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Class of July 2012 Part 4

Old 09-02-2012, 02:33 PM
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Obladi - AA isn't a good fit with me either. But I find rational recovery really helpful. And thanks for the support

JHE, Obladi - some "friends" can't deal with this stuff. It is a really hard subject for many to wrap their heads around. That's why groups like this are so helpful. Sometimes the anonymity makes it easier to share and self-disclose, as there is no fear of judgement.
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Old 09-02-2012, 07:43 PM
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Good going everyone!

Bday party for my birth dad went ok. Only stayed a couple hours. I just feel 'out of it' today. There was alcohol there. Thought crossed my mind to have a beer, but the thought didn't linger - it kept going all the way out of my mind. Did end up leaving my keys there - h drove. Thankfully, my half-sister didn't leave yet and she brought them back with her. I can get them tomorrow.

Have a great night/day everyone. For me, it's goodnight!
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Old 09-02-2012, 08:57 PM
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R4R that's kind of funny about the keys when you think about it. You left your keys sober, most people do that because of drinking lol

It seems a lot of us here are not going the AA route, but are finding other programs to help. Whatever it takes!! I want to read Rational Recovery one of these days. I didn't get very far into AVRT yet, but I like the taming of the AV idea and it's helped me a lot!

TIG glad the energy drink/advil combo helped. I forgot about energy drinks, I could probably use a couple of those these days.

Obladi, bummer about the laptop. Spybot Search and Destroy free program is good about picking up trojans and getting rid of them! No drinks-good job!
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Old 09-03-2012, 04:17 AM
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Originally Posted by NoFireWater View Post
Obladi, you may have just hit on a really good reason to stay motivated. I'm finding that what's authentically me is not a drunk that is frequently embarrassed by my drinking. The real me is much more content to read, watch movies, walk on the beach, and stay a lot more mellow than I've been while drinking. Being drunk and making bad decisions just doesn't fit with the majority of my person, and I bet that's true for every one of us here. The desire to change back into someone you remember and like is a pretty powerful tool for stopping. btw sorry about your friend-maybe they will turn back to you in the future!

It's good to keep telling yourself when you're feeling good "I feel good right now BECAUSE I didn't drink" instead of "I feel great, let's drink".

TIG very nice post!

Smitty, you're right, there never is a good time to quit. There are many many good times to postpone quitting though, as we all know! Just start at some random time and keep going.

Thanks for the bday wishes!
This is me too,thanks for the insight. I had a bad night last night.I like to be alone. We had people round,it makes me nervous,they were all drinking and I was,dare I say it,bored. Made me realize I often drank because of boredom, not to be sociable but to numb the boredom. I love just being alone,reading and being mellow too.

Also love the 'I feel great so I won't drink'
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Old 09-03-2012, 06:22 AM
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jhe, it's ok you had a bad night as long as you didn't pick up. I imagine the other folks here have many many tales of being uncomfortable/out of sorts when they stopped drinking. We have to pay our dues, eh?

Thanks to you and Dee and R4R and the others who made a point for calling me out. I do believe that avrt has a point when saying time doesn't matter once you make the decision to stop, but I'm not sure if I entirely agree with that. Depends on the audience, I suppose. Because you are all so close to this journey, I do want to let you know that your collective support helped me to make it to the 30 hour mark thus far. It's a start. Or perhaps I should say, it is the beginning.
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Old 09-03-2012, 06:25 AM
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JHE: Sorry you had a bad night. Having friends around drinking would make me anxious too. Hopefully you will get a chance to relax and read some this morning to re-balance things.

NFW: I haven't gone to any meetings yet. So far, just SR. The Allen Carr book sounds interesting, so I want to get it.

R4R: Sounds like it was good that you went to the party even though you didn't feel 100%. Hope you get your keys back.

Mel: How's it going? Any good hikes planned? There's a trail at the Grand Canyon that is rim to rim. I read about it in a running magazine, but it sounds like a great hike too. Do you have any big goal hiking plans?

Katan: Adding lemon or lime to water sounds good. A friend of mine drank a ton of Pepsi and was bloated all the time. He quit the Pepsi and his stomach flattened out. Love the dog picture avatar.

Obladi: Let us know what you think of the rational recovery book.

Smitty!!!! Love to see your posts. Glad you got a technique for pushing off the cravings.

Sentso: Hope all is well. Looking forward to your return when you can. Stay strong!

Live long and prosper my friends (been watching the Big Bang Theory on TV).
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Old 09-03-2012, 06:26 AM
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Missing Emma and Sentso... among others (Sarah? Marjoram?).
Hope our more quiet classmates check in soon.
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Old 09-03-2012, 06:34 AM
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Good Morning Everyone...

I like aspects of AA and aspects of RR & AVRT, and then I also have a strong spiritual faith (that at times, doesn't feel very strong - but then again, I am human...). So, I blend them into my own sort of program that works.
Everyone has to find their own path to recovery and it will be different for everyone - but the underlying theme is that we are all traveling in the same direction towards living a sober life. When all is said and done, we all want the same thing to actually LIVE our lives and not use drugs or alcohol to simply cope with life.

Ok, I'll step down from my soapbox

I know I have to make cookie today... maybe some zucchini stew - parents coming over (my adopted family) for a cookout later.... but I do need to go to my sister's house for because it's her birthday (adopted family). She will definitely have alcohol there. I don't need it. My wants say something else... but I don't have to listen - in fact, I can tell it NO!

JHE... you're not prying... there was drinking there, but I don't really want to associate much with my birth family (not really with my adopted family either - both are equally disfunctional). I met him when I was 28. Sort of a long, short story... my birth mother I grew up thinking was my aunt (they were sisters). So, technically, my aunt and uncle raised me and my sister is actually my cousin.

Have a wonderfully sober day, my Julian friends!
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Old 09-03-2012, 06:39 AM
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You're welcome, Ob... we're here for each other. Helping each other helps us stay sober another day also

Yeah, where did Sentso go?

"Live long and proper" - nice TiG!
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Old 09-03-2012, 11:26 AM
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Hello everyone.

Sorry I've been very silent lately. I'm at 7 weeks and feel good, although it's still often hard to stay sober. You all know how it is. Wine and beer here and there. Saying no.

I'm coming back from a Yoga retreat, and I wanted to let you all know that it was fantastic. More than that even... Life changing I guess. I hope I don't forget what I've learned these past days.
I've come to realize that my drinking was part of a whole life I don't want to live anymore. I love being a musician but it's impossible to seek for a spiritual life when you're always on the road. And being on the road is not living enough, it's more of a way to escape. I don't want to escape anylonger. We examined the symbols behind every yoga pose, so we could make them relate to our lives, and we kept writing down what we thought and felt. I had not been writing that much in years. Writing from the heart (sometimes automatic writing) really tells you a lot about yourself. Also we examined our dreams and how we can dialogue with them (analyse their meaning and then taking action in real life to honor their message) and I felt a reconnection to myself I had forgotten could exist.
I am shocked by all this, in a very positive way.

Sorry for the long message about this! If you are interested I could give references by private message! I gotta go now already, sorry! I'll have more time soon I think!

I thought and think about you a lot, and I send you lots of good thoughts and strenght. Keep it up, you can do this, we can do this! We're a community, and I've never loved this word more than these days!

I'll be back soon! Good night, good day, believe in yourself!
xx

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Old 09-03-2012, 01:24 PM
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Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
Missing Emma and Sentso... among others (Sarah? Marjoram?).
Hope our more quiet classmates check in soon.
I wrote one of these people (who is also a "friend" here on SR) on their profile yesterday. I do hope that we'll hear from everyone. I've fallen out of regular contact with a good SR friend who joined the site on the same day that I did. I miss them. :\
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Old 09-03-2012, 04:51 PM
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Hey Blue, hope you're doing well.
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Old 09-03-2012, 05:14 PM
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Hey guys, sorry I haven't been very active. I'm in my last few weeks of school and just trying to get through that at the moment. Not too bad right now as well.
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Old 09-03-2012, 05:16 PM
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keep it going Emma - good luck with the coursework

D
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Old 09-03-2012, 07:28 PM
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Yay, Sentso and Emma!
Thanks for checking in.
Sounds good on both fronts.
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Old 09-03-2012, 08:24 PM
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good to hear from you too Sentso - congratulations on 7 weeks

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Old 09-03-2012, 08:34 PM
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Sentso, that sounds like an awesome experience! So glad you got to do that. All that writing may inspire lyrics down the road too, I would imagine. Glad you checked in!!

I made it through the Labor Day party. It was exceptionally boring this year, which made me happy, less temptation. Home early and sober. SR had a lot to do with that, so thank you all!! Normally, at a really boring party I would have been drinking more to make it interesting, I would have been the one playing the jukebox to get everyone going,etc. and I would have been the one
with a headache the next morning.

I like how everyone is encouraging check ins from our group. We have a really nice support network going here, and it's great to know we're still going strong!
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Old 09-03-2012, 10:23 PM
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Who knew that a boring party could be a good thing, NFW!

Thanks, TiG, I am doing well. The last couple of weeks have seen me on here at little less. Part of that is work picking up, and part is due to a recent family visit. Things have been good though. I'm getting a fair amount of exercise lately, which has really been great.

Emma, I'm glad you're doing okay.

To everyone else, although I'm not terribly active on the thread I do read your posts almost daily. I enjoy keeping up with your successes and challenges and I hope you'll keep sharing them!
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Old 09-04-2012, 03:03 AM
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Hello classmates

Thanks for not thinking I was prying R4R. It is hard with families isn't it.

Blueshades- sorry to hear you've lost contact with your friend-mine was an SR friend too. As Obladi says though,everyone has their own issues.

Katan,you are right,it's hard for people who don't understand too.

Obladi- goodon you getting to 30hours,hope you are still there, increasing those hours.

Good on you NFW and all our friends across the pond not drinking on labor day weekend

TIG-how are you today? I didn't get much chance to relax yesterday. DS is at preschool this morning-feel at a loose end. I'm glad I made the decision to go back to work PT. I think my life would have lacked focus and direction otherwise,once he is settled in.

sentso-good to hear from you andgreatnews that you enjoyed the yoga retreat. congrats on 7 weeks

hope everyone is feeling good
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Old 09-04-2012, 03:46 AM
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Good Morning Friends....

Congrats to all for making it through the holiday weekend... or just the weekend!

Ob... nice counting on the hours... as long as you're sober, that's the main thing.

Nice to hear from you Blue, Sentso, Emma

Parents came over yesterday... had a cookout... no alcohol involved. Usually I'm smashed by the time they get here for a dinner. Major trigger. But I was fine. Went to my sister's and she was drinking earlier in the day. Didn't even want a beer. Actually felt sorry for her.

Big counseling session tonight. My therapist wants the couple from church who have been praying and talking with me to join us. I made a comment about it being three against one and he said that he just wants us all to work together. And he wants it to be an hour and a half.... I think it's going to be a tough one. I don't have a lot of respect for myself right now. It's complicated. But not impossible to get through...

Anyway, have a terrific Tuesday everyone
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