Members with less than 2 weeks -Part 9

[Anna]

The last part:

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-8-a-18.html (For Members with Less than 2 Weeks Part 8)

[CarolD]

Thank you Anna.....

How about a check in to begin our fresh start?

I so appreciate y'all who are joinging in on our
Daily Support thread......

It took me many tries to find my recovery from alcoholism
and so this is a special place for me...
it helps me keep in balance.

Yes.....we can and do recover
there is no wrong way to find your path.

Forward we go side by side.........

[ANGELINA243]

Hi everyone! Just got back from a meeting. I have been having general anxiety today from mid-afternoon to now. It isn't overwhelming, but I have had feelings of fear and for some reason cannot seem to remember even the simplest things.....things I know, but just "blank out" temporarily for some reason and it's like I can't remember what I did minutes ago, almost like a blackout......like my body is functioning as it should but my mind is off somewhere else--if that makes any sense.

Anyway--finishing up day 8 here. Hope I will feel more "normal" tomorrow.....well, as normal as I can be--anyway. I also have some fears concerning work---the workload will be increasing (which is good for business) but it will mean I will have less time for recovery. I still am looking for a sponsor--I did talk to a girl today...she gave me a few names of people she would recommend. Anyway--hope everyone else is doing well.

[christin1225]

Day six and still counting, still not sleeping either (though I'm going to give it another shot in a few minutes). I stayed up a little later than usual (midnight), hoping to sleep. I slept for almost an hour and then laid in bed for what seemed like another two hours (during which time only fifteen minutes had passed). That was about 2.5 hours ago. I'm so tired that I'm walking around dizzy during the day. And now I'm whining. Sorry.

This evening, my husband and I were walking and he told me that he's proud of me because I haven't used. Of course, this past week hasn't been like it was the past couple of months. It's easier on the Sub. I would probably be in relapse again (especially considering the sleep situation) if not for the Sub. My counselor asked me if I feel like I'm cheating (being on the Suboxone) when I'm sitting in the rooms. Of course I do! After all, I know how impossible it was for me to resist relieving the obsession just a couple of weeks ago but, now, voila! I'm not using.

I know that it would help if I could find a way to start accepting this as a worthy means of getting clean instead of being ashamed that I haven't been able to get past the obsession without chemical assistance.

[CarolD]

Not been a great day for me either ...*sigh*

I've been dealing with some serious breathing problems
saw a specialist today who will do a procedure
tomorrow afternoon for answers. I won't know anything
until next Thursday ..please keep me in your thoughts
and or prayers for a good result from the test.

Thanks....

[christin1225]

Originally Posted by CarolD

Not been a great day for me either ...*sigh* I've been dealing with some serious breathing problems

((Carol)) I've got some prayers going up on your behalf.

Today is Day 7 for me. I finally slept last night. It was wonderful! After I'm done praying for Carol, I'm going to pray that I sleep as well tonight.

I hope that everyone on this thread has had a clean and sober Thursday!

[ANGELINA243]

Day 12 and moving forward.....

[bohemianzen]

i don't know what day it is for me and i'm not going to count for awhile. i would have to walk to get anything since i'm out of transportation right now due to the dui. i would be too embarassed to pick up a beer anyway so i don't know whether these days count or not. this whole dui experience has disheartened my soul. so i'm back here under 2wks again - i'm glad to be here in truth, but i just don't feel anything too much right now.
congrats to everyone else tho

[bohemianzen]

forgot to add......
carol you definitely are in my prayers, i hope you can get some relief soon~take care

[ViciousCycle]

DUI's are very disheartening.....try to get the lesson in it and move past. It's hard not to beat yourself up. I am good at that. Hang in there.

I am on day one........again.

[ANGELINA243]

13 days today......Have a bday lunch get together planned with family....looks like today will be a good day.

[ChameleonBoy]

Seems to be what I'm good at these days. Anyone wan't to but a shovel?

[ANGELINA243]

Hey CB--what does that mean exactly......? I am doing well--btw>well, as good as I can be--I guess>which definitely beats the alternative....you know--jails, institutions, death etc.

Good to see you posting again on the forums.

[ANGELINA243]

14 days today....

[CarolD]

ANGELINA243.......Congratulations!!

[CarolD]

Hi Everyone.....

Thanks for keeping me in your prayers and kind thoughts
I do appreciate y'all.....

Medical test all came back with no major new issues.

It's a grand day to be sober!

[Lastthird]

Right there with you! Day 12 and looking forward to another victory! We can do this!

[CarolD]

Lastthird....

Good for you! Well done on your sober time

[pemulis]

Hi everyone

I posted here a few times before - hopefully I'll actually stick around this time. Day 1 for me and it has been .... interesting. I got into work today and my boss called me into her office and reprimanded me for not being on top of my work and gave me a written warning. She had done this once before and I was scared about losing my job. She knew something was up with me, and I broke down and confessed about my drinking, on the verge of tears and everything. Her son is a heroin addict who's been clean for a year, so she was very understanding. She told me I should go to my parents house this weekend and tell them about it. So I composed myself (took a while), made some calls and got an appointment to a substance abuse place on Monday. Called my mom told her I had to come home and talk to her.

So I hopped the train to my parent's house and told my mom what I told my boss (very difficult conversation) she took it better than I thought she would. It's a lot easier to not drink here then it is sitting in my apartment, but I'm still craving a drink. Starting to get anxious and a little depressed as well. Think I'll make some popcorn and throw on the Big Lebowski.

[CarolD]

Many of us had false starts on our way to solid recovery.
Good to know you are trying again....

I'm also glad you are not going to be alone as you de tox.
Withdrawing from alcohol is very uncomfortable to most
and dangerous to some drinkers.

Please check out this link for facts and some of our experiences

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html (Quitting..What to expect ..What we did)


Do let us know how you are doing
Welcome back to our recovery community....

[ChameleonBoy]

Originally Posted by pemulis

Hi everyone

I posted here a few times before - hopefully I'll actually stick around this time. Day 1 for me and it has been .... interesting. I got into work today and my boss called me into her office and reprimanded me for not being on top of my work and gave me a written warning. She had done this once before and I was scared about losing my job. She knew something was up with me, and I broke down and confessed about my drinking, on the verge of tears and everything. Her son is a heroin addict who's been clean for a year, so she was very understanding. She told me I should go to my parents house this weekend and tell them about it. So I composed myself (took a while), made some calls and got an appointment to a substance abuse place on Monday. Called my mom told her I had to come home and talk to her.

So I hopped the train to my parent's house and told my mom what I told my boss (very difficult conversation) she took it better than I thought she would. It's a lot easier to not drink here then it is sitting in my apartment, but I'm still craving a drink. Starting to get anxious and a little depressed as well. Think I'll make some popcorn and throw on the Big Lebowski.

I had situation that sounds a lot like that. I actually stopped drinking for 13 months then. I did pick up again and find myself with a written warned I will be receiving random UA's. Didn't happen so so today I am on day 3 now and as far as I know still have a job.

Thank you for sharing your story. Please keep in touch with is here and I will do the same back to you. Enjoy the movie.

[pemulis]

Day 4, aka: Well that didn't go so well

Days 1-3 went surprisingly well. Some mild physical symptoms (chills, sweating), a little bit of anxiety and cravings, but less than I expected. Then, today came. I went to work and was more productive today than in about every day in the last month combined. I was pretty happy with myself, and was on my way to do an eval at an outpatient rehab place. I walk through the door, and the receptionist seems to not pay attention to me. Then I glance to my right and what do I see?

Under an empty box is an empty case from my favorite brewery. Filling out forms, waiting to be seen and all I can think about is cracking open a hop devil. So I talk with the therapist for about 5 minutes, and basically its in one ear and out the other. I'm sorry, but when my first impression of a place makes me think of drinking all credibility is out the door. My cravings got even worse leaving, being completely disenfranchised about the whole experience. All I could think of is drinkdrinkdrink.

Luckily, when I got home I popped in a pinch of skoal (disgusting? absolutely, but its more relaxing and long lasting than cigarettes - besides, my lungs are in need of a break), and now I'm feeling much more relaxed and the cravings have subsided. Time to go do laundry and grab some ramen from the corner store for dinner (apparently my body wants more than one meal a day when I'm not drinking). I'll probably pop in later to at least read some threads for some additional inspiration, but luckily those intense cravings passed. Thanks for letting me vent.

[CarolD]

CB.....pemulis .....Yes! yoou are making sober progress!

[LG1]

I'm reluctant to say this is Day 1 because I don't know if I can commit to this. I've been here on SR earlier this spring and the most I've made it sober was 5 days. And to do that I had to alienate myself from my family, friends and basically everyone around me. And yet... here I am again.

Everyone else around me is comfortable with their drinking... but I'm not. The little voice in my head always convinces me "it's okay this time" but by the morning I'm hung over and disappointed with myself for drinking. And that following day is a total waste. Then on day 2 or 3 I start the cycle all over again.

My father is one of my best friends and drinking buddies and this is his cycle (minus the guilt), too... he thinks I'm over-reacting and doesn't seriously support my sobriety.

So I'm sorta lost right now. I can only hide in my house so long before people start asking "Where's Alan?"

Thanks for listening. Hope sobriety sticks this time.

~ Alan

[CarolD]

Welcome back to SR and our Daily Support thread Alan

It is difficult to keep sober for everyone and
especially when you are around drinkers.
Sorry to know that is your situation.

Have you had an honest talk with your Dad
about why you want to quit? If not....I
suggest you find a time when he is sober
and explain your reasons.

I lived 900 miles away from my family when my
drinking became a problem for me. When I told
them I was stopping....all I got was "OK good"

I did find much support with my new non drinking
friends I met in AA. They understood how hard
it was and helped me tremendously.

Good to know you are trying again....please keep posting
ask questions....and let us know how you are doing