One Year and Under Club Part 40
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,327
I really could do with some pointers as to how to work on my self forgiveness and acceptance
Any suggestions would be great fully received.
It's as though if i start to feel a tiny bit happy then I rake up past stuff and pull myself to pieces.
Xx
Any suggestions would be great fully received.
It's as though if i start to feel a tiny bit happy then I rake up past stuff and pull myself to pieces.
Xx
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: England
Posts: 808
Thanks guys 
I'm just giving the house a complete clean. It's astonishing just how quickly I completely go off the rails if I so much as have ONE drink. It's like just a blue and before I know it i'm ringing in 'Sick' to work and buying cider in the morning. RIDICULOUS. Sober, i try to be the most reliable and supportive person imaginable, when drunk I just become everything I truly hate. I will not despair. I CAN fix this, I WILL fix this.
This drug is absolute POISON to me, I have to stop these relapses happening or they will actually kill me or do irreparable damage. The AV is trying to convince me that the fight is hopeless, but i've been here before and I get stronger each time.
Thank you so much for the continued guidance and support everyone.
I wouldn't be able to do this without you.
I'm just giving the house a complete clean. It's astonishing just how quickly I completely go off the rails if I so much as have ONE drink. It's like just a blue and before I know it i'm ringing in 'Sick' to work and buying cider in the morning. RIDICULOUS. Sober, i try to be the most reliable and supportive person imaginable, when drunk I just become everything I truly hate. I will not despair. I CAN fix this, I WILL fix this.This drug is absolute POISON to me, I have to stop these relapses happening or they will actually kill me or do irreparable damage. The AV is trying to convince me that the fight is hopeless, but i've been here before and I get stronger each time.
Thank you so much for the continued guidance and support everyone.
I wouldn't be able to do this without you.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: England
Posts: 808
Petals I find it helps to think that the past belongs in the past, absolutely everyone on earth has made mistakes in the past, what counts is your ability to keep growing. Sooner or later you'll learn to allow yourself to like yourself
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Petals, I agree with LS. From this point on you will start becoming the person you aspire to be. With other people, your actions will eventually speak louder than words.
I tend to beat myself up, too. None of us has the market cornered: scratch the surface and everybody's done things they're not proud of. There's a thought that consoles me: anybody in my exact circumstances would have done the same things.
But now I have a clean slate. My HP has forgiven me, so there's no reason why I should not forgive myself. What's done in the past is done; it's time to start building a better life now.
I tend to beat myself up, too. None of us has the market cornered: scratch the surface and everybody's done things they're not proud of. There's a thought that consoles me: anybody in my exact circumstances would have done the same things.
But now I have a clean slate. My HP has forgiven me, so there's no reason why I should not forgive myself. What's done in the past is done; it's time to start building a better life now.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 2,294
I am a beat myself up person, I have a doctorate in it. 
Drank to dull the pain and get out of myself. Now that I am sober, I see the challenge I have. My last few days of darkness (sorry for the drama) are a reminder that it will be an ongoing one.
Getting out my personal covenant exercises... where I make agreements with myself on positive attributes and actions.
Drank to dull the pain and get out of myself. Now that I am sober, I see the challenge I have. My last few days of darkness (sorry for the drama) are a reminder that it will be an ongoing one.
Getting out my personal covenant exercises... where I make agreements with myself on positive attributes and actions.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,179
Petals, self forgiveness and acceptance...no prob, day at the beach, as easy as learning and teaching the theory of relativity...E=MC2....kidding.
To be serious: They both are so important in expanding beyond just physically not drinking to searching for an emotional and spiritual (not religious) sobriety as well.
For me, when I started this last sober journey that is approaching 17 months, I had set no goals. I was just hungry to learn as much about sobriety as possible. I was convinced that alcohol was but a symptom of my disease and to set this right I needed to fix my thinking, which was the bigger issue. It was my flawed thinking that always sent me out there drinking.
One of the earliest concepts I embraced was that of rigorous honesty. While the word rigorous does allow for some slack, I choose to TRY to replace it with TOTAL honesty. In everything, with everyone, INCLUDING MYSELF...ALL THE TIME. Not only was I fooling others...but I could pull the wool over my own eyes faster than the speed of sound. The craziest part is, till I focused on this aspect of complete honesty, I had no idea how often I was fooling MYSELF and others.
With that in place for a period of time I began to understand what "WE ARE ONLY AS SICK AS OUR SECRETS" really meant. Shed your secrets and out blossoms freedom. Yes, it is amazing. Once there is NOTHING to hide you become free.
Then, for me, that freedom opened the door for forgiveness...for others and for my past deeds. Again, this won't happen overnight, but gradually it will take hold and you will find it easier to forgive.
On the acceptance issue, my barometer is the Serenity Prayer:
God (or HP of your choosing), grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
Learning to accept needs to be prefaced by what I feel I can or cannot control, and, most importantly, the wisdom to know and understand the difference. Gaining that wisdom requires me to sole search (kidding, see I'm a jokester), soul searching, the wisdom and guidance of others, then finally asking for help from a higher power...which I presently call "The Universe".
Once an issue, situation is deemed out of my control, it requires acceptance. Acceptance for me can range from the simple, almost mundane thought that all I can accomplish on a current project TODAY is x, and be cool with the fact that I cannot do Y, or complete it. Worked wonders for my ALL OR NOTHING attitude and way. To the more complex of accepting and forgiving my parents for aspects of a crappy childhood.
I look for the good in myself and others now with purpose. I focus as much energy as possible on the events of just today. Yes, I not only look to not drink one day at a time...I LIVE everything all aspects of my life daily. I don't forget the past...I use it as a lesson learned, but I won't regret it...FREEDOM came from owning all aspects of my past...good, bad and at times oh so ugly.
Also, a big part of achieving forgiveness and acceptance is establishing an attitude of gratitude. I have started to approach gratitude slightly different these past couple months too. I no longer list the constants. Sure I am grateful for my two amazing daughters, my health, my family and friends...etc...but I funnel it down to looking at what is it that I am grateful for TODAY.
Example: Today I am grateful that I can drive to my sales calls and pitch the stuff I love to pitch, my clean, pressed and starched white shirt, tie and suit (for 6 months this somewhat simple act was taken away). The friends in recovery that I will interact with today, the workout facility in the hotel because it is cold out, and the ability to hopefully help another alkie. I can't keep my sobriety unless I find ways to pass it on.
Sorry for the long response...for me, that was a very complex question and my ability to be concise is challenged at times. Bottom line, my best to you as you travel this amazing sober journey that can lead to a joyous, happy and free lifetime!
Well, again, I have gone over my personal quota of words on one response. So, off I travel on my day of amazing fun in Pitchville...home again, home again.
Haha, one last tidbit. As I mentioned earlier on here, I am spending the weekend with my youngest daughter at her school. As I was typing this she texted to asked if I wanted to play pickup hoops at the gym with her new BF rather than just against her. I accepted. Perhaps not the smartest idea I have had lately...playing hoops against a bunch of young college men early on a Saturday morning. If they are doing this for fun on a Saturday morning following any Friday night at college, they must be serious about the game.
Hey, enjoy the day, Undies.
Carlos
To be serious: They both are so important in expanding beyond just physically not drinking to searching for an emotional and spiritual (not religious) sobriety as well.
For me, when I started this last sober journey that is approaching 17 months, I had set no goals. I was just hungry to learn as much about sobriety as possible. I was convinced that alcohol was but a symptom of my disease and to set this right I needed to fix my thinking, which was the bigger issue. It was my flawed thinking that always sent me out there drinking.
One of the earliest concepts I embraced was that of rigorous honesty. While the word rigorous does allow for some slack, I choose to TRY to replace it with TOTAL honesty. In everything, with everyone, INCLUDING MYSELF...ALL THE TIME. Not only was I fooling others...but I could pull the wool over my own eyes faster than the speed of sound. The craziest part is, till I focused on this aspect of complete honesty, I had no idea how often I was fooling MYSELF and others.
With that in place for a period of time I began to understand what "WE ARE ONLY AS SICK AS OUR SECRETS" really meant. Shed your secrets and out blossoms freedom. Yes, it is amazing. Once there is NOTHING to hide you become free.
Then, for me, that freedom opened the door for forgiveness...for others and for my past deeds. Again, this won't happen overnight, but gradually it will take hold and you will find it easier to forgive.
On the acceptance issue, my barometer is the Serenity Prayer:
God (or HP of your choosing), grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
Learning to accept needs to be prefaced by what I feel I can or cannot control, and, most importantly, the wisdom to know and understand the difference. Gaining that wisdom requires me to sole search (kidding, see I'm a jokester), soul searching, the wisdom and guidance of others, then finally asking for help from a higher power...which I presently call "The Universe".
Once an issue, situation is deemed out of my control, it requires acceptance. Acceptance for me can range from the simple, almost mundane thought that all I can accomplish on a current project TODAY is x, and be cool with the fact that I cannot do Y, or complete it. Worked wonders for my ALL OR NOTHING attitude and way. To the more complex of accepting and forgiving my parents for aspects of a crappy childhood.
I look for the good in myself and others now with purpose. I focus as much energy as possible on the events of just today. Yes, I not only look to not drink one day at a time...I LIVE everything all aspects of my life daily. I don't forget the past...I use it as a lesson learned, but I won't regret it...FREEDOM came from owning all aspects of my past...good, bad and at times oh so ugly.
Also, a big part of achieving forgiveness and acceptance is establishing an attitude of gratitude. I have started to approach gratitude slightly different these past couple months too. I no longer list the constants. Sure I am grateful for my two amazing daughters, my health, my family and friends...etc...but I funnel it down to looking at what is it that I am grateful for TODAY.
Example: Today I am grateful that I can drive to my sales calls and pitch the stuff I love to pitch, my clean, pressed and starched white shirt, tie and suit (for 6 months this somewhat simple act was taken away). The friends in recovery that I will interact with today, the workout facility in the hotel because it is cold out, and the ability to hopefully help another alkie. I can't keep my sobriety unless I find ways to pass it on.
Sorry for the long response...for me, that was a very complex question and my ability to be concise is challenged at times. Bottom line, my best to you as you travel this amazing sober journey that can lead to a joyous, happy and free lifetime!
Well, again, I have gone over my personal quota of words on one response. So, off I travel on my day of amazing fun in Pitchville...home again, home again.
Haha, one last tidbit. As I mentioned earlier on here, I am spending the weekend with my youngest daughter at her school. As I was typing this she texted to asked if I wanted to play pickup hoops at the gym with her new BF rather than just against her. I accepted. Perhaps not the smartest idea I have had lately...playing hoops against a bunch of young college men early on a Saturday morning. If they are doing this for fun on a Saturday morning following any Friday night at college, they must be serious about the game.
Hey, enjoy the day, Undies.
Carlos
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 1,491
Day 80 today woo-hoo!!!! I am so grateful for SR and know I would not have gotten this far without the support of this amazing sober family!
I personally am considering my first 100 days as my "blast off phase". During that time I am allowing myself extra treats (like sweets, etc.). I am still consuming way less calories than by drinking. I know I will start to ween off of that but I really needed something to keep me motivated like little treats for myself.
Also, during my "blast off phase" I am celebrating every 10-day milestone (10,20,30....80,90,100). Keeps me looking forward to the next milestone without getting overwhelmed (30 day milestones were too long of a stretch for me).
Just sharing my personal experience. Everyone is different and we must do whatever it takes to stay on the right path.
At 100 days I will re-assess and see if I still need 10 day milestones or maybe start increasing it to 15 or 20 day increments. Important thing is I will stay flexible. One month I may feel strong the next I may not.
I've noticed with my AV that the first few weeks were the toughest and then [weeks 5 thru 9] I was sort of on cruise control and almost forgot about drinking altogether (which can also be dangerous if we let our guard down too much!).
The past 1-2 weeks my AV has woken up and really tried to derail me. The difference was that the first few weeks it was a physical need to drink (like withdrawals), but now it is mostly psychological, which I am able to talk myself out of with a clear sober mind and no physical need to drink. Also of course getting support here on SR is priceless.
Another tool I have been using to stay on the right path and not get derailed is when my AV strikes I ask myself: Am I hungry? Most of the time YES! I mistake hunger for craving. I eat a nice healthy meal and the cravings melt away. If that does not fully work, then I know I am tired and need to get some rest and check in on SR and/or a Face-to-face meeting (I do LifeRing meetings once a week or so).
Anothervery powerful tool is "playing the tape out" and imagining how I will feel tomorrow if I drink today. WOW that really puts the brakes on!! Not worth it !!!!!!
Not sure exactly where I was going with this post but as always it feels very healing to just share stuff with you all as I know you all understand.
Must get back to work now. Really appreciate you all listening.
Love and hugs from Northern California,
Chris
I personally am considering my first 100 days as my "blast off phase". During that time I am allowing myself extra treats (like sweets, etc.). I am still consuming way less calories than by drinking. I know I will start to ween off of that but I really needed something to keep me motivated like little treats for myself.
Also, during my "blast off phase" I am celebrating every 10-day milestone (10,20,30....80,90,100). Keeps me looking forward to the next milestone without getting overwhelmed (30 day milestones were too long of a stretch for me).
Just sharing my personal experience. Everyone is different and we must do whatever it takes to stay on the right path.
At 100 days I will re-assess and see if I still need 10 day milestones or maybe start increasing it to 15 or 20 day increments. Important thing is I will stay flexible. One month I may feel strong the next I may not.
I've noticed with my AV that the first few weeks were the toughest and then [weeks 5 thru 9] I was sort of on cruise control and almost forgot about drinking altogether (which can also be dangerous if we let our guard down too much!).
The past 1-2 weeks my AV has woken up and really tried to derail me. The difference was that the first few weeks it was a physical need to drink (like withdrawals), but now it is mostly psychological, which I am able to talk myself out of with a clear sober mind and no physical need to drink. Also of course getting support here on SR is priceless.
Another tool I have been using to stay on the right path and not get derailed is when my AV strikes I ask myself: Am I hungry? Most of the time YES! I mistake hunger for craving. I eat a nice healthy meal and the cravings melt away. If that does not fully work, then I know I am tired and need to get some rest and check in on SR and/or a Face-to-face meeting (I do LifeRing meetings once a week or so).
Anothervery powerful tool is "playing the tape out" and imagining how I will feel tomorrow if I drink today. WOW that really puts the brakes on!! Not worth it !!!!!!
Not sure exactly where I was going with this post but as always it feels very healing to just share stuff with you all as I know you all understand.
Must get back to work now. Really appreciate you all listening.
Love and hugs from Northern California,
Chris
Working-cl*** pseudo tough
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 485
Originally Posted by LonelyShadow 
Hello all, I'm sorry to say I'm back at Day 1, ready to finally find what I need to make this last. I had 85 days before relapsing this time, before that it was 155 days. I need to have a good think about what lead me to relapse, looking back I realise I had mentally and emotionally relapsed long before the actual relapse.
Right now I just need to get back into recovery mode. Lots of water and green tea!
Hope everyone is doing better than I am today, haha
Right now I just need to get back into recovery mode. Lots of water and green tea!
Hope everyone is doing better than I am today, haha
Carlos, another excellent post to Petals. Keep on using up your word quota.
Drake, know its been a tough few days, but hoping whatever blueness has grabbed you is starting to let go. Though sadly, we must consider that that brain we have sitting in our head keeps us alive, yet is our own worst enemy. And it is for the rest of our lives. So coming to some sort of peace with it is a key factor is staying sober.
Petals, I've also been working on self-forgiveness, even though I didn't realize I needed it. Although I'm not sure if I'm 100% there, I have have felt better over the last two weeks than I have since I've been sober. If you have a chance, possibly read my last blog post, and definitely watch the embedded video.
Just because we know we are not at fault doesn't mean that we believe it.
Working-cl*** pseudo tough
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 485
Originally Posted by calichris
Day 80 today woo-hoo!!!! I am so grateful for SR and know I would not have gotten this far without the support of this amazing sober family!
I personally am considering my first 100 days as my "blast off phase". During that time I am allowing myself extra treats (like sweets, etc.). I am still consuming way less calories than by drinking. I know I will start to ween off of that but I really needed something to keep me motivated like little treats for myself.
Also, during my "blast off phase" I am celebrating every 10-day milestone (10,20,30....80,90,100). Keeps me looking forward to the next milestone without getting overwhelmed (30 day milestones were too long of a stretch for me).
Just sharing my personal experience. Everyone is different and we must do whatever it takes to stay on the right path.
At 100 days I will re-assess and see if I still need 10 day milestones or maybe start increasing it to 15 or 20 day increments. Important thing is I will stay flexible. One month I may feel strong the next I may not.
I've noticed with my AV that the first few weeks were the toughest and then [weeks 5 thru 9] I was sort of on cruise control and almost forgot about drinking altogether (which can also be dangerous if we let our guard down too much!).
The past 1-2 weeks my AV has woken up and really tried to derail me. The difference was that the first few weeks it was a physical need to drink (like withdrawals), but now it is mostly psychological, which I am able to talk myself out of with a clear sober mind and no physical need to drink. Also of course getting suppirt here on SR is priceless.
Another tool I have been using to stay on the right path and not get derailed is when my AV strikes I ask myself: Am I hungry? Most of the time YES! I mistake hunger for craving. I eat a nice healthy meal and the cravings melt away. If that does not fully work, then I know I am tired and need to get some rest and check in on SR and/or a Face-to-face meeting (I do LifeRing meetings once a week or so).
Not sure exactly where I was going with this post but as always it feels very healing to just share stuff with you all as I know you all understand.
Must get back to work now. Really appreciate you all listening.
Love and hugs from Northern California,
Chris
I personally am considering my first 100 days as my "blast off phase". During that time I am allowing myself extra treats (like sweets, etc.). I am still consuming way less calories than by drinking. I know I will start to ween off of that but I really needed something to keep me motivated like little treats for myself.
Also, during my "blast off phase" I am celebrating every 10-day milestone (10,20,30....80,90,100). Keeps me looking forward to the next milestone without getting overwhelmed (30 day milestones were too long of a stretch for me).
Just sharing my personal experience. Everyone is different and we must do whatever it takes to stay on the right path.
At 100 days I will re-assess and see if I still need 10 day milestones or maybe start increasing it to 15 or 20 day increments. Important thing is I will stay flexible. One month I may feel strong the next I may not.
I've noticed with my AV that the first few weeks were the toughest and then [weeks 5 thru 9] I was sort of on cruise control and almost forgot about drinking altogether (which can also be dangerous if we let our guard down too much!).
The past 1-2 weeks my AV has woken up and really tried to derail me. The difference was that the first few weeks it was a physical need to drink (like withdrawals), but now it is mostly psychological, which I am able to talk myself out of with a clear sober mind and no physical need to drink. Also of course getting suppirt here on SR is priceless.
Another tool I have been using to stay on the right path and not get derailed is when my AV strikes I ask myself: Am I hungry? Most of the time YES! I mistake hunger for craving. I eat a nice healthy meal and the cravings melt away. If that does not fully work, then I know I am tired and need to get some rest and check in on SR and/or a Face-to-face meeting (I do LifeRing meetings once a week or so).
Not sure exactly where I was going with this post but as always it feels very healing to just share stuff with you all as I know you all understand.
Must get back to work now. Really appreciate you all listening.
Love and hugs from Northern California,
Chris
I'm sneaking up on four months, and I do find the AV gets more subtle. Instead of yelling "DRINK" at you, it gently suggests that you're good now, you've proven you're not a drunk, so why deny yourself things that make life better, like beer?
Except, then I think hard about it, and ask my AV, hey, I did like beer. But did I like the beer, or did I like how i felt getting drunk on the beer? And if I had a beer now, would I feel satisfied, or would I immediately mack for another 1, 3, 5, or 11? It's a bit unfair, as I know the answer to this, and my AV does not.
So the AV is trying to get me to mentally relapse so that in the right situation, I may actually relapse. Ha ha you sneaky bastard, I'm already on to you, and it won't work. I know that I liked beer, sure. But I LOVED getting mellow/buzzed/hammered on beer WAYYYYY more.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Aliso Viejo, CA
Posts: 863
Good morning undies,
Beautiful day on the west coast. Elvis and I have already been out walking and now he's decided to go back to bed under the covers. Too cold for him! (He's a bit of a temperature wimp and he's lucky he lives in CA)
Welcome back LS. Learn what you can from the experience and move forward. Keep posting.
CaliChris, congrats on 80 days!!! Good to have you here!
Petals, I agree with the others. The past belongs in the past. Try to stay in the present moment. It's all we have. No use in beating yourself up over it. It's already gone. Every time you stress about it or let it bring you down, it takes away from the moment you're in.
No plans for today, so I should probably get the bike out and hit the road. Or my other option is laundry. Ick!
I had a dream last night that I decided to drink after my one year mark. In the dream I was rationalizing why it was ok after a year. I was telling myself it would be a good stopping point. Wow, what a nightmare. I won't put too much thought into the dream except to note that I need to stay on guard with the AV. I have had some drifting thoughts here and there while awake where I imagine myself stopping off after work for a drink. They usually last a few seconds before I reel my head back to reality and tell myself it's not a daydream but the AV trying to hang on in a losing battle. I can tell you guys about the thoughts, but I don't dare tell hubby. I think he would freak out. He's been very supportive lately and very proud of my sobriety. He has continued to be sober from the first time I attempted it for myself, back in January 2013, in support of my sobriety. I'm very grateful to him and it would have been a much more difficult struggle without him.
Have a great day undies! Hi to everybody reading!
Beautiful day on the west coast. Elvis and I have already been out walking and now he's decided to go back to bed under the covers. Too cold for him! (He's a bit of a temperature wimp and he's lucky he lives in CA)
Welcome back LS. Learn what you can from the experience and move forward. Keep posting.
CaliChris, congrats on 80 days!!! Good to have you here!
Petals, I agree with the others. The past belongs in the past. Try to stay in the present moment. It's all we have. No use in beating yourself up over it. It's already gone. Every time you stress about it or let it bring you down, it takes away from the moment you're in.
No plans for today, so I should probably get the bike out and hit the road. Or my other option is laundry. Ick!
I had a dream last night that I decided to drink after my one year mark. In the dream I was rationalizing why it was ok after a year. I was telling myself it would be a good stopping point. Wow, what a nightmare. I won't put too much thought into the dream except to note that I need to stay on guard with the AV. I have had some drifting thoughts here and there while awake where I imagine myself stopping off after work for a drink. They usually last a few seconds before I reel my head back to reality and tell myself it's not a daydream but the AV trying to hang on in a losing battle. I can tell you guys about the thoughts, but I don't dare tell hubby. I think he would freak out. He's been very supportive lately and very proud of my sobriety. He has continued to be sober from the first time I attempted it for myself, back in January 2013, in support of my sobriety. I'm very grateful to him and it would have been a much more difficult struggle without him.
Have a great day undies! Hi to everybody reading!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: England
Posts: 808
Thanks guys it means a lot to me to have your support
I think the main problem continues to be isolation, I have to learn extend my social network. It was a huge blow when I couldn't attend my local AA meetings because of a shift pattern change. I'll have to find a way to get to the AA meetings in the neighbouring village, that's a good idea actually I'll start writing down new ideas, it will help me to have a list
Open to suggestions!
I think the main problem continues to be isolation, I have to learn extend my social network. It was a huge blow when I couldn't attend my local AA meetings because of a shift pattern change. I'll have to find a way to get to the AA meetings in the neighbouring village, that's a good idea actually I'll start writing down new ideas, it will help me to have a list
Open to suggestions!
Working-cl*** pseudo tough
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Posts: 485
Originally Posted by DrakeCKC
Congrats on 80 Chris! 
I set short term goals and that is how I made it. They got longer as I went on.
Sorry again for all the drama, especially toSparky, who I kind of unloaded on.
I set short term goals and that is how I made it. They got longer as I went on.
Sorry again for all the drama, especially toSparky, who I kind of unloaded on.
We're all in this together.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 1,491
Anyone else experience PAWS (Post-Acute Withdrawal Symptoms) ?
Post-Acute Withdrawal Symptoms - Relapse Prevention Strategies
I feel exactly like this right now!
Good to know this is "normal" !
Most importantly..... I won't let it be a trigger!!
Post-Acute Withdrawal Symptoms - Relapse Prevention Strategies
I feel exactly like this right now!
Good to know this is "normal" !
Most importantly..... I won't let it be a trigger!!
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,168
LS good to see you back too many people slip and then feel too embarrassed to come back, which is a little silly as loads of us have had a gazillion attempts at stopping, moderating etc only to come back here to a big hug and a helping hand. Isolation sis a toughy, I too still isolate rather too much., but at least it is from a position of strength in my sobriety. Yes write down ideas as to how you be an get out and about more, and also look at ways to make more friends. Perhaps take up a hobby and attend classes in it.
Petal, if your own child came to you asking forgiveness you would hug them to your heart and tell them they have nothing to forgive. Treat yourself the same. Forgiveness comes from love. Allow yourself to begin to love the person you are becoming, this sweet person is working hard at her sobriety, and is offering support to others as they share the journey. Be kind to her, she is vulnerable and needs lots of hugs, all of which she deserves.
Siesta, I had my absolute worst AV attack around the time of my first anniversary, fortunately I was warned by others who had recently celebrated and had the same thing. It's like AV is having one last push with everything it's got in its tool box to try and tempt you back. It won't, it can't, but the daft little bugger will try. No, sweetie, I will be there waiting to welcome you into the Overs as you throw your mortarboard in the air.
Siesta, how much extra work do our poor emotions have to put up from us? If only we held off worrying unless it was needed, didn't over think everything, didn't think of all te things that can go wrong, push ourselves to manage something instead of asking for a little help.
Give your stress a holiday, take a little time out to just enjoy the wonderful news you have just received.
Hi Glee
Hey Gilmer, how's life?
Tanya, how lovely to see you here, I am so glad a you popped in. I am sorry you are having such a terrible time with both health and family. Money brings out the worst in relatives, I have lost all love and trust in my brother after he misbehaved badly over money. I was also on the receiving end of a two way whispering campaign, but eventually the truth came out. I can only hope that your family realise that life is short and do what is necessary to repair the relationships.
Carlos, you are sounding well, I love the meet with the ex, sounds like it was a lovely day.
Drake, I hope you enjoy your night at the game, some of my best matches have been via the small screen in a pub, though being at a game does take some beating!
CaliChris, welcome back sweetie, good to see you again, you would go a long way to find a better sober twin that Sass to share the journey.
My Undie friends, we are none of us perfect, we are human with all our failings and frailties, but we are all worthy of love, each and every one of us. So go to your mirror, say hi, smile, and tell yourself. ' I am worthy, and I am loved'
Petal, if your own child came to you asking forgiveness you would hug them to your heart and tell them they have nothing to forgive. Treat yourself the same. Forgiveness comes from love. Allow yourself to begin to love the person you are becoming, this sweet person is working hard at her sobriety, and is offering support to others as they share the journey. Be kind to her, she is vulnerable and needs lots of hugs, all of which she deserves.
Siesta, I had my absolute worst AV attack around the time of my first anniversary, fortunately I was warned by others who had recently celebrated and had the same thing. It's like AV is having one last push with everything it's got in its tool box to try and tempt you back. It won't, it can't, but the daft little bugger will try. No, sweetie, I will be there waiting to welcome you into the Overs as you throw your mortarboard in the air.
Siesta, how much extra work do our poor emotions have to put up from us? If only we held off worrying unless it was needed, didn't over think everything, didn't think of all te things that can go wrong, push ourselves to manage something instead of asking for a little help.
Give your stress a holiday, take a little time out to just enjoy the wonderful news you have just received.
Hi Glee
Hey Gilmer, how's life?
Tanya, how lovely to see you here, I am so glad a you popped in. I am sorry you are having such a terrible time with both health and family. Money brings out the worst in relatives, I have lost all love and trust in my brother after he misbehaved badly over money. I was also on the receiving end of a two way whispering campaign, but eventually the truth came out. I can only hope that your family realise that life is short and do what is necessary to repair the relationships.
Carlos, you are sounding well, I love the meet with the ex, sounds like it was a lovely day.
Drake, I hope you enjoy your night at the game, some of my best matches have been via the small screen in a pub, though being at a game does take some beating!
CaliChris, welcome back sweetie, good to see you again, you would go a long way to find a better sober twin that Sass to share the journey.
My Undie friends, we are none of us perfect, we are human with all our failings and frailties, but we are all worthy of love, each and every one of us. So go to your mirror, say hi, smile, and tell yourself. ' I am worthy, and I am loved'
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 1,491
Originally Posted by Gilmer
Yes, I think I experienced some PAWS about five months in. It passed in a couple of months.
I was cruising for about 4-5 weeks with no cravings or irritability or any AV etc. All of a sudden BAMMM! AV woke up from hibernation and is trying to derail me! Not going to give in ! NO WAY !! I've come too far !! Drinking is NOT an option for me! Thanks for listening everyone !
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