Members with less than 2 weeks -Part 9

[CarolD]

30........Super!

[thirtybubba]

Did it! Got 2 weeks and 4 hours and 40 minutes.

*evil laugh*

Wow. That was an interesting roller coaster ride. See, that's why I don't like roller coasters. Now if only I could convince myself that I don't like liquor...

Oh well, I got two weeks and I guess I might as well stay this way for a while. Maybe see if I can make it the whole semester.

There's only two problems with this as I see it--aside from my frequent temptation and frustration with my little world--:

1. I have always had, since the 90s, a bad habit of messing up in mid-October. I have no idea why, don't remember anything bad happening then or anything--and my memory of bad things is unfortunately crystal clear when I'm sober. I spent many a year actively trying to kill the brain cell responsible for this. I have since learned this is impossible, but I really did try. Worst of all, in college, mid-October is a time from which I can barely, if at all, recover the semester--since by the time I sober up a little, it's usually late November or mid-December (end of semester).

2. If I say go the semester and at the end of the semester I'm not in a place such as where I am now, ie, feeling really positive about what may or may not come, I may use that as an excuse to automatically go back to the bottle. Unfortunately, I have seen a lot of people around 90days or some other aniversary say similar things, that the thrill of sobriety was gone... To say nothing of yesterday's spate of relapses.

Anyways, thanks Carol and Dee for all the help understanding what's going on with me--I feel like I'm going through puberty or something all over. Ain't planning on leaving, but I guess I gotta graduate from this one.

*puts on little hat with tassle*

Keep going strong, MsWalker, Daisy, AboveItAll, Grrrr--I never thought I'd be here, so anyone's got a good chance at making it.

[CarolD]

Hi 30....

How do I keep the thrill of sbriety alive?
By connecting daily with God and AA.

For me....that means
I strive to be a woman living with joyous purpose.

You are more than welcome to check back with us
on this thread. Your replyshare may help a
member find their way.......

All my best......

[thirtybubba]

Thanks y'all.

I do need a purpose... I know as well as anyone I gotta be here for a reason. Drinking ain't the least of what I've been saved from over the years.

Maybe it's this ph.d. thing... it has been falling together in an unusual (for me) way... people keep popping up to help me with what I need as far away as Texas. Don't know yet, but I'm rolling along that path headlong.

And apparently I am helping people... never would have guessed my good-for-nothing self would be in that position.

Well, it's all new anyways, might as well be confusing.

TB, happy all by herself

[grrrr]

Hi all,
Back again. Had a little difficulty with my 'no muscle' (thanks Dee for that analogy), but nothing too serious. I know from experience that it gets much easier to say no and isn't really that hard, but a few yeses can get in and weaken it all.
I started my day with Yoga today and start a Spanish class this evening. I have many things I want to do with a clear head that are motivating me to make healthy choices.
K

[CarolD]

Yes indeed.....a clear head is so important for me too.
So many things I've found interesting to explore

Also....I found I really enjoy how my mind clicks
I've become cheerful ...laughing is easier.
I amuse myself often...

Always good to see you here

[PrimalScream]

6 days here. Starting to feel better...still not sleeping very well but I'm sure that will come around. Hey Carol, I always find laughing is so much easier when sober as well...I find it is a sure sign you are getting there when you find yourself laughing at things you hardly even noticed when you were in the fog of alcohol or hungover or detoxing. Great to be here!!

[thirtybubba]

And great to have you here...

Sleep might come around, it might not--some have posted on here that a year later it's still elusive, others are good to go after a week. I'm still hit or miss, some nights I get 8 hours, some nights 2 and then 2 and then 1... but I always wake up with a clearer head than I used to.

And laughter, yeah, I hear you there.


-TB, doing just fine after a restless night...

[Dee74]

Hi Again PS

Hi TB and Carol too
Yes, I amuse myself often

D

[CarolD]

Well done on your sober time PS....Welcome!


Please see if this link is useful to you

Insomnia? 42 Simple Tips to Help You Get to Sleep - Insomnia treatment, cures

TB you may not have seen it...soooo....you too.

I've been using on line recovery since '92.
What a great interesting experience!
PS in Canada-Dee in Austrailia .....TB and I sit on
the opposite side of the U.S.

and here we are...sharing info and support with each other


Let's all have another day of progress..

[PrimalScream]

Thanks and Hi guys. Day 7. I went to bed at 8pm last night...took a melatonin. I did sleep for a few hours before waking up and then was in a kind of drugged fog the rest of the night...when the alarm went off at 7am I felt like I could have slept all day. I have never been the best sleeper though. except this one time about 10 or 11 years ago. I quit everything for about 3 months (drinking/drugs/cigs) and started running. I got up to running 10km every other day and lifting weights the other days. I used to sleep 9 hours a night and wake up in the morning and bounce out of bed...it was awesome. That was the only time in my life I ever really slept good. I want to get back to that. Of course you can all guess why I stopped doing it...that's right, for whatever reason I got bored one day and decided to go out and buy a case of beer a gram of weed and a pack of smokes and get rid of them all in record time. What a dumb a**...
Even though I am not sleeping the greatest right now I do feel pretty good, and kind of excited, thinking about the possibility of feeling a little better each day I stay sober.

Oh, and I will check out that thread Carol, Thanks!!

[CarolD]

Thanks for checking back with us PS
Glad to know you are still on track.....

I'm looking f forward to my noon AA meeting
I go early to straighten up the room-start coffee
It's also a good time to onnect with others
After the meeting.....some of us have lunch and fellowship.
AA friends keep my recovery fun....

My cyber friends keep me interested ...sharing with
y'all is a vital part of my life. Thank you.

[Dee74]

I never slept well for years PS...now I sleep like a log
never did like sleep tho all that much so it's usually about 6 hours or so

D

[PrimalScream]

Day 8 and all is good. Didn't sleep that great again last night but feel better today than yesterday. Didn't take a melatonin last night, I find I feel to drugged out the next day after taking one. I think as I get into more exercise I will probably sleep better. I am just really thankful to be able to think clearer and read books and laugh more now...I am actually really looking forward to the weekend, waking up Saturday and Sunday morning not hungover. Thanks for the kind words guys. Have a great day!!

[CarolD]

I'm planning to enjoy another day of sobreity
Wishing y'all the best day possible....

[CarolD]

Hi Everyone.....

It's been a rainy morning in Georgia
the Atlanta Falcons game starts at 1

I'll be glued to my TV with and Ice Tea
Being sober makes the game more interesting
not only will I know who won...but how!


Recovery Really Rocks! Don't miss out on yours!

[grrrr]

Hi Carol!

Nice plan. I do enjoy football season too.

I haven't been entirely sober, but not entirely smashed either. I turned down buying weed this weekend and can happily say I am not in that fog this morning. Yay! I am not hung over either and no booze in the house. Not bad for a Monday morning and a start to a sober week.

K

[CarolD]

Grrrr, Monday is a good day to make progress...
Tip-any day ending in Y is too.

Are you finding SMART helpful?

Always good to see you here....don't be a stranger

[grrrr]

I haven't done a whole lot with SMART past the first meeting I went to. The online meetings are too early and I have scheduled plans almost every weeknight that make it hard to go out to a f2f meeting. I know, I can always make time, but right now, I feel like it would be more stress than worth it.

I had read a lot of their documentation and have watched some UTube videos on mindfulness that someone recommended during an online meeting. (this one is pretty cool if anyone is interested. The related videos are interesting as well.)

I almost got some wine last night after my Spanish class, but drove home instead. After all of 5 minutes in my house the craving went away and I was perfectly relaxed without any wine. I can see that I have some strongly ingrained habits, but the need to actually indulge in them is getting much weaker. I am getting more comfortable with my own feelings and am happy to give those more of a chance rather than drowning them by using.

[Kez]

hi day 3 for me, felt really good about an hour ago now feel llike crap,,, dont know why.... i just dont want to drink.......

[CarolD]

Well....I do remember when I de toxed from alcohol
Day 3 was the worse and things got easier after that.


I sure hope you will find that true too.
Glad you are checking in ... Kez

[CarolD]

I hope y'all are planning for a productive positive weekend
that is certainly what I am doing.....

[grrrr]

Hello All -

I had a very positive weekend; traveled to see a friend for her baby shower. I am very happy for them, her husband has been sober a little over two years and is a great inspiration to me.

I am on day 4 today! Already been to the store for food and no booze. Nice to spend money on flowers instead of a bottle of wine.

I am taking it one day at a time and can pretty much predict my 4pm craving. It is getting easier to deal with and I am focusing on healthier habits. Going to the doctor tomorrow to deal with some softball injuries and planning to quit softball for some less impact exercise that will agree with me better.

[xpartyeee]

Hello Everyone Just wanted to say Hi! I hope Everyone is doing the best that they can. I am on day 6 off Heroin. Well a little about me I don't know if I was ready for recovery but I'm here and getting through it. I hit rock bottom and lost of everything hopefully this time will be the last time I go through this horrible cycle I seem to have repeated using each type of drug over the last 15 years. This last time I can say I have never felt more horrible ever. Luckily the really bad withdrawls only hit me for 3 days. Which really sucked because I started withdrawls well having to pack up my stuff and drive 12 hours from Pennsylvania back to Chicago. Let me tell you that was the worst drive ever but at the same time it did keep somewhat focused on something other then were to find a bundle and get straight. Getting away from everyone I new was a huge help. I'm sorry I'm sort of rambling on well. I just never used groups before and am kicking cold soo I need something to do to keep me sane I am alone and it sucks but it is what it is Soo with A REALY POSITIVE NOTE ITS GOOD TO BE ON THE WAY TO BEING AND STAYING STRAIGHT AND I HOPE EVERYONE ELSE CAN STAY STRAIGHT TOO!!! BEST OF LUCK!!!

Thanks

[CarolD]

(((grrrr)))
Good for you.....always glad to see you making progress...