Goodbye Ranch.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
Goodbye Ranch.
Goodbye Ranch.
JJ got into a stupid fight trying to "protect" his girlfriend from some comment made by another resident.
He is staying at the sober living and I told him best of luck.
So sad.
I hope he decides to earn a living and finally make something of himself. He says he is clean, and I do believe him on that.
My message to him: "Stop putting someone else and their importance in your life ahead of your recovery!".
He is working with the sober living owner to get rent taken care of and will be actively seeking a job.
I told him I would not be giving money to support this. He says he is motivated, well lets just see.
I am really feeling DONE with his issues. He needs to take his life up and move with it.
JJ got into a stupid fight trying to "protect" his girlfriend from some comment made by another resident.
He is staying at the sober living and I told him best of luck.
So sad.
I hope he decides to earn a living and finally make something of himself. He says he is clean, and I do believe him on that.
My message to him: "Stop putting someone else and their importance in your life ahead of your recovery!".
He is working with the sober living owner to get rent taken care of and will be actively seeking a job.
I told him I would not be giving money to support this. He says he is motivated, well lets just see.
I am really feeling DONE with his issues. He needs to take his life up and move with it.
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Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 177
Sorry to hear this. My heart sank with you as I read your post. Its all too familiar to us moms. Ups, downs. Yes..."sigh!!"
Your message to JJ sounds exactly like what I would have said, and in fact did say just the other day to my son.
In these scenarios, I tend to get pissed...it lasts for a few days, but keeps me strong with my boundaries when I am angry.
Its always something "stupid" that in a different addiction free world seems almost insignificant, isn't it? A fight to "defend someone's honor", " giving someone a ride" and therefore blowing curfew because the other person made them late, helping others, defending others, at their own expense. If you think about it, you can almost sympathize... Almost...then when you think about it some more, it hits you...bam!!! Here I go again..empathizing at yet another excuse!!
I'm praying that JJ will pick up the pieces and move forward in his recovery. Behavior, consequences... Hugs to you and stay strong!
Your message to JJ sounds exactly like what I would have said, and in fact did say just the other day to my son.
In these scenarios, I tend to get pissed...it lasts for a few days, but keeps me strong with my boundaries when I am angry.
Its always something "stupid" that in a different addiction free world seems almost insignificant, isn't it? A fight to "defend someone's honor", " giving someone a ride" and therefore blowing curfew because the other person made them late, helping others, defending others, at their own expense. If you think about it, you can almost sympathize... Almost...then when you think about it some more, it hits you...bam!!! Here I go again..empathizing at yet another excuse!!
I'm praying that JJ will pick up the pieces and move forward in his recovery. Behavior, consequences... Hugs to you and stay strong!
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 13,497
Youth... we learn lessons the hard way, at times. When we have to find another place to live, its a struggle. he will learn from this. he has more to learn than just how to give up drugs, so try to be glad for each thing he has to learn to do for his self. I know its hard... but I wish my son was learning the things your son is right now. take heart.. you are doing well and learning at the same time how to make your boundaries strong, and for them to pay off for you.
wishing him luck, and that he learns some good stuff from this.
hugs to you.
wishing him luck, and that he learns some good stuff from this.
hugs to you.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
Thank you Mommas 
Staying away and out of his business is MY ongoing challenge. He picked up great tools and abilities for his sobriety at the Ranch and at Sally. Now its up to him. I do appreciate that the sober living people are working with him.
He is going to see his PO today to keep himself on the up and up with that area of his life. Hoping that goes well.
Staying away and out of his business is MY ongoing challenge. He picked up great tools and abilities for his sobriety at the Ranch and at Sally. Now its up to him. I do appreciate that the sober living people are working with him.
He is going to see his PO today to keep himself on the up and up with that area of his life. Hoping that goes well.
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My son got kicked out of rehab for sneaking the phone to call his girlfriend.
It took 10 years to get him back into rehab and he got kicked out for that?
I was going to the family group so I got kicked out too.
Don't they know what we go through?
I pray JJ does well and finds his way. I'm sorry you are going through this again.
It took 10 years to get him back into rehab and he got kicked out for that?
I was going to the family group so I got kicked out too.
Don't they know what we go through?
I pray JJ does well and finds his way. I'm sorry you are going through this again.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
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Thank you all for your support. JJ was told by his PO to
Get his ass back in a program or go to prison.
He is reaching out to S A tomorrow so hoping
He follows through. I am okay and he will be okay
At least for now. He was sober and emotional on the phone
Get his ass back in a program or go to prison.
He is reaching out to S A tomorrow so hoping
He follows through. I am okay and he will be okay
At least for now. He was sober and emotional on the phone
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
JJ got a job at Vons (its a grocery chain) and is in orientation on Wednesday May 27. He is working with the sober living and they are allowing him to stay while his disability check is in the process and the 67 year old house manager has given him a nice bicycle with a u lock to get him around. Now if his PO agrees after he starts working, he really is on his own. Momma out!
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Originally Posted by Ilovemysonjj 
JJ got a job at Vons (its a grocery chain) and is in orientation on Wednesday May 27. He is working with the sober living and they are allowing him to stay while his disability check is in the process and the 67 year old house manager has given him a nice bicycle with a u lock to get him around. Now if his PO agrees after he starts working, he really is on his own. Momma out!
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: grateful where at
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I have found for myself,, as I go through a circumstance and think this is horrible, has turned out to be such a blessing and it was exactly what was needed For my son. My son is 1 year 3 weeks sober. God does do miracles. Keep working on doing things for yourself. It may be exactly what your son needed cause you are out of the way.
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Update: PO says get back in the program. JJ can live in sober living until the 18th of June but his PO expects him back in a program by then. . He reached out to the ranch, no can do until the end of June, he reached out to SA, they will review his case tomorrow. I sent him 6 more "free" rehabs to check out since he didnt have internet access.
The travelling (recovering) addict show! He is still sober, he came over to the house for dinner on Memorial day and saw his family first time since January. He sounded a bit "down" today, but he understands why this is what he needs to do. He NOW has to do this.
Send the prayers
The travelling (recovering) addict show! He is still sober, he came over to the house for dinner on Memorial day and saw his family first time since January. He sounded a bit "down" today, but he understands why this is what he needs to do. He NOW has to do this.
Send the prayers
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 341
As hard as it may seem, you are lucky he has a PO involved calling the shots. That helps you to back out and not have to micromanage. You seemed to have grown stronger through all of this. Good for you! I certainly know this isn't easy for us moms. Hope JJ sticks to his recovery. It is a bit frustrating that having a job and living in a sober living isn't enough for the PO. So if JJ has to go back to rehab, guess he'll have to give up the job. They usually don't let you work in rehab. That'll be a toughie, but it's all better than going back to prison! Prayers for both of u.
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God has this one. JJ misses the comraderie of the guys in rehab.The house he is in is very safe and secure, but everyone there is a lot older than JJ and they are all surviving on SSI, only two of them work. He told me that the area that the house is in is close to his old stomping grounds and he is aware that the bad decision is one step away. Thanks Mommas for the support. I see JJ really stumbling and then picking himself up a lot more in the last 3 months so at least when he stumbles, he gets back up quickly instead of giving up and running backwards. Its like he is kicking and screaming his way into recovery.
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