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Alcohol Addiction 12 Steps
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10-19-2004, 10:49 AM
| #1 (permalink) |
| New and Unsure  Join Date: May 2004 Location: phoenix az
Posts: 191
| Am I diffrent?
Do any of you find that a few week before you clean day the urges and thought come back in full force? I celebrate a clean day in 8 more days. I find my self spending a little to much time in my head. I find that my mind is spending alot of time thinking about how it was when I did use. It is kinda scary! |
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10-19-2004, 12:17 PM
| #2 (permalink) |
| an addict named Mike Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Jacksonville, Florida
Posts: 188
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Hi jennifer!! I'm an addict named Mike. Yup, I get that all the time as I approach an aniversary. I even remember when I was getting my 30 day, 90 day, 6 months, ext.. the same thing. I typically have using dreams around those times and my thoughts seem to be focused on "how things use to be" more than usual. As long as I stay vigilant and stay aware of the fact that its just another way my disease is trying to get me, I'm OK. To answer your question, NO, you don't suffer from terminal uniqueness!! Most other people in recovery experience the exact same thing!!
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10-19-2004, 02:16 PM
| #4 (permalink) |
| Learning To Let It Be  Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: New York
Posts: 156
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Around my early dates (30, 60, 90) I was so elated I can't remember anything else. By the time the 6, 9, 1, year, and 18 month anniversaries came, the thought of using came on stronger with each one. I'm not quite at 2 years yet but if I get there, we'll see what happens... Stepping Through Life...  |
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10-19-2004, 02:20 PM
| #5 (permalink) |
| New and Unsure Join Date: May 2004 Location: phoenix az
Posts: 191
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Atleast I know I am no diffrent from the rest of you. It is really starting to trip me up a little. I find that my meeting attendence is going down and the things that I am doing insead of meetings is not the most healthy for my recovery. But I am trying to refocus after a weekend of living it up CLEAN this weekend for my boirthday. I really get bad this time of year because my borthday and clean day are with in two weeks. I can do this. Thanks Guys! |
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10-19-2004, 02:43 PM
| #6 (permalink) |
| An Addict name Jerome.......  Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Whitesburg, Georgia
Posts: 186
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Hey jennifer, addict name Jerome here. Even though I have Hepatitis-C with Cirrhosis of the liver and the last time I used I plan out my suicide, and by the grace of God I did not go thru with it but instead came back and picked up my last white chip, I can still catch myself wanting to romance the ideal of using again. When I take my will back and try to run on my on, I slide right back into insanity. When I leave my will in the care of God I can ask him to take care of these thoughts and he does by showing me what is waiting for me to pick up. An ex-basketball player thinks of playing basketball, ex-bankrobber thinks of robbing banks, and a recovering addict thinks of using, but than WE call our sponsor, and get to a meeting and share about it, and WE don't use. Your doing the right thing and you're going to make it.
__________________ Imagine "All The People Sharing All The World"......john lennon "There's a whole lot more of us freaks then they are those beautiful people"......frank zappa |
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10-19-2004, 04:42 PM
| #7 (permalink) |
| Learning To Let It Be Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: New York
Posts: 156
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Jennifer, none of us are really different from eachother. As the masks go and the honesty grows, so does the identification. I can see a bit of myself in every person I meet (addict and earthling) and a bit of me in each one of them. Stepping Through Life... |
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10-19-2004, 05:15 PM
| #8 (permalink) |
| Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Rome, NY
Posts: 2
| You are NOT alone!!
Even after 5 years CLean and sober I found that my disease was STILL ALIVE AND WELL!! AND it seems that it is when things are going better for me than ever THAT is when I must really watch myself and remember HOW BADLY I FELT right after the last time I used!!! So, yes, anniversaries and special days can be some of the hardest to get through!!
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10-27-2004, 12:26 PM
| #9 (permalink) |
| New and Unsure Join Date: May 2004 Location: phoenix az
Posts: 191
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I DID IT! My mind was playing some wicked games with me last night. But I decided I have made it this far and this year has been hell in many ways that I could make it one more night. And when I woke up this morning I have 8 years clean and that evil desire has left for now! |
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10-27-2004, 02:24 PM
| #10 (permalink) |
| we're all mad here!  Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: a padded room with bars
Posts: 1,687
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Yaaaaay Jennifer! Recovering addict named Ann here. I'm only at a year, but I've encountered some problem times. Mine were: 1 month, 6 months, then my year. I've been warned to expect one at 16 months.
__________________ The duke had a mind that ticked like a clock and, like a clock, it regularly went cuckoo. ---------Terry Pratchett |
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10-27-2004, 03:41 PM
| #11 (permalink) |
| Vision of Hope  Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Living on This side of the green!!
Posts: 1,062
|  Keep it in Today!! :boneslft
__________________ We get relief through the Twelve Steps which are essential to the recovery process, because they are a new, spiritual way of life that allows us to participate in our own recovery. We Do Recover Todd J. |
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10-27-2004, 07:33 PM
| #16 (permalink) |
| Truth is the only lasting joy  Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Trenton, NJ
Posts: 241
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Congratulations Jennifer, Yeah, those bugaboos get at all of us around anniversary time... You made it through another day, time to celebrate!!  You are a miracle!!
__________________ Work like you don't need money, Love like you've never been hurt, And dance like no one's watching  |
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