Just For Today- April 28- Who Really Gets Better?

[Hope]

April 28
Who really gets better?

"We can also use the steps to improve our attitudes. Our best thinking got us into trouble. We recognize the need for change."

Basic Text, p. 53


When new in recovery, most of us had at least one person we just couldn't stand. We thought that person was the rudest, most obnoxious person in the program. We knew there was something we could do, some principle of recovery we could practice to get over the way we felt about this person—but what? We asked our sponsor for guidance. We were probably assured, with an amused smile, that if we just kept coming back, we'd see the person get better. That made sense to us. We believed that the steps of NA worked in the lives of everyone. If they could work for us, they could work for this horrible person, too.

Time passed, and at some point we noticed that the person didn't seem as rude or obnoxious as before. In fact, he or she had become downright tolerable, maybe even likeable. We got a pleasant jolt as we realized who had really gotten better. Because we had kept coming back, because we had kept working the steps, our perception of this person had changed. The person who'd plagued us had become "tolerable" because we'd developed some tolerance; he or she had become "likeable" because we'd developed the ability to love.

So who really gets better? We do! As we practice the program, we gain a whole new outlook on those around us by gaining a new outlook on ourselves.


Just for today: As I get better, so will others. Today, I will practice tolerance and try to love those I meet.

pg. 122


Just For Today Daily Meditation is the property of Narcotics Anonymous ©

[Time4Change]

Felt the need to comment on this "Just For Today" because I found myself laughing out loud while reading it.

I remember when I first came into the rooms of NA, there was this gal who was really tan and attractive and wore the cutest outfits, but she was always in a hurry, seemed annoyed at everything and everyone, would pop in to the meetings late and leave early, complained all the time, and didn't really reach out to me as the newcomer like the other women did. She became secretary of the Monday night meeting, so I decided I didn't want to go Monday night, because she'd "ssshhhh!" at people if they were talking/whispering during the meeting, she was kinda rude, and didn't seem too thrilled with her recovery. I wondered, "Why'd she take on this secretary commitment anyway? She obviously doesn't want to do it".

My sponsor asked me why I wasn't going on Monday nights, so I told her about my feelings. She smiled and said, "Say a prayer for her". Ugh! So I did. It felt weird, but I did. It almost seemed like she started annoying me even MORE after that. Then, once in a while, visitors would ask me if I was her sister. Some would call me HER NAME! I'd say, "No, I'm Kelly. You're thinking of ____". (Real funny there, God. Gotta great sense of humor.) I'm probably five years older, 20 pounds heavier, and a lot more pale than she is. The only similarity is our hairstyle and color.

Funny, but she and I started talking with each other and laughing about people getting us mixed up all the time, and wouldn't you know it, we started becoming friends. I learned more about her life, her busy work schedule and the reasons why she seemed so rushed all the time, her desire to have a baby and her jealousy of me, and other women, who had husbands and children at home, her insecurities kept her from being too overly friendly to people, she was struggling with her addiction and her character defects, just like everyone else. Why had I singled her out, I wondered. Was it because I had actually identified with some of her defects? Was I jealous of her? *ding-ding-ding*

Time has passed, and now, almost a year later, she is the GSR for the Saturday morning women's meeting I secretary, so we work closely together at our business meetings, and we even shared a hotel room at the NA convention a few weeks ago. I really adore her now! She's kind and loving (once you get to know her), and struggles with life's problems just like me. She laughs at her bitchiness sometimes and expresses a desire to cool that behavior down and stop rushing all the time. God and NA helped open my heart and my eyes.

Hopefully this situation will help me in the future when I seem too quick to judge someone else's behaviors, attitudes, or recovery.

NA rocks! Thanks for letting me share that.

[Hope]

Thanks for sharing that, Kelly! That was a really great post!