Living In Sobriety Part 4

[Rowan]

Alright - sister is off the phone. Time for my marching orders. Talk later folks. My head is really bad right now but I love love love you all.

[Believe808]

Originally Posted by Rowan

And I wish you guys could find a job, too. It's one thing I am grateful for, my job security, being 20 years with the cops. Maybe if we all got a place together? We could share the bills and the upkeep. I would love to live with a bunch of recovering women. We would take turns shopping, cooking, gardening, cleaning. The house would always smell good, the windows would be open with a gentle breeze blowing the curtains in, windchimes and flowers, houseplants, candles, soft soft music, Buddhas. Wouldn't it just be the best?

Ro, yes, that would be the best. Someday, my friend, I truly believe that someday we will all be together.

[HideorSeek]

Silly Bee, I don't mind about the HOS... Elizabeth takes way too long to type, anyway.

OK, I'm getting off my soapbox and getting into the shower ...

[Believe808]

No, I will make that effort, because Elizabeth is really a beautiful name kinda like Eliza but with Beth added. And it does fit you, you have a lot of beauty inside of you and I am honored to have you here sharing it with me.

Have a nice shower Elizabeth and forget the damn Soccer team.

[Believe808]

You know, no matter how bad my day or mood is, I am really grateful to have found each and every one of you, somehow your love and friendship shines a light when I am in a dark place and helps me find my way. I am truly thankful for being able to recover with all of you.
Yesterday, when the forums were down, I didn't know what I was gonna do, but I did sign on to Recovery-Home and at first I was the only one there, but some did appear and again that light was turned on and I was once again laughing and getting out of myself. So that's another thing I am grateful for, that we have the other site to go to when this one fails to operate.

[Believe808]

Getting back to what people will say when we die versus while we are living, I hope that I am living the kind of life that is making a difference in peoples lives now, that there is no negativity associated with me and that when I am gone, those I have loved and helped will just continue to feel my love inside them.

[Believe808]

Okay, its me again Just got off phone, Interview tomorrow YAY 10:00 for receptionist position w/law offices. YAY YAY YAY YAY Turning it over, its not in my hands, What will be will be, and so on and so on and so on.

[Believe808]

why am I the only one posting here, when all you guys are hanging out down below?

[least]

I'm about to take a nap, for lack of anything better to do...

[tanyapmc]

I'm here. Just don't have much to say. Dealing with some depression. Ugh.

[Believe808]

Originally Posted by tanyapmc

I'm here. Just don't have much to say. Dealing with some depression. Ugh.

Alright Honey, we all need to get together for some laughs and love just to get ourselves out of the depression. This is for you my friend, just because I love you

[parentrecovers]

Originally Posted by stone

Is it the sister in the coffin, Ro?

[tanyapmc]

Thanks. I am feeling disconnected right now. From here and from my meetings. Being gone so much during the summer really is difficult. I am finding it hard to go to my meeting. When I am home I go everyday. It is my routine. During the summer my routine goes to hell.

My father in law is not doing well. Now the dr's are talking about doing radiation. To do that he would have to go to the hospital every day. They live over an hour from the hospital. I don't know how they could do that. My mother in law is really selfish. She wants to put him in a facility. Says she will visit him every day. I know she wouldn't. It is tough. They could come stay with us and I would take him every day. I doubt they will.and she would drive me crazy.

Thanks for letting me vent.

But I am clean and sober and very happy about that. The 17th will be 2 1/2 years. God's grace.

[nelco]

Originally Posted by Believe808

Okay, its me again Just got off phone, Interview tomorrow YAY 10:00 for receptionist position w/law offices. YAY YAY YAY YAY Turning it over, its not in my hands, What will be will be, and so on and so on and so on.

That is the best news I have heard all day. I will be praying hard for you and also praying they let you on computer if you get it lol...x



I am meeting my sponsee in a few hours and then we will travel to home group together.
Glad your "troubles" are over Stone lol. And maybe if your defects hurt you enough you will become willing to let go. Perhaps the "people in the rooms" will share about stuff that hurt them and you will know it hurts you too. I am never surprised at the answers I get through others. I can be worrying about something all day and go to a meeting to hear the sharing on....letting go or powerless or even more direct. I think we hear when we are ready to hear. I have been going to aa for a long time and I still hear some stuff for the first time cause I just couldn't hear or was not listening or was not ready........who knows.........more will be revealed

Least you deserve a : everyone else

[nelco]

tan...... you sound stressed.......look after YOU. try catch up with some meetings/support.

[Rowan]

This is a good place to connect, Tan. Right here. There is a lot of love and support on this thread. Are you at the RV location during the summer, and also with the in-laws? Is that why you don't have the routine that you usually follow with regards to meetings? Remember, your recovery must come first. I understand that you have other stuff going on, but we can't afford to get complacent, and to put other things first. I am right there beside you my sister.

My sister has a very busy office. The phone keeps ringing. This will be the easiest day ever if it means I can surf the net while she talks on the phone with clients.

And Bee - that's awesome about the job interview. Awesome.

[parentrecovers]

send me some support, folks. my friend is getting ready to call me....

[Believe808]

Tanya, just like Nel & Ro said, YOUR recovery MUST come before anything else. You will not be any help to your FIL if you don't have your recovery. You can see how not going to meetings is affecting you right now, do you really think you can be of any help feeling like you do right now? You know the drill Honey, meetings especially when you think you can't get to them or when you feel like sh*t. This board and this thread are really helpful but I don't believe that it takes the place of F2F meetings. You need to share what you have been going through. Please take time out for Tanya

Nel & Ro

I just made an appt to get hair cut, its gonna cost me a bit but I really need a hair cut and have been putting it off. Need a new style, a new look I have been unhappy with the way I look lately, put on some pounds (sad smiley inserted) hair just blah but with nice highlights (happy smiley inserted here) so I think I'm due. I will scrounge up the money because I AM WORTH IT.

[Believe808]

Originally Posted by parentrecovers

send me some support, folks. my friend is getting ready to call me....

K Turn it over honey. You have been the bestest friend he could ever ask for and you will continue to do what is right. I am sending good vibes and prayers your way.

[tanyapmc]

for you K.

Good for you Believe for getting your hair did. I did that yesterday. I had a coupon and got some $ off. I love that.

I am not at the river right now. I leave on Thurdays or Fridays and come home Sunday or Monday. We are leaving Friday this week and returning on Monday. Then we will be up there the entire next week.

I will go to meetings when we are up there for a week. Probably only 1 or 2 but will do it. And I have 2 AA friends coming up for that weekend. So that will help.

I am still going to meetings when I am home. But not feeling a "part of". I know that is me and not the members of my home group.

We are 1/2 way through Rv rental season. I WILL get through it.

In a perfect world I would bring my FIL here and take care of him and leave my selfish MIL up at her house. But that won't happen.

Serenity prayer!!

Thanks to all of you for your support. I knew I could count on you.

[nelco]

Originally Posted by parentrecovers

send me some support, folks. my friend is getting ready to call me....

support coming your way k!!

[nelco]

just made an appt to get hair cut, its gonna cost me a bit but I really need a hair cut and have been putting it off. Need a new style, a new look I have been unhappy with the way I look lately, put on some pounds (sad smiley inserted) hair just blah but with nice highlights (happy smiley inserted here) so I think I'm due. I will scrounge up the money because I AM WORTH IT.

you sure are worth it Bee!! I hope you look like a supa star!!

[Believe808]

Change of plans my daughters girlfriend who did my low lights, said she will cut my hair at no cost on Saturday, my daughter who can do a mean blow out, said she will blow my hair out tomorrow morning that way I don't have to spend 70.00 today for a hair cut. It would have cost me more than that with tip to shampooer and stylist. So I am grateful for my daughter again, and her gf for offering to cut my hair.

One thing good that is coming out of this no money business is that my kids are learning the value of money. They were so use to me paying everything for them that they really had no concept of just how much things cost. Now they are starting to be conservative in their spending habits. I am grateful that there is a lesson being learned here.

[scaredykat]

Hi Guys. My computer is driving me crazy today. I can't see any pictures on the computer today. One of the forums i belong to I can't get on at all. So there goes posting the readings that i do. I think part of it is our computer. We were having problems with our virus protection this morning too. Agh!

[parentrecovers]

ok. i'm turning it over now

gonna clean house.

everyone have a good day, and be nice to yourselves.

hugs, k