Weak

[wiscgirl30]

You guys must get so sick of people who say they will stop drinking, then come back and say they relapsed. For me, I go about 5 days till I feel better and then I think I can party again! This weekend I decided I was going to "drink responsibly". Well - that worked on Friday. Then Saturday? Its like I didn't even try. Wound up stumbling in at 5:30 a.m., not remembering that or the previous 3 hours. It just sucks SO BAD. I wish I could just drink like a normal person! But I can't. It sucks. The self-hatred sucks. It all sucks. Its embarrassing! And I just realized I am becoming a "regular" at the bar down the street - not really the person I want to be - at all. This BITES!

[leviathon]

Originally Posted by wiscgirl30

You guys must get so sick of people who say they will stop drinking, then come back and say they relapsed. For me, I go about 5 days till I feel better and then I think I can party again! This weekend I decided I was going to "drink responsibly". Well - that worked on Friday. Then Saturday? Its like I didn't even try. Wound up stumbling in at 5:30 a.m., not remembering that or the previous 3 hours. It just sucks SO BAD. I wish I could just drink like a normal person! But I can't. It sucks. The self-hatred sucks. It all sucks. Its embarrassing! And I just realized I am becoming a "regular" at the bar down the street - not really the person I want to be - at all. This BITES!

We don't become sick of people that continue to try, maybe a bit put out by those that keep drinking and give up. Everyone of us that has quit has struggled for sobriety. So long as you keep trying to quit, you deserve our support. For those that are still suffering and are not trying to stop, they deserve our empathy and understanding. We were all there once.

As for your attempt to moderate, as the big book says, some will have to try and learn for themselves whether or not this is possible. It is only by exploring our addiction that we really come to terms with it. Each of us has a sobriety path to walk. Some just have a more difficult one.

Peace, Levi.

[Chance]

My name is Vic and I am an addict! Glad to be here clean today. You know I was on a 5 day hump for awhile this year, I would come back and say I am done, I surrender. Yet in 5 days I would be high again. We have to reach a bottom before we are done, my bottom wasn't pretty at all, but yet I am so grateful for it. I remind myself everyday that I never want to go back there. I almost have 90 days now the most I have had since my relapse so if a junkie like me can do this deal Just For Today, anyone can do it. Glad that you are alive.

Love Vic

[aasharon90]

Hi wiscgirl. My name is sharon and im an Alcoholic. Thank you for sharing where u r today.

I tried sooooo many times to stop drinking on my own and I couldn't. Sure i love to drink because i liked the way i felt for awhile then HATED what it was doing to me. I HATED MY BEHAVIOR. I HATED I HAD NO CONTROL OVER MY DRINKING.

My body could not handle alcohol no matter how much i tried to drink it in moderation. My body like many have an allergic reaction to alcohol.

You know how some people cant eat seafood because of the iodine in it....i think thats whats in it....or they cant eat strawberries.....if they do they break out ot have an allergic reaction to it and get very sick.

It takes some to come in recovery and go out a number of times before they realize they have had enough and just surrender.

There r the first 3 STEPS we take as we begin our sober recovery.

Just take that first step today....

ADMITTED WE WERE POWERLESS OVER ALCOHOL AND OUR LIFE HAD BECOME UNMANAGABLE.

Does this apply to u u ask urself?

If so ur in the right place.

Just keep coming back here and others will be along shortly to share their own experiences with alcohol with you. You will read how as many times as they tried to control their drinking...it just didnt work. At least for me because i had tried sooooo many times before to only end up in a horrible accident then spiralling out of control and wanting to end my miserable life.

It took my family to step in to do for me what i couldnt do for myself. Family intervention took place where i entered rehab for 28 day allowing me to recieve the tools of recovery and the knowledge of how to stay sober ONE DAY AT A TIME.

Hang on tight and keep checking back here for more shares by wonderful caring people here in sober recovery.

[wiscgirl30]

I think I have already hit rock bottom, quite a few times. I know I am ready...but I just cant make promises right now. I will keep coming back here and reading and writing and listening....thanks guys....

[splendra]

Okay you are at the bottom..now put the shovel down....

[NEEDTOBESOBER]

I had read about a test you can give yourself to figure out if you can drink in moderation or not. You go into a bar have 2 drinks and that is it and then leave the bar if you cant do that you most likely have a drinking problem.

[Erin]

I did the same thing as you for months. Then I reached the point awhile ago that I just didn't want to do it anymore - for real this time.

This time - I have a plan for almost everyday and the weekend which works for me. Any empty time or the weekend big bad triggers. I have a plan about Thursday for Friday and Saturday.

One day at a time. That's all you can do.

Maybe you'll get sick of beating yourself up. It's pretty cyclical and self destructive. Maybe you've learned something from each relapse. There could be some positives so when you're ready to quit, you're ready.

[OnceNice]

WiscGirl

I undestand very much so.
I think they get tired of us too.
Heck I get tired of me. But I keep posting.
I'm right where you are. Have been for a long long time.

[NEEDTOBESOBER]

Don't beat yourself up over it, it took me several times to quit drinking and I would relapse and start over again, so keep trying and don't give up, I came to this site several months ago and did good for awhile then started drinking again and then didnt get on the site againg for awhile then came back when I became really serious and determined to quit and I am now been sober 14th day. DON'T GIVE UP

[MNGirlyGirl]

I have four months sobriety right now. It took me a year and a half to get here. That is the beauty of SR -- no one is here to judge. We've all been there and understand how cunning, powerful and baffling this disease is. Never give up trying.