introduction & my story - Page 13 - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

MagicMan08 · 06-10-2008, 08:05 AM

dude....what the hell......this came as a serious surprise to me...

Sooooo what are you gunna do now? How low is your bottom before you decide to make some changes? Hide your assets.......they cannot take what they can't find, only idiots hand over **** when they are in that spot.......

I shake my head, because i am also messing up really bad, but cmon, I at least have a job and worst case scenario i bike to somewhere warm and crash during the summer until i get enough money to get a place......

Good luck and if you want me to call you, give me your number in a pm and i will call you and take the bill........but you HAVE to make some changes pal........cmon now!

aldo1980 · 06-10-2008, 02:23 PM

i appriciate your concearn. but it's really too late to change now. if i had of known it really was going to end like this i should have done something before but now what's the point?
my electricty is getting disconected after tomorrow. my landlord's going to throw me out any day as i owe her 4 months. the debt collectors will take anything i have because i can't pay. my parents have said they won't help me and they don't want to have anything to do with me anymore. i had a few friends i was sure i could count on but they just blew me off too - that hurts allot because i would have done anything for them. i thought they were my friends.
what is their left to change now. it's kinda too late.
i'm going to be a drunk living on the streets soon

. i'm already dying.

RK2007 · 06-10-2008, 02:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aldo1980

As the final curtain is closing and the whole s**thouse is going down in flames the time has come to say farewell to you my friends.
I'd come here in search of understanding and help and advice and I recieved all that and more but i guess as i didn't give heed to your advice i'm now going to have to face the consequences.
It's only a matter of days now untill i will be living on the streets because they'll be taking my appartment away and in the meantime the debt collector may or may not come to take my guitars and any objects of value i have - it really doesn't matter now. I'm beyound caring. The battles are over.
I hope if nothing else my story may act as a reminder to you who have sobered up: i had been sober for 7 years. One drink and look where it took me: back to drugs; back to gambling; back to being a loner; back to hell.
Those of you who have been following me during the past months couldn't have been better. Yous did all yous could for me but maybe I didn't do anything for myself.

I eternally thank yous.
All the best to all of you.
Sincearly,
Aldo.

Aldo, drop me a PM dude. Time to get yourself out of this mess once and for all.

coming_clean · 06-10-2008, 11:57 PM

Aldo, I think you need help man, professional help,

Life is not about women and fun...it's hard working!

Tazman53 · 06-11-2008, 07:49 AM

Aldo are you full yet? What is it going to take for you to become willing to take any action needed to live?

I stood at the gates of Hell, the end........... death in sight, my back turned to the God of my understanding................... I cried because I saw my death beyond those gates and I was afraid! I had finally given up, I admitted defeat to that beast I call alcohol, it had beaten me.

I turned around and standing there was the God of my understanding with a tear in his eye.......... he had been there all along as I ignored him, he had offered me help over and over again and I refused him, he loves me with a fathers love, he cried because he had watched me for so long wanting to help me but I didn't need him or anyone else, I could beat the beast Alcohol alone.

I dropped to my knees, I told him that I had surrendered to the beast Alcohol, it had beaten me down to the point of me seeing my own death and I was afraid, I asked him for his help with all of the desparation of a drowning man grabbing at a life preserver. He smiled a loving smile at me...................... he picked me up and carried me away from the gates of hell and back to the light of life, all I had to do was ask for his help and do his will in my life and take the actions needed to sober up and become a better person.

We all have a Higher Power of our understanding, we simply need to seek Him/Her out with all the earnestness in our power and our Higher Power will provide.

Aldo you stand at the turning point.......... are you going to march through those Gates in front of you or are you going to admit defeat to the beast Alcohol and turn around?

aldo1980 · 06-11-2008, 08:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tazman53

Aldo you stand at the turning point.......... are you going to march through those Gates in front of you or are you going to admit defeat to the beast Alcohol and turn around?

i'm not an active alcoholic anymore (87 Days) i'm a gambler.
i've gone looking for god many times, but i don't think it's been to any avail.

Tazman53 · 06-11-2008, 08:28 AM

Quote:

i'm not an active alcoholic anymore (87 Days) i'm a gambler.

And you don't think that gambling can lead to death? Look where it is taking you right now. The solution is the same, just a different problem.

Have you made an honest and sincere search for a Higher Power of your understanding?

You already know there is a Power Greater then you........... gambling! Why would there not be a Power Greater then gambling?

**51anna** · 06-11-2008, 08:36 AM

Aldo,

Try the Salvation Army. Give them a call. I believe they will help you for free:

Command Headquarters: Via degli Apuli 39, 00185 Rome, Italy

Tel: [39] 06 4462614/06 4941089
Fax: [39] 06 490078
Email: Italy_Command@ity.salvationarmy.org

Hevyn · 06-11-2008, 09:04 AM

Aldo, I'm heartsick for you & at a loss for words to help. It's way too early in the game of life for you to accept defeat. You're so young, though I know you feel old and beaten down. Whatever pain & misery you're in now - there has to be a solution. Moving to another place sounds like it might be helpful, but not if your demons make the move with you. You need to find out why you are sabotaging yourself this way. Your presence here & the things you've shared have helped me get and stay sober. You matter on this earth. Please fight. Love, Joanie

aldo1980 · 07-10-2008, 04:11 PM

hi. i'm still here!
i've been lurking for a while.
i made a decession at the 11th hour to try to fix my life. so about a month ago i stopped gambling. i stopped smoking (cigarettes) too at the same time. for one month i had not gambled; not smoked; no alcohol and no drugs. it was great! i've even been very activly looking for a job.
i've paid off a significant proportion of my debts and i was doing fine, untill this evening.
i was talking with my dad earlier and he told me that i'm "going backwards" and he said "it's morally wrong that [i] use the money [my parents] and grandparents give [me] to pay [my] debts with".
so i was out tonight and i played the machines. i came home without a cent left

in retrospect i guess subconciously i must have been thinking that "if it's wrong for me to put the handouts i recieve to good use i may as well give it all away".
if that wans't bad enough i even smoked a cigarette.
i'm so angry at myself now.
how could my old man say i'm going backwards though! it wasn't fair. i'd been trying so f**kin hard!

Rusty Zipper · 07-10-2008, 06:13 PM

try again aldo... you have a taste of what clean living can be!

dont let anyone bring you down....

'To Thine own self Be true"

keep peeling that garlic clove aldo...

more good wishes!

rz

aldo1980 · 07-10-2008, 06:35 PM

hi!
how ya doin? are you having a nice summer?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rusty Zipper

try again aldo

don't worry, i will. starting tomorrow.

aldo1980 · 07-15-2008, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aldo1980

don't worry, i will. starting tomorrow.

sure.

Dee74 · 07-15-2008, 04:56 PM

Sorry to hear you're still struggling Aldo.

I'm sorry your dad upset you - it's gonna take a while of uninterrupted sobriety to change peoples view of you - you've probably reinforced that view now - that sucks, but that's just human nature. He'll come around when you prove you've changed.

I'm guessing you're still determined to do this on your own (it's possible - I do)...just never give up...and you have to be super tough on yourself and never give into temptation no matter what.

I hope you get to the point where you say 'never again...no reason is good enough' this time

D

Daddio · 07-15-2008, 10:42 PM

Hey Aldo. Remember me. I'm on your side Brother. Get strong OK!

aldo1980 · 07-22-2008, 05:40 PM

why am i so f**king forgetfull?
in this past month i've been trying not to gamble i've had a total of 5 relapses (for a total of about 500 euros lost)
i had another gambling relapse today. i had some money put aside so i could go to the R.E.M. concert tomorrow and i lost that

my bills are starting to accumulate again.
and if that's not bad enough i even smoked 3 cigrettes today.
i don't know what's wrong with me. why do i do these things for no reason.
the fact of the matter is i'm begining to fall and it's now just a question of time before i start drinking and/or drugging again.

06-10-2008, 02:23 PM	#302 (permalink)
aldo1980 Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: on the moon Posts: 783	i appriciate your concearn. but it's really too late to change now. if i had of known it really was going to end like this i should have done something before but now what's the point? my electricty is getting disconected after tomorrow. my landlord's going to throw me out any day as i owe her 4 months. the debt collectors will take anything i have because i can't pay. my parents have said they won't help me and they don't want to have anything to do with me anymore. i had a few friends i was sure i could count on but they just blew me off too - that hurts allot because i would have done anything for them. i thought they were my friends. what is their left to change now. it's kinda too late. i'm going to be a drunk living on the streets soon . i'm already dying.
	__________________ sober since 2008-03-16 soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/133465-introduction-my-story.html

06-10-2008, 11:57 PM	#304 (permalink)
coming_clean Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: the netherlands Posts: 229	Aldo, I think you need help man, professional help, Life is not about women and fun...it's hard working!
	__________________ “Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.” “You do anything long enough to escape the habit of living until the escape becomes the habit.” “If you suffer, thank God! -- it is a sure sign that you are alive.”

06-11-2008, 07:49 AM	#305 (permalink)
Tazman53 Follow Directions! Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Fredericksburg, Va. Posts: 6,758	Aldo are you full yet? What is it going to take for you to become willing to take any action needed to live? I stood at the gates of Hell, the end........... death in sight, my back turned to the God of my understanding................... I cried because I saw my death beyond those gates and I was afraid! I had finally given up, I admitted defeat to that beast I call alcohol, it had beaten me. I turned around and standing there was the God of my understanding with a tear in his eye.......... he had been there all along as I ignored him, he had offered me help over and over again and I refused him, he loves me with a fathers love, he cried because he had watched me for so long wanting to help me but I didn't need him or anyone else, I could beat the beast Alcohol alone. I dropped to my knees, I told him that I had surrendered to the beast Alcohol, it had beaten me down to the point of me seeing my own death and I was afraid, I asked him for his help with all of the desparation of a drowning man grabbing at a life preserver. He smiled a loving smile at me...................... he picked me up and carried me away from the gates of hell and back to the light of life, all I had to do was ask for his help and do his will in my life and take the actions needed to sober up and become a better person. We all have a Higher Power of our understanding, we simply need to seek Him/Her out with all the earnestness in our power and our Higher Power will provide. Aldo you stand at the turning point.......... are you going to march through those Gates in front of you or are you going to admit defeat to the beast Alcohol and turn around?
	__________________ All BB quotes are from the First Edition of the BB Follow directions! Sobriety date 18 Sept. 2006 Sober today thanks to AA

06-11-2008, 08:36 AM	#308 (permalink)
51anna Forum Leader Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Dancing in the Light Posts: 10,518	Aldo, Try the Salvation Army. Give them a call. I believe they will help you for free: Command Headquarters: Via degli Apuli 39, 00185 Rome, Italy Tel: [39] 06 4462614/06 4941089 Fax: [39] 06 490078 Email: Italy_Command@ity.salvationarmy.org
	__________________ Anna "I don't know what the future is holding in store I don't know where Im going, Im not sure where Ive been Theres a spirit that guides me, a light that shines for me My life is worth the living, I don't need to see the end." John Denver

07-10-2008, 04:11 PM	#310 (permalink)
aldo1980 Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: on the moon Posts: 783	hi. i'm still here! i've been lurking for a while. i made a decession at the 11th hour to try to fix my life. so about a month ago i stopped gambling. i stopped smoking (cigarettes) too at the same time. for one month i had not gambled; not smoked; no alcohol and no drugs. it was great! i've even been very activly looking for a job. i've paid off a significant proportion of my debts and i was doing fine, untill this evening. i was talking with my dad earlier and he told me that i'm "going backwards" and he said "it's morally wrong that [i] use the money [my parents] and grandparents give [me] to pay [my] debts with". so i was out tonight and i played the machines. i came home without a cent left in retrospect i guess subconciously i must have been thinking that "if it's wrong for me to put the handouts i recieve to good use i may as well give it all away". if that wans't bad enough i even smoked a cigarette. i'm so angry at myself now. how could my old man say i'm going backwards though! it wasn't fair. i'd been trying so f**kin hard!
	__________________ sober since 2008-03-16 soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/133465-introduction-my-story.html

06-10-2008, 08:05 AM	#301 (permalink)
MagicMan08 Stand-Up Guy Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Minnesota Posts: 269	dude....what the hell......this came as a serious surprise to me... Sooooo what are you gunna do now? How low is your bottom before you decide to make some changes? Hide your assets.......they cannot take what they can't find, only idiots hand over **** when they are in that spot....... I shake my head, because i am also messing up really bad, but cmon, I at least have a job and worst case scenario i bike to somewhere warm and crash during the summer until i get enough money to get a place...... Good luck and if you want me to call you, give me your number in a pm and i will call you and take the bill........but you HAVE to make some changes pal........cmon now!

06-11-2008, 09:04 AM	#309 (permalink)
Hevyn Member Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: On the beach! Ocean City, Maryland Posts: 724	Aldo, I'm heartsick for you & at a loss for words to help. It's way too early in the game of life for you to accept defeat. You're so young, though I know you feel old and beaten down. Whatever pain & misery you're in now - there has to be a solution. Moving to another place sounds like it might be helpful, but not if your demons make the move with you. You need to find out why you are sabotaging yourself this way. Your presence here & the things you've shared have helped me get and stay sober. You matter on this earth. Please fight. Love, Joanie

07-10-2008, 06:13 PM	#311 (permalink)
Rusty Zipper Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: my room in ct. Posts: 10,773	try again aldo... you have a taste of what clean living can be! dont let anyone bring you down.... 'To Thine own self Be true" keep peeling that garlic clove aldo... more good wishes! rz
	__________________ *Rule 62*

07-15-2008, 04:56 PM	#314 (permalink)
Dee74 warning contents may settle Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: far out. Posts: 8,408	Sorry to hear you're still struggling Aldo. I'm sorry your dad upset you - it's gonna take a while of uninterrupted sobriety to change peoples view of you - you've probably reinforced that view now - that sucks, but that's just human nature. He'll come around when you prove you've changed. I'm guessing you're still determined to do this on your own (it's possible - I do)...just never give up...and you have to be super tough on yourself and never give into temptation no matter what. I hope you get to the point where you say 'never again...no reason is good enough' this time D
	__________________ No More Groundhog Day!! Never argue with an idiot: they'll drag you down to their level - and beat you with experience....

07-15-2008, 10:42 PM	#315 (permalink)
Daddio Certified Scrabble Cheat! Join Date: May 2008 Location: The Hill City, MS Posts: 317	Hey Aldo. Remember me. I'm on your side Brother. Get strong OK!
	__________________ Daddio Sober Since 23 October 2006

07-22-2008, 05:40 PM	#316 (permalink)
aldo1980 Member Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: on the moon Posts: 783	why am i so fking forgetfull?** in this past month i've been trying not to gamble i've had a total of 5 relapses (for a total of about 500 euros lost) i had another gambling relapse today. i had some money put aside so i could go to the R.E.M. concert tomorrow and i lost that my bills are starting to accumulate again. and if that's not bad enough i even smoked 3 cigrettes today. i don't know what's wrong with me. why do i do these things for no reason. the fact of the matter is i'm begining to fall and it's now just a question of time before i start drinking and/or drugging again.
	__________________ sober since 2008-03-16 soberrecovery.com/forums/newcomers-recovery/133465-introduction-my-story.html