amp123

Got to admit I've been over-eating all week. Maybe compensating for being around people drinking all the time. I tell myself that I deserve to at least eat whatever I feel like. That's OK but I feel slow and lethargic. Need to try to fit some exercise in as I'm sure I'm gaining weight.

Anyway, my house guests leave tomorrow morning but my Mum arrives from London in the afternoon to spend 10 days. When you have a house on the coast in Andalucia you tend to get a lot of visits over summer!

I used to look forward to this (plenty of excuses for drinking) but now I could do with a few "days off". On the bright side I think things are going to be quiet the last 15 days of August. I'm looking forward to spending a bit of time just with my family and getting back into a regular exercise routine.

Hope you're all enjoying the day

OMD

Hi all,
Sorry I was away for a bit, but I was mightily cheered when I read the extraordinary posts - congratulations on hitting up the big 100s! By my reckoning we are all now in the 100 club, which is just amazing on any level.

So what does that mean? It means we have all given our bodies a break, a true chance for them to be like they should be. Like IC I did a bit of reading up a while ago on what alcohol does and it's not for the faint hearted. Obviously everyone knows about the liver etc. but what goes on in the brain is pretty grim, especially over an extended period. Alcohol is more devastating than pretty much any other drug because most drugs only affect mainly one neurotransmitter, whereas alcohol affects a whole bunch, which is why you can feel happy, sad, depressed, anxious, out of control, clumsy, ad nauseum. But it gets worse, because there is a knock on effect with many of these causes. For example, check out the effect of alcohol on the dopamine pathway (caused by the impact of alcohol on the GABA, so it's indirect). Get this, your brain tells you alcohol is great, but that signal only appears in the pathway, it doesn't actually increase the dopamine level, so even that is a con. But of course it's a reward pathway so your brain says I'll have some more of that please, which at the same time massively affects other neurotransmitters that influence things like our anxiety levels etc. so not only are you utterly conning yourself, you make yourself suffer all sorts of other stuff at the same time.

I am no scientist and so have no real way of knowing whether much of what I have read is in fact accurate but it seems plausible and fits exactly with my own experiences. Ho hum.

Anyway, enough of that I guess. We're all on the right track now and yes I do think about drinking every day but I had an evening a couple of days ago when I didn't think about it at all - just didn't think about it - and it was one of those days when I'd have happily sunk a couple of bottles of wine in no time. But I am not generally thinking about it in the same way I was after a couple of weeks, that's for sure. Mostly, take your fancy labels and shove that sh:! up your ass is how I feel. There is still booze all around me but that really doesn't bother me - I am enjoying having my life back, and I know 100% that I owe a lot to you all for having this chance.

Best wishes
OMD
P.s. Swimming improving, relationships all improving. I feel lucky.

Incontrol15

Yeppo OMD. We will get there. Neurotransmitters are in a delicate balance. Happiness, calmness, focus, interests, confidence...every feeling we have is a result of neurotransmitters. GABA, acetylcholine, dopamine, glutamate, serotonin, norepinephrine are all the transmitters. Alcohol and alcohol related issues mess with all of them.

It's a proven fact that alcohol also shrinks the brain and alcoholics increases the likelihood of Alzheimer's a few times over.

The good news is, for most of not all of us, the damage is not permanent. That's the scary part....it could be permanent damage if we didn't drop the bottle.

Being sober is a marathon. One that actually gets easier the longer we're in it.



Well...weekend is over. Off to bed. Smoked my last cig tonight. Mark your calendars. 8/2/15 was my last smoke.

See ya'll on the flip side.

ZaBoozer

Good morning all, catch up laggers

amp123

Morning all!

Thanks OMD and Inc for the heads up on the neurological angle. I've started doing a little reading myself. Broadly the conclusion I have arrived at so far is "thank God I'm not killing myself anymore!!"

Alcohol certainly is a tricky beast and the way it cons us back into the fold is scary. Now on 15 weeks I feel I have regained control of my life. Everything is better even if, as Inc said, I don't feel quite right or absolutely myself all of the time. There are struggles behind and more to come, I'm sure but I am beginning to believe another way is possible for me.

Remember Monday is a fun day, guys!!!

Incontrol15

Up and atom.

None for me today

Lily123

Fun day Monday it is hope everyone is doing well this morning.

amp123

Hey guys. Waiting to pick up my Mum at Gibraltar airport. Her flight is delayed so sipping a coffee and googling stuff.

Just stumbled on this article... Well, stumbled is a little inaccurate given that my last 5 searches have keywords like, alcohol, gaba, sobriety, long-term effects,etc in them.

Anyway, just found this short article which I thought was worth sharing

http://serenity-houses.org/2013/09/f...staying-sober/

I'd be interested in reading any interesting links the rest of you come across if you feel like sharing

All the best, class

OMD

Greetings fellow soberlings,
So I've been thinking about IC's idea about stopping drinking being a marathon except it gets easier. I like this - starting at the end and slowly getting fitter and faster. Awesome. The conventional saying about marathons is that it is 20 miles of hope and 6 of reality. Being sober is 26 miles of ever improving reality.

So that's us. Getting fitter and faster. And you never knew

OMD

OMD

Hope you get through your non smoking day IC. It's a nasty addiction. Just think of you getting fitter and faster by the hour

OMD

Angie247

Hi everyone. I'm doing well. Have not slept great the past two nights but I'll probably make up for it tonight. Things are going very well. I'm trying not to think about negatives and what bad things could happen in the future. I've done that for years and I'm tired of it. I'm feeling my sense of humor coming out more and more. It's so nice to laugh again and not have it be a fake laugh. Also, I tasted a red vine today at work and it was amazing! For years, I thought they had no taste and was puzzled that my coworkers loved them so much. I didn't think my taste had been affected like I heard it had to others but I think it did. I'm trying to be better on my diet so I only had that one but I'm gonna get another one tomorrow. She got the big tub of them. They're pretty great. Hope everyone is doing well. I might catch one movie on Netflix and then call it a night.

Incontrol15

Amp...that's a good idea of posting links. Thanks for sharing. Sounds like your searching the same stuff I am! I know the answer is simple...don't drink and do drugs, eat well, exercise.

I find searching all the stuff I'm searching keeps me centered. I find it comforting in a way that the healing has only really begun. As long as where I am is not where I'm going to be, I'm happy.

OMD...thank you. For marathon comment and smoking. I did smoke some today. So ya'll can erase the date. I am working on a plan though. Taking wellbutrin again. That'll help. I scheduled an appointment with my shrink to review my meds. I'm finding stress and anxiety is my biggest obstacle. I need to approach from all angles.

Lilly...hope you had a great day too

ZaBoozer

Good morning all, catch up laggers

Olivia2011

Thanks for the article Amp! More good articles buried in that article too!

Cauliflower

Good Morning, happy Tuesday.
Our August long weekend went very well. Who ever says quitting drinking during the summer while living in cottage country is impossible, better think again. It's going extremely well for me, jus' saying.

I also love the conversation about the brain, need to read more about that issue. I suppose we are all struggling to figure ourselves out. I was out the other evening at that birthday party with my husband and I surprised myself yet again. I mean, I was feeling confident, talking, engaging in conversation, laughing and acting silly, with a group of women who I just met. I thought I was a shy, quiet, introvert, who needed alcohol to open up. I guess not! I do have my moments of awkwardness, but that is just me as well. I have to read that article, but I wonder is we can train our brain back to healthy, so to speak?

Off to the races, we have a real busy week ahead, so I will be just popping in here and there, but will check in every morning, even to say say hi!

SwimKim12

Hi, All. Just checking in. My mood has been all over the place the last few days. Major stress at work at the end of the week, then a relaxing wknd, then more stress yesterday. I was in such a foul mood at work. Then I just felt so down in the dumps after work. AV tried to convince me that alcohol would make the feeling go away. I argued with it for awhile and ultimately decided that alcohol would not make me feel better, and then I would have to start all over on day one and tell you guys what happened. That was not worth it to me. Instead I got to wake up without a hangover and feeling normal today. I'm going to eat well today and go to the gym. Those two things are key to making me feel well. Thank you all for being here and holding me accountable!

OMD

Hi all,
Calm before yet another storm so I am happily able to check in and see how everyone is doing. Seems like ups and downs - just like real life! Glad you didn't bother with the booze Kim, nothing in it for ya, as well you know. IC I am not going to give you any advice about meds and nicotine I just wish you luck and strength.

Me? Lots and lots of work nonsense but that's all fine really. Most important things are falling back into place thankfully. My exercising is also coming in nicely - often a swim and a cycle before work, and a cycle afterwards, alternating with a run on some days. I'm going to stop here before I start sounding too smug. I do have some serious drinking challenges starting next week - I probably mentioned them ages ago - but I have my plan and I'm going to stick to it.

I hope you are all well.

OMD

amp123

Good luck with those challenging situations OMD. You know where we are if you need us! Glad to hear all is well with you otherwise

Lily123

Hi everybody the last several days have been challenging. I didn't drink but I did fall back on another unhealthy behavior. I'm not really sure what happened. Everything seems to be fine but the urge to drink has been strong. I stayed over at my grandparents the last 2 nights and that seemed to help a little. I'll be staying over there (on and off) the next 2 months, which is good.

Hope you are all doing well this evening/morning/night take care.

ZaBoozer

Good morning all, catch up laggers.