believer 100% in the Christian God. I follow daily news about our world. Kinda a news junkie as well. I need to do something with my life. Getting sober and AA where I live is not going to be enough. I need more.

dgillz · 05-09-2008, 11:15 PM

We've all done this (or at least most of us). Like Hope said learn from it, and the next time you think about a drink do ANYTHING besides that. Are you in a program? Do you have anyone to call? This has saved my butt more than once.

**51anna** · 05-09-2008, 11:15 PM

Use this as a learning experience Kate.

Figure out what happened and you can prevent it from happening again.

Katecan · 05-09-2008, 11:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 51anna

Use this as a learning experience Kate.

Figure out what happened and you can prevent it from happening again.

What happened is the war breaking out in Lebanon. Israel's 60th birthday. Biblical things playing out, I'm a watcher. It scares me for some reason, I think somethings wrong with me because of my lack of faith. That's where I'm at and why I'm having problems. I have knowledge but lack real faith. I preach but lack fail myself. I can't stand that. I'm so unhappy in my life. I need to do something more.

Katecan · 05-09-2008, 11:40 PM

I made excuses. Idiot I am.

mtnmagic · 05-09-2008, 11:57 PM

Sweetie - I'm having a terrible time also right now. It really is ok. Please try to just stop. Yes, believe me I know how hard it is. I know the horrible anxiety of the day after. That anxiety will not last forever. Nor will the depression. Your faith is still there. It is just masked over right now. It really might be hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second. I do know how hard it is to stay sober. I've messed up more times then I could count. Keep posting if it helps. Stop drinking for just right now. Don't worry about later, tomorrow, or next week. Give yourself a little break. Promise you that while you do, the access to alcohol will not disappear. You can make that choice to go back anytime you want. For now, just give your mind, heart and soul a little rest, ok?

Hope · 05-10-2008, 12:06 AM

I agree with mtnmagic.

Give yourself a break for this moment.
It will always seem worse the day after. Everything is magnified so much more. It will pass.
Hang in there and get through this moment.

Stepping Stones

The Lord came to me like a dream one day and asked,
"why do you sorrow?"
I answered, "Lord my life is so full of pain,
I can't face one more tomorrow."

The Lord sat down beside me,
and gently took my hand.
He said,
"Let me explain to you and then you'll understand.

Each sorrow is a stepping stone
you must surmount each day,
And every stepping stone you climb
is a sorrow that's passed away.

The road of life is a mountainside,
with crevices in which to be caught,
But as you struggle on your way,
I, the Rock, will lend support.

Every stepping stone you climb,
makes spirit and heart grow strong.
Exercising character and faith
this road seems painful and long.

The way is paved with stepping stones,
to uplift your heart and soul,
Though difficult they aid your way,
to a City paved with gold.

I know that you are tired,
for I too have walked this way,
My sorrows did they multiply,
but I cleared the stones away.

I left my rock to lift you up,
I left behind my story.
To give you strength to make your climb,
to that special place in glory.

And never fear, the Rock is here,
You'll never climb alone
Surmount life's sorrows, continue on,
For they are but stepping stones.

"Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee;
He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved."
Psalms 55:22

Katecan · 05-10-2008, 12:13 AM

I'm ok. Thank you for being here. I'll check in tomorrow AM.

Love Kathy

Katecan · 05-10-2008, 12:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mtnmagic

Sweetie - I'm having a terrible time also right now. It really is ok. Please try to just stop. Yes, believe me I know how hard it is. I know the horrible anxiety of the day after. That anxiety will not last forever. Nor will the depression. Your faith is still there. It is just masked over right now. It really might be hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second. I do know how hard it is to stay sober. I've messed up more times then I could count. Keep posting if it helps. Stop drinking for just right now. Don't worry about later, tomorrow, or next week. Give yourself a little break. Promise you that while you do, the access to alcohol will not disappear. You can make that choice to go back anytime you want. For now, just give your mind, heart and soul a little rest, ok?

ok. I will. Thank you for helping me.

**CarolD** · 05-10-2008, 01:51 AM

Are you using a structured recovery program for your alcoholism?
AA helps me immensley in all the areas of my life.

You too can quit and stay quit.
Millions of us are doing just that.

StayinAlive · 05-10-2008, 02:07 AM

Don't give up Kathy, keep trying. I know what you mean about world events, i am in tune as well. Don't live in fear but surrender to the fact that you have no control over it. Its In his hands and he will step in when the world collectively admits they need him as ruler rather than man. Your concerns in this regard tell me you have some level of faith. Your main concern is sobriety at this time, everything else will fall into place. You can do it.

stone · 05-10-2008, 02:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katecan

I made excuses. Idiot I am.

We have ALL done it, Kate. The excuses too. The reason you drank is because you are an alcoholic or have a drink problem of some kind of magnitude.

You are not alone, you are not unique, you are not a bad person.

ken67 · 05-10-2008, 02:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katecan

What happened is the war breaking out in Lebanon. Israel's 60th birthday. Biblical things playing out, I'm a watcher. It scares me for some reason, I think somethings wrong with me because of my lack of faith. That's where I'm at and why I'm having problems. I have knowledge but lack real faith. I preach but lack fail myself. I can't stand that. I'm so unhappy in my life. I need to do something more.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the th

05-09-2008, 11:02 PM	#1 (permalink)
Katecan Let go, let God. Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Canada Posts: 245	I fell apart and drank tonight I don't know why?
	__________________ *I once was lost, but now I'm found* - Amazing Grace

05-09-2008, 11:05 PM	#2 (permalink)
Katecan Let go, let God. Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Canada Posts: 245	Mother's day would have been a month.
	__________________ *I once was lost, but now I'm found* - Amazing Grace

05-09-2008, 11:14 PM	#5 (permalink)
Katecan Let go, let God. Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Canada Posts: 245	Thanks Hope4life. I am a believer 100% in the Christian God. I follow daily news about our world. Kinda a news junkie as well. I need to do something with my life. Getting sober and AA where I live is not going to be enough. I need more.
	__________________ *I once was lost, but now I'm found* - Amazing Grace

05-09-2008, 11:15 PM	#6 (permalink)
dgillz Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Mobile, AL Posts: 872	We've all done this (or at least most of us). Like Hope said learn from it, and the next time you think about a drink do ANYTHING besides that. Are you in a program? Do you have anyone to call? This has saved my butt more than once.
	__________________ If the only tool in your toolbox is a hammer, then all your problems look like nails....

05-09-2008, 11:15 PM	#7 (permalink)
51anna Forum Leader Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Dancing in the Light Posts: 10,569	Use this as a learning experience Kate. Figure out what happened and you can prevent it from happening again.
	__________________ Anna "I don't know what the future is holding in store I don't know where Im going, Im not sure where Ive been Theres a spirit that guides me, a light that shines for me My life is worth the living, I don't need to see the end." John Denver

05-09-2008, 11:06 PM	#3 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 2,898	Pick yourself up and start again. Don't beat yourself up. Think back over the last week and try to figure out how you were feeling or anything that could have triggered this. It's not the end of the world. Learn from it, grow stronger, and keep moving forward. God is with you. You will be victorious. This is just a bump in the road. Keep focused on recovery. Thinking of you and sending my prayers.

05-09-2008, 11:10 PM	#4 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 2,898	God loves you and remember this verse. And nothing will ever separate you from my love again. Romans 8:38-39

05-09-2008, 11:40 PM	#9 (permalink)
Katecan Let go, let God. Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Canada Posts: 245	I made excuses. Idiot I am.
	__________________ *I once was lost, but now I'm found* - Amazing Grace

05-09-2008, 11:57 PM	#10 (permalink)
mtnmagic Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Lake Tahoe CA Posts: 338	Sweetie - I'm having a terrible time also right now. It really is ok. Please try to just stop. Yes, believe me I know how hard it is. I know the horrible anxiety of the day after. That anxiety will not last forever. Nor will the depression. Your faith is still there. It is just masked over right now. It really might be hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second. I do know how hard it is to stay sober. I've messed up more times then I could count. Keep posting if it helps. Stop drinking for just right now. Don't worry about later, tomorrow, or next week. Give yourself a little break. Promise you that while you do, the access to alcohol will not disappear. You can make that choice to go back anytime you want. For now, just give your mind, heart and soul a little rest, ok?

05-10-2008, 12:06 AM	#11 (permalink)
Hope Getting Better All The Time Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Recovering Posts: 2,898	I agree with mtnmagic. Give yourself a break for this moment. It will always seem worse the day after. Everything is magnified so much more. It will pass. Hang in there and get through this moment. Stepping Stones The Lord came to me like a dream one day and asked, "why do you sorrow?" I answered, "Lord my life is so full of pain, I can't face one more tomorrow." The Lord sat down beside me, and gently took my hand. He said, "Let me explain to you and then you'll understand. Each sorrow is a stepping stone you must surmount each day, And every stepping stone you climb is a sorrow that's passed away. The road of life is a mountainside, with crevices in which to be caught, But as you struggle on your way, I, the Rock, will lend support. Every stepping stone you climb, makes spirit and heart grow strong. Exercising character and faith this road seems painful and long. The way is paved with stepping stones, to uplift your heart and soul, Though difficult they aid your way, to a City paved with gold. I know that you are tired, for I too have walked this way, My sorrows did they multiply, but I cleared the stones away. I left my rock to lift you up, I left behind my story. To give you strength to make your climb, to that special place in glory. And never fear, the Rock is here, You'll never climb alone Surmount life's sorrows, continue on, For they are but stepping stones. "Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee; He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved." Psalms 55:22

05-10-2008, 12:13 AM	#12 (permalink)
Katecan Let go, let God. Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Canada Posts: 245	I'm ok. Thank you for being here. I'll check in tomorrow AM. Love Kathy
	__________________ *I once was lost, but now I'm found* - Amazing Grace

05-10-2008, 01:51 AM	#14 (permalink)
CarolD Forum Leader Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Dallas, Ga. USA Posts: 14,428	Are you using a structured recovery program for your alcoholism? AA helps me immensley in all the areas of my life. You too can quit and stay quit. Millions of us are doing just that.
	__________________ Each Day Sober Is A Victory!! Joy In AA Recovery...

05-10-2008, 02:07 AM	#15 (permalink)
StayinAlive Crazy Cat Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Left Coast Posts: 421	Don't give up Kathy, keep trying. I know what you mean about world events, i am in tune as well. Don't live in fear but surrender to the fact that you have no control over it. Its In his hands and he will step in when the world collectively admits they need him as ruler rather than man. Your concerns in this regard tell me you have some level of faith. Your main concern is sobriety at this time, everything else will fall into place. You can do it.
	__________________ never stop growing