Almost but didn't........ - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

hopealwayz · 04-28-2005, 02:14 PM

I have been having bad cravings today. I almost gave in. I was about to order some pills because that thought has been haunting my mind. All of a sudden, I thought of how I would feel afterwards. I didn't go thru with it.

It wasn't worth it. Instead, I went for a walk in this beautiful day and went to subway to get some food. I am glad now that I didn't give in to my craving. I feel stronger.

I am staying clean hour by hour now.

I'll handle each day as it comes. RIGHT NOW, I'm clean and sober.

Cathy31 · 04-28-2005, 02:38 PM

Hope thinking of you - you did great. For me what helps is thinking it THROUGH the way you did..the consequences and also finding a meeting...anywhere!!!! It passes.
Well done
Cathy31
x

nutz · 04-28-2005, 03:35 PM

good for you hope

shestruggles · 04-28-2005, 04:42 PM

Good for you!
That's a great method to get over the dang cravings. I try to picture the 'after effects' as vividly as I picture the high or the nice feelings I could get from using.
I mean, really, the end result, the misery, shame and pain, is just as intense, probably more intense, than that first taste. After some practice, I'm starting to get real good at visualizing the come down, as soon as the craving pops in my head. It's a simple, but effective way to get through a tough day.

hopealwayz · 04-28-2005, 09:52 PM

In 9 minutes, I will be on day 7. I feel better after a week. I think using the "think through" method works. The end result is always the same. Insanity....repeating the same things, expecting different results. Thankfully, today we have a choice and hope for a beautiful future!

Wishing you another sober 24!!

Lots of love,
Hope

shestruggles · 04-28-2005, 10:08 PM

Welcome to day 7, hope!

erino134 · 04-29-2005, 08:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopealwayz

I am staying clean hour by hour now.

I'll handle each day as it comes. RIGHT NOW, I'm clean and sober.

Ditto

hopealwayz · 04-29-2005, 08:39 AM

I hope I'm thru with the withdrawals. I'm glad I'm finally feeling better. I hope I never have to go back to that. The pain was to great but my hope is starting to return. I'm going to do everything I can to keep my head above water and then reach the sky.

Paulie · 04-29-2005, 09:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hopealwayz

In 9 minutes, I will be on day 7. I feel better after a week. I think using the "think through" method works. The end result is always the same. Insanity....repeating the same things, expecting different results. Thankfully, today we have a choice and hope for a beautiful future!

Wishing you another sober 24!!

Lots of love,
Hope

Wolverine · 04-29-2005, 10:47 AM

I am going thru the same as you and is also on day seven. And is still clean!

hopealwayz · 04-29-2005, 12:48 PM

Hang in there Wolverine!!

I started having cravings again....it is driving me crazy with the thoughts of ordering pain meds. I would be more relaxed in my life and feel 'happy'. *BUT* then the flipside: keep taking the pills and they will start to make me mean, moody, stressed out, forgetful, depressed, full of guilt and shame, sad, hopeless, etc.

Add to the list, good thing for me to think about.

Still clean and hanging on.

splendra · 04-29-2005, 01:01 PM

((((hopealwayz)))))

erino134 · 04-29-2005, 01:47 PM

Hope. DON'T ORDER. Do you know how much money I have spent on those online "drug dealing pharmacies". I almost feel like getting involved somehow in getting them shut down. (but what if I change my mind about quitting.) lol.

The hard part for me is that nothing really bad ever happened. (besides having my husband terribly hurt that I was lying, besides driving home barely able to stay awake, besides using literally thousands of dollars on this, etc. etc. etc.) When I write that down.... it sounds so absurd. But when I'm just thinking... I think.... I would really like a few right now. I'll just take a few once in a while (HAHAHAHAHAHA).

I have a zillion reasons to quit. But the one that I really focus on is.... the question I ask myself...."Do I plan to keep doing this forever? When will I stop?" I used to actually tell myself over and over again... I can't stop now, too much going on. I'll probably feel more like quitting later. Dumb Dumb Dumb.

I'm struggling too. I miss my little buddies so much. I crave all the time. Like I have a VERY messy house to clean tomorrow. Unusally messy. So that's a lot of hard work. I used to look forward to that day with my pills. Now I HATE the idea of cleaning anything.

By the way. I detoxed on suboxone. It saved my life. I've never been able to make it through the w/d before. Too hard to take a vacation from life for a week.

Keep going.

WNY Addict · 04-29-2005, 10:38 PM

Look at staying sober just for today. I tell myself that everday when I wake up... and it's been working for over 2 years now.

Keep it as simple as possible

04-28-2005, 02:14 PM	#1 (permalink)
hopealwayz Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: somewhere Posts: 3,514	Almost but didn't........ I have been having bad cravings today. I almost gave in. I was about to order some pills because that thought has been haunting my mind. All of a sudden, I thought of how I would feel afterwards. I didn't go thru with it. It wasn't worth it. Instead, I went for a walk in this beautiful day and went to subway to get some food. I am glad now that I didn't give in to my craving. I feel stronger. I am staying clean hour by hour now. I'll handle each day as it comes. RIGHT NOW, I'm clean and sober.

04-28-2005, 03:35 PM	#3 (permalink)
nutz doing the inside job Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: planet happy Posts: 545	good for you hope __________________ practice, practice, practice What had been the source of devastation became the seed of a new me.

04-28-2005, 04:42 PM	#4 (permalink)
shestruggles Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: waysouth Posts: 394	Good for you! That's a great method to get over the dang cravings. I try to picture the 'after effects' as vividly as I picture the high or the nice feelings I could get from using. I mean, really, the end result, the misery, shame and pain, is just as intense, probably more intense, than that first taste. After some practice, I'm starting to get real good at visualizing the come down, as soon as the craving pops in my head. It's a simple, but effective way to get through a tough day. __________________ "Things do not change; we change" (Henry David Thoreau)

04-28-2005, 10:08 PM	#6 (permalink)
shestruggles Member Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: waysouth Posts: 394	Welcome to day 7, hope! __________________ "Things do not change; we change" (Henry David Thoreau)

04-29-2005, 01:01 PM	#12 (permalink)
splendra the girl can't help it Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: splendraville Posts: 4,817 Blog Entries: 3	((((hopealwayz))))) __________________ nice has a hisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

04-28-2005, 02:38 PM	#2 (permalink)
Cathy31 1 bite&all resistance crumbles Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: IRELAND Posts: 1,871	Hope thinking of you - you did great. For me what helps is thinking it THROUGH the way you did..the consequences and also finding a meeting...anywhere!!!! It passes. Well done Cathy31 x

04-28-2005, 09:52 PM	#5 (permalink)
hopealwayz Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: somewhere Posts: 3,514	In 9 minutes, I will be on day 7. I feel better after a week. I think using the "think through" method works. The end result is always the same. Insanity....repeating the same things, expecting different results. Thankfully, today we have a choice and hope for a beautiful future! Wishing you another sober 24!! Lots of love, Hope

04-29-2005, 08:39 AM	#8 (permalink)
hopealwayz Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: somewhere Posts: 3,514	I hope I'm thru with the withdrawals. I'm glad I'm finally feeling better. I hope I never have to go back to that. The pain was to great but my hope is starting to return. I'm going to do everything I can to keep my head above water and then reach the sky.

04-29-2005, 10:47 AM	#10 (permalink)
Wolverine Member Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Norway Posts: 35	I am going thru the same as you and is also on day seven. And is still clean!

04-29-2005, 12:48 PM	#11 (permalink)
hopealwayz Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: somewhere Posts: 3,514	Hang in there Wolverine!! I started having cravings again....it is driving me crazy with the thoughts of ordering pain meds. I would be more relaxed in my life and feel 'happy'. BUT then the flipside: keep taking the pills and they will start to make me mean, moody, stressed out, forgetful, depressed, full of guilt and shame, sad, hopeless, etc. Add to the list, good thing for me to think about. Still clean and hanging on.

04-29-2005, 01:47 PM	#13 (permalink)
erino134 still moment by moment Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: on my way back to me Posts: 83	Hope. DON'T ORDER. Do you know how much money I have spent on those online "drug dealing pharmacies". I almost feel like getting involved somehow in getting them shut down. (but what if I change my mind about quitting.) lol. The hard part for me is that nothing really bad ever happened. (besides having my husband terribly hurt that I was lying, besides driving home barely able to stay awake, besides using literally thousands of dollars on this, etc. etc. etc.) When I write that down.... it sounds so absurd. But when I'm just thinking... I think.... I would really like a few right now. I'll just take a few once in a while (HAHAHAHAHAHA). I have a zillion reasons to quit. But the one that I really focus on is.... the question I ask myself...."Do I plan to keep doing this forever? When will I stop?" I used to actually tell myself over and over again... I can't stop now, too much going on. I'll probably feel more like quitting later. Dumb Dumb Dumb. I'm struggling too. I miss my little buddies so much. I crave all the time. Like I have a VERY messy house to clean tomorrow. Unusally messy. So that's a lot of hard work. I used to look forward to that day with my pills. Now I HATE the idea of cleaning anything. By the way. I detoxed on suboxone. It saved my life. I've never been able to make it through the w/d before. Too hard to take a vacation from life for a week. Keep going.

04-29-2005, 10:38 PM	#14 (permalink)
WNY Addict Just For Today Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Western New York Posts: 130	Look at staying sober just for today. I tell myself that everday when I wake up... and it's been working for over 2 years now. Keep it as simple as possible __________________ God, take my will & my life, Guide me in my recovery, Show me how to live, Just For Today! Identify with the sick and suffering addict... don't judge!

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