Detox again
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 341
I completely understand what you are going through. It does conjure up a myriad of feelings. It is good he wants to go through with pursuing recovery again. At least you have the peace of mind of knowing he is safe tonight and while he is in detox. It seems God has answered your prayers with that bed you have reserved in San Diego. Keep up the faith and don't forget to take care of yourselves. Enjoy the peace you have at this time. Prayers and hugs for you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
Thank you all. Today JJ is clean. Today he has a life. The people at the detox are helping him with all of the details, he is filing for disability, which will give a bit of money to assist him for up to 90 days. He has been eating for the last few days and today he is feeling much better. I don't think he will be released until Monday, so I am going to confirm with the intake manager that Monday bright and early will be okay to get him into SA. God is so GOOD. I have been bawling off and on just in pent up sorrow, stress releasing and reserved hope.
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: CA
Posts: 10,681
I have those bawling sessions every now and then. The last one I had was at my mother's nursing home. I was so embarrassed. You cope and cope and cope and then burst and start all over again. We have regular life to deal with also.
Pamper yourself and get some rest when he is in the new program. I'm so glad it looks so hopeful.
Pamper yourself and get some rest when he is in the new program. I'm so glad it looks so hopeful.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
So far so good! I dropped off a sober and hopeful JJ at Salvation Army. The program is minimum 6 months. He plans to do that and then join the STEPS program, which is a work based support program that helps the members get employed, save money, pay down debts, etc. I told JJ don't bother calling me if he leaves this program. We prayed and I dropped him off to get himself enrolled in the program. It is now entirely up to him.
This detox really scared him (he had two absesses that looked awful when they admitted him) and he knows that without a solid foundation and a solid support system, he will not survive. I am sending prayers to all of the Mommas and Poppas who are dealing with their children struggling with addiction. It is the hardest thing EVER and I am cautiously optimistic but this one is in his court entirely.
This detox really scared him (he had two absesses that looked awful when they admitted him) and he knows that without a solid foundation and a solid support system, he will not survive. I am sending prayers to all of the Mommas and Poppas who are dealing with their children struggling with addiction. It is the hardest thing EVER and I am cautiously optimistic but this one is in his court entirely.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
Update: Still good and still hopeful. This is day three and he is in a minimum of 30 day blackout. My codie ways keep coming up, worrying and fretting with no evidence as to why I should be worried. Time to focus on MY needs and keep MY neck of the woods clean. Prayers going out to all Mommas and Poppas here 
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
Sad news: I got a call today from a friend of JJ's saying he left the program at Salvation Army. JJ had sent me a Facebook message today at 6:20 AM letting me know not to meet him at the church service today because "they put him on house restriction" and not 15 minutes after that "read" facebook post, I got a call from "Eddie" who told me he had gone to get his possessions from SA and had learned that JJ left the program a few days earlier (32 days clean in the program). Eddie also had called me the weekend before with glowing message that JJ was doing well. This somewhat smells fishy in that the call came in 15 minutes after I replied to JJ's facebook message at 8:00 AM on Sunday. Hmmm???? Anyways, I sent a note to JJ on Facebook letting him know I knew he left the program and hoped he would find a way to stay sober. Can I somehow let this entire thing go? It is so exhausting! I love my son but hate his lifestyle. I almost want to pretend he is a "hippie" back in the 60's who just left their family behind to be a bohemian. I am too old for this ShyTE.
I also got a very sad post today regarding a young man who successfully got out of jail,, built his life back up and today he passed away! 26 years old, one year older than my love. Not a friend of JJ's but still, too close too home.
Send prayers. I cannot do more than pray and detach. Please send up prayers for me for strength to not fall back to my old behaviors. I cannot control this, I did not cause this, I cannot cure this.
I feel sad again..... WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?????????
I also got a very sad post today regarding a young man who successfully got out of jail,, built his life back up and today he passed away! 26 years old, one year older than my love. Not a friend of JJ's but still, too close too home.
Send prayers. I cannot do more than pray and detach. Please send up prayers for me for strength to not fall back to my old behaviors. I cannot control this, I did not cause this, I cannot cure this.
I feel sad again..... WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?????????
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 349
I am so sorry Teresa for all you are going through right now and for the decision JJ has made. I am sending prayers for you, your family and JJ. I personally know how hard all of this is to go through. Sending hugs as well!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: New York
Posts: 277
Ilovemysonjj, I am so very sorry. I will pray for you and please feel a warm blanket around you filled with love .protection.strength...hope.prayers, I hate this freakin disease you have given me strength in past. I wish ihad some wisdom. Only to see I feel your pain and pray you work your tools the best you can. Hugs to you darling.
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
I'm so sorry Teresa. of course you feel sad. No matter how strong you are in working on yourself and trying to let JJ live his own life, this is your son, the child you love, so it hurts. Sending prayers that he will be safe and that you can find peace and comfort and know that we all care. I'm sorry too, for the loss of the young man.. 
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: west coast
Posts: 1,068
It is a devastating roller coaster of emotions. It's hard not to be optimistic when we think they are doing well and devastated when we think they are not. I try to remind myself that "we are all on our own paths," but it still hurts. Detachment and prayer are the only things that seem to help.
My prayer is that all addicts and alcoholics find recovery and health and that their families live to see it. Take good care of you.
My prayer is that all addicts and alcoholics find recovery and health and that their families live to see it. Take good care of you.
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