Dee74

Thanks Rocks

izzy8

Rocks- yeah, people describe me as sweet(if I hear that again, I'll gag), and laid back- both of which I don't see myself as at all ...

When I was in grad school, I "discovered" things that could be hobbies I guess ...started writing music and art(was pencil sketching some of my patients. One guy in a half way house walked up to a drawing and said, "That's me!").

Later in life, when I was doing the normal- daily grind of my "present work", I discovered another interest as well.

It's still hard for me to do things, "just for fun". My husband totally doesn't understand. He's the King of Recreation . He's always like, [Izzy], you need to REST more ...!

???

I guess some of us are more driven than others.

One question Ive found helpful in this regard has been, "What did you enjoy doing as a child?" ... Might be food for thought?

freein14

Morning everyone,

Rocks, that's exactly how I used to feel when my work colleagues would chat about all of their hobbies (exercise classes, horse riding, dogs, sewing, swimming, tennis, hockey etc). I felt a bit lacking in the interests department. I also remember, when I was drinking, and in the first few weeks/months of sobriety, I found it difficult to really enjoy anything. I'd lost my sense of enjoyment, or rather alcohol had stolen my sense of enjoyment.

I'm pleased to say that it does return! I'm enjoying so much more, even social things that I used to avoid I'm now actually looking forward to. My life is so much fuller and more balanced. It will be for you too, soon, but it does take a bit of time. My advice is to risk trying new things, maybe one new thing a week? And see where it leads. It's fun to explore new hobbies.

Having said that, I think a lot of us, when we're studying have a tendency to put all our efforts in to that one goal, so don't be too hard on yourself.

The veg garden is a bit bare at the moment, but we generally have a good crop of runner beans, broad beans, peas, tomatoes, garlic, salads, and fruit. However, with my new sober energy, I'm confident that next season will be more bountiful than ever before (I need to let the slugs know, so they don't sabotage!)

I've been taking a "supergreens" drink every day for the past month, but I don't think it's really made much difference. Today I've started drinking spirulina mixed with Apple juice. My stomach is making the most tremendous gurgling noises. I don't think it's ever been this vocal, I'm expecting some trouble ahead

Have a lovely sober Sunday all.

izzy8

Love this topic- as I'm sure many of us are trying to find healthier ways to unwind. I thought about asking everyone last week, "how exactly do you unwind, soberly".

Freein - you have some great thoughts.

My point w grad school was that AS I was fully engaging my mind in my work, areas of interest that could have turned into a hobby kind of happened serendipitously(and there's my 5 cent word for the day ).

I still have the hardest time not making everything into a project/job, tho...

So how does everyone (healthfully) "unwind"...?

freein14

Hi Izzy,

I've just been outside stargazing, I find watching the stars just so mind blowing, it clears my head of any worries. Most of my relaxation activities are rather inactive unfortunately: reading, yoga, walking. I've started playing the piano again, but that has its own challenges. I'd like to do more furniture restoring, I found my dresser project really absorbing. Skipping outside makes me feel good, but I have to motivate myself to do it, so I'm not sure if it can be classed as unwinding.

I'm also toying with the idea of needlework (patchwork/embroidery), I love hand sewing.

10 months ago I would be doing none of these things, wow, how things can change with just one good decision.

How's everyone else relaxing these days?

(Btw, since drinking that spirulina, I've produced enough gas to get a space shuttle off the ground, I think I'll skip it on work mornings!)

Hope everyone's having a great weekend.

rockstonic

Glad to know that it eases up! I'm just so impatient!

As a child I spent most of my time reading and drawing and drawing and reading. I spent last night and this morning listening to a podcast and drawing and it was a nice return to form. So good suggestion! The spinning doesn't quite go away.

I agree with you freein about the trouble enjoying things. I feel constantly like I'm supposed to be doing this or that even when I really don't have to be doing anything. And I also agree with studying being the one goal and being kind of all consuming. I think part of me is trying to overcompensate for wasted time and take on a bunch of things to prove my worth. Also, I love home grown tomatoes. Hope your garden flourishes!

I like this topic too izzy. I'm taking notes. I will say that something new I've found in sobriety is rollerblading. I find it hard to drag myself out of the house to walk the dog and exercise but since I got my rollerblades I've been out blading every single day cause it's so much fun. It hardly feels like work. I think I unwind best when it combines fun and moving. But yeah, rollerblades are a blast!

freein14

Rocks, rollerblading looks great fun. When I visited London earlier on this year, I loved to watch the rollerbladers in Hyde park. Enjoy!

ST, talking of the more extreme sports, how are you doing on that skateboard of yours? Hope all's well, check in if you can soon.

I have to take my OH in to work this morning because his cars off the road for a couple of days. So it'll be a bit of an early start.

Later, I'll be seeing the solicitor with my parents to hopefully sort out the power of attorney for my Mum. Third time lucky! Then we won't need to worry about that anymore.

Hope everyone's start to the week goes to plan today.

rockstonic

freein, best of luck at the solicitor's. I hope that the third time is in fact the charm! It would be nice to have that cleared up. My boyfriend's car broke down a few months back so I've been driving him to work, which makes my mornings quite early. One thing I definitely appreciate about him being gone this week is that I don't have to work about waking up to take him in! Although spending that time in the morning together can be nice

I'm heading to bed now myself. Hope everyone starts their week off on a great foot!

freein14

Thanks Rocks, yes, we managed to sort out the first stage of the power of attorney, thank goodness. The solicitor was very nice, and efficient. I'm glad to be home though, it's felt like a long day.

It's another beautiful starry night outside, looking at the universe puts our daily thoughts and preoccupations in to perspective.

Hope everyone's had a good day.

obosob

Morning all,
Tuesday 7.56am.

Trying to practice patience and deliberation, both of which are new to me.
Not easy.
All this stress at work has fired the old AV back up again.
Which I'm sick of......
Interesting to watch yourself though, the mind games are insane really!

I also found myself cruising the liquor aisle at the supermarket here during a lunchtime.
Thinking of drinking made my sides turn a little, I was amazed by the advertising on all the bottles. Very clever...... There's a beer called blue girl, with the advertisment showing healthy blonde twenty somethings prancing about on the top of a mountain in the snow.
All the issues a chronic drinker faces are easily put to the side when you're about to join the gang in some swiss snow party, with all your friends......
mmm...
I'm at 7 months now, the 24th November.....
I'm reading posts here all the time of people who have thought they had this licked only to return and admit it didn't work.

Christmas is the trigger for thees feeling too.
I have my family all coming over to HK and a couple of good friends...
All of which love a drink, except my mother and aunt, who have watched what it does to all of us.
Need to be clear with them all before they get here.

Knee surgery on Thursday may well be the excuse I need to avoid the scrutiny and questions. I'll just say I'm in rehab......for the knee that is!

Hope all the fools are well....

stay tuned..................

izzy8

Rocks- I hear you on the spinning ... Wish we could share a cup of coffee and talk about it- I know that would stop my wheels for a little while, anyway!

Free- you sound like you're doing so well. Where we live, I can see the "city lights" in the distance. I thought of your stars when I looked out my window.

Obo- lol! Yep, if it were only as good as the ads make it seem ...

Happy Thanksgiving, yall. We're hosting this year. And I really should be "thankful". Just not feelin it! My family that I see once a yr insisted on coming here for thxgvg. So I have lots of cleaning and cooking to do ...

I'm thankful for the fools!

Hope you all have a great turkey day(or just a great day ... )

❤️

freein14

Hi all,

I've just lost my post!
So this will be a condensed version.

Izzy, is thanksgiving, on Thursday? I hope you are able to enjoy it despite all of the prep you have to do.

Obo, have you listened to any of Eckhart Tolles talks (there's lots on utube) it can be really helpful to see a way of living contentedly through difficult times. I've found his work really helpful.

I need to go and scrape the ice off the car windscreen. Winter has hit us. Brrrrrrrr.

Have a great day everyone.

Dee74

Let's keep the Fools Bargain going right into the New Year guys

D

MariahGayle

Hi Fools.....back in for the fools bargain. I drank after my 90 days.....3 times....the last was on Sunday. I have 1 day. I know that there is absolutely nothing in the drinking for me & that I want sobriety more than anything. Have been thinking of you all!

Thanksgiving is at my house....trying to keep it simple. Have a game of flag football planned pre-dinner, at the park, down from my house, for the little ones...really looking forward to that....It will get the young Dad's & Mom's together too.

izzy8

Mariah- glad you checked in. I know you're discouraged but you've got a lot of sobriety to be proud of! I like your flag football idea ...

Free- yep, it's thursday. Now that I have the massive grocery trip behind me, I'm actual enjoy the cooking part... It's more the family dynamics I dread. My kids dread it even more than I do... They usually end up in tears. So, I guess its good that it's only once/year!

I'm in for the bargain... I'll need to remind myself of that over the next few days ... !

Take care, fools

freein14

Hi all,

Mariah, I'm so pleased you're back on track. Just look forward, to a happy healthy start to 2015. We can do this.

Izzy, it's such a shame that these family gatherings can be so stressful. I hope the kiddos end up enjoying it, it can be a long day if the children aren't happy. Having said that isn't there a saying like "if momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy"? So perhaps you need to make sure you're as fresh and peaceful as possible. I have no idea what to advise to help, other than "good luck" I'll be thinking of you!

Perhaps after your experience you can give me some tips for Christmas. Think of yourself as a trailblazer.

Seriously I hope it goes really well for you and the kiddies. Hope your thanksgiving goes well too Mariah, and all of our other US comrades.

Thanks Dee, yes we need to keep the Fools Bargain going and greet the new year strong.

Hope everyone's day has gone well.

freein14

Just to remind us all of the Fools Bargain:

If we feel under attack from the AV/gremlin we will:

1. Post on SR to request reinforcements as soon as possible.

2. Drink some water, juice, tea something healthy.

3. Eat a snack.

4. Take time for a gorgeous snooze.

5. Take some form of exercise, preferably involving some fresh air.

There we have it, our strategy for a successful end to 2014 and a great start to 2015.

izzy8

Thx for the reminder, freein- I'm taking a little breather... Probably won't have much time for posting after tonite.

Yeah, I wish it was that easy- that my attitude could change the course of things. Unfortunately, the last time we were together, even though I was having a great time with my family(I always enjoy certain family members ), my kids weren't having nearly as much fun. My stepmother literally is like 2 people. To most, like those she's trying to impress, she's an angel. But behind closed doors, shes a very mean person. That's why my kids dread it .

But I agree- holidays definitely shouldn't be hard on kids! So, I'm trying to get all the "work" done ahead of time so that by the time they all get here, I can enjoy the holiday too(with my children). Experience has taught me all kinds of fun things. .

Now on to pies!

Upward2Enlightenment

Hi everyone.

Just a quick note to say hello.
On day 6 being cigarette free. Hope you all are doing well.
Mariah, it's all about moving forward. You are back on course.

Everyone here in the US have a happy and sober thanksgiving.

Like D said, let's keep the bargain going through the new year.

Dee74

Welcome back Mariah. Are you going to do anything differently now?

D