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Old 02-28-2008, 02:16 PM   #1 (permalink)
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What to do besides drink / use drugs?

This is going to sound really strange but I really need some help here.

The weekend is fast approaching. Before I decided to quit drinking, I knew what I was going to be doing on Friday and Saturday night. Now that I am sobering up, I have no idea what I am going to do. I would like to do something fun but I cannot think of anything to do. I honestly can't remember ever doing anything besides drinking on the weekends. All my friends still drink so I cannot hang out with them.

So here's the question. What does everyone do for fun on Friday and Saturday nights besides drink or use drugs?

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Old 02-28-2008, 02:25 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Watch movies, read this forum. Get a cool thriller book to occupy the time. Go somewhere else - perhaps the mall eegads... an arcade. Drive to the country and do absolutely nothing but look around at stuff I haven't seen and drink lotsa coffee. Go visit a bookstore read a bunch of stuff and buy nothing - except coffee and doughnuts. What the heck, go visit 2 or 3 bookstores, stay active. Go around to all the health and nutrition stores to get an opinion from every clerk in the city on their opinion of the effectiveness of natural sleep aids. Start writing your own book. Perhaps an online blog... (you can do this at your profile here)... Call up someone you haven't talked to in a long long time - go visit them. Get a new boyfriend/husband. Strategize on starting a new business that you've always wanted to... Change the oil in your car. Change the oil in your friends car. Go visit a homeless shelter and/or volunteer yourself.

(and while you're doing all the above, watch all the sober people!)

Lol. That's a start!
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Old 02-28-2008, 02:37 PM   #3 (permalink)
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AA fellowship is a good way to spend your free time. Or find somewhere to volunteer?

Chin up, Soulja, and welcome! K
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Old 02-28-2008, 02:50 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Hi Soulja - where do you live in Washington? I live near Seattle and it's pretty nice outside right now (don't know about the weekend) but there's the public market, waterfront during the daytime. One of my favorite sober things to do at night is hit a starbucks and go to the bookstore.
You can also check the "Whats happening" section of the seattle times, they often post happenings on the weekends.

Hope this helps you out!

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Old 02-28-2008, 03:11 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Soulja, whatever you decide you are going to do (like go to the movies), make sure you actually do it, make a concrete plan and stick to it otherwise it is too easy to just decide not to and go get wasted instead. If possible, make plans that you cannot break, like with friends.

BTW- is this the Washingtonian's thread? woot woot! I live near Bellingham, go Vikings!
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Old 02-28-2008, 03:37 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Filling my "free time" in early sobriety (and many years thereafter) was a no-brainer for me...AA meetings...morning, noon, and night! There's a saying in AA, "Once you take the alcohol away from the alcoholic, you'd better have something to replace it." You'd be surprised at how many fun activities are planned by AA/NA groups.

Aside from AA/NA, there are a few things you can do on your own: movies, treat yourself to dinner, museums, sporting events, plan some travel with the money you'll save not drinking, skiing, dance lessons, adult classes, singles groups. Get creative in your activities...it may take some planning, but it will be worth the challenge. Let us know what you come up with.
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Old 02-28-2008, 03:40 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Right on Bellingham! I'm just south of Seattle!

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Old 02-28-2008, 03:44 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Try sitting quietly and giving complete attention to your breath, paying close attention to the inhalation and exhalation, see what comes up for you.
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Old 02-28-2008, 03:51 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Glad to see you again...

Try an AA meeting....just go listen.

Ask a friend to come over
and hang out.
No booze involved....make that clear.

A good way to see who your real
friends are ...not just bar buddies.

I do all sorts of interesting things
with AA friends.
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Old 02-28-2008, 05:30 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I got alot out of this thread...thanks
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Old 02-28-2008, 08:14 PM   #11 (permalink)
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go to aa, excercise at gym ( any will do, get the blood moving- a little sweat), working on a book and going to the bookstore, not going to bars, resturant right now. job hunting (yeah)
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Old 02-28-2008, 08:19 PM   #12 (permalink)
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JPAt,

Thanks for the response, I live near the Tacoma area. Great to see so many Washingtonians onboard.
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Old 02-28-2008, 08:24 PM   #13 (permalink)
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I'm also planning my exciting weekend (sarcasm). I've basically decided to stay in and rest, I feel emotionally + physically + mentally drained now that the worst part of withdrawal is hopefully over.
I plan to meditate, sleep, SR, sleep, read, order takeout, sleep, maybe do some yoga or light exercise. It's dawned on me that I've alienated most of my friends, I have no S.O., so I'll be alone. I'll try to put my time to good restorative use.
But I can see how this could become a problem further down the road. Lots of good ideas on this thread, thanks. I especially like the volunteering suggestion, maybe then I could meet new people.

Matt
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Old 02-28-2008, 10:13 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I second going to the gym! It helped me get rid of a lot of stress (which is one big reason why I drank)! Start out slow and go as often as you can - Who knows, you might make some new friends as well!
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Old 02-28-2008, 11:16 PM   #15 (permalink)
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There are a lot of good ideas on this string, I also find that coming up with a plan before a weekend is a good idea, especially early in recovery.

Other ideas that I can think of - hit a couple of AA meetings, that is a good way to start meeting sober people. If your from Tacoma, go to Seattle one day and hit a noon meeting then go for a walk around Greenlake. If AA isn't a part of your life and you have a vehicle, drive to North Bend or even Bellingham ; ) and check out the scenery.

Free time is tough to get through but the more weekends you get under your belt, the easier it will get.

Enjoy!
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Old 02-29-2008, 07:09 AM   #16 (permalink)
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hi. when i stopped drinking i was very board so i started gambling - big mistake.
i've only just reccently figured out that it's better to sit looking at the walls all day rather then drinking or gambling.
i'm unemployed at the moment so i have allot of free time. i watch movies. read books and magazines. listen to music. try to learn something new on the guitar. look stuff up on the internet. hang out on this forum. but like i said even if you have to study every crack and imperfection on the walls it still beats drinking.
take care.:ghug3
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Old 02-29-2008, 07:38 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Hello,
I have been trying to hit a meeting a day, at least for the first 90 days. also, I read quite alot, been trying to work out more. I play guitar, so I have been practicing some.. I guess what I am saying is just try to do things that you like that will occupy your time, or better yet, try to do some things that you have been meaning to do, but have not had the opportunity because of using. take care.
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Old 02-29-2008, 03:04 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Tacoma is great! Hopefully it'll be nice this weekend, maybe you can hit some of the nice parks or do something else fun outside! I know for me - the weekends can be a HUGE trigger, so I try to plan out the whole weekend with sober activities and stick to it. I ususally plan alot - because if I have a spare moment.... well you know!

Take care!
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Old 02-29-2008, 05:28 PM   #19 (permalink)
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one thing I learnt after I stopped getting outa my head was that I need to get outta my own head! I spend time with others in recovery and don't isolate.

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Old 03-01-2008, 02:09 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Suggestion: Pick up one of your childhood hobbies again. Think long and hard about something you enjoyed doing as a child and now do it as an adult. could be anything you were into....instruments, painting, a fish tank, you have to have a fish tank. hobbies my friend, things you dont have to do but you want to do.
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