kickthehabit15

Hi, I have noticed how narcotics have improved my mood and problems and decided to take them recretionally. Boy was this a big mistake..

It all started in college, as a college football player and 4 year starter at wide receiver, I got hit an awful lot, and this came with many concussions, broken bones,and chronic muscle and none pain, and last but not least prescriptions of narcotics. At first, I never abused them and only used them for pain, however after I got out of college I quickly learned about the real world. I used to smoke marijuana everyday and loved the feeling and how it helped to pass time but after graduation I realized that jobs aren't too happy with potheads so I suddenly quit to get a job in the Biology field. However, this came with a sense of panic as I smoked everyday for 5 years and needed something to take the edge off that didn't take 30 plus days to get out of my system. So this is where my percocet addiction allll began.. Also worth noting, I know many people who have access to percocet and different mgs to where I can call or text 10 different people in a day and odds are, 1 of them will call me back with the goodies..

I thought suddenly after stopping marijuana that I needed something to get high on everyday and take me out of the real world stresses so I turned to 5 mg percocet. The lowest dose and with such a small tolerance, 1 5mg pill got me high for hours and made me feel so amazing!! At first, I knew the dangers of addiction and narcotics, so I told myself I would take 1 5mg at night after work to take the stress down and simply let me escape from my problems in life and have a good time. This was fine for 1 or 2 months and I felt I had complete control over the pills, however about a month later, I noticed that the 1 5mg percocet wasn't making me feel as euphoric nor was it lasting hours anymore. This was a problem, so I started taking 1 and a half or 2 of them just 1 time a night while all my friends smoked or drank. I still felt like 10 mg a day easnt bad at all and the tylenol in them I was consuming was only 650 mg and I was fine. I thought I had it all under control and figured out, little did I know what I was getting myself into. However, I had good friends who were doing way high dosages a day, taking them multiple times a day so I thought I was golden only taking my 10mg a day.

Then one night I decided that percocet made me feel so good and energetic that I should try taking 1 before work. I suddenly fell in love because it made those 8 hours go by so fast, I become much more likable by co-workers and nnicer, everyone saw me as a extemely hard worker who was always happy and in a good mood, little did they know, it was because I was high on percocet. This went on for weeks at a time to months and I them realized I was not only taking them at work but after work and at night! 3 times a day, constantly thinking about that high that it overtook all my thoughts and concerns in life. My tolerance quickly built and my money started to decrease rapidly. I live with my parents and make good money with no bills. So the concern of cost of these percocet was never a problem in till 6 months later after starting to take that 5 mg pill that had gotten bad and here I am now.

I am currently addicted to these percocet heavily and spend on average 300 to 350 dollars a week. I take on average 25/30 mgs at a time 3 different times a day. Once when I wake up, Then another 25 to 30 mg 6 hours later, and another 30 mg 3 hours before bed. I am currently on suspension at work for failing a random drug test and admitted into a solutions program taking classes. My pill addiction has concerned my friends, family, and girlfriend very much and has caused a lot of fights. I spend my whole day looking for them and trying to buy as much as I can so I can feel that since of security knowing I have enough to get me through the next couple days with me being able to take them 3 times a day and stay high all day. The 1 or 2 times I did try to quit, I made it a max 2 days and the withdrawls made me fold into a deep depression as well as experiening terrible withdrawls such as insomnia, restless legs, stomach pain, depression, sweating, chills, fever, irritablitly, and anxiety. Everyone I try to taper I do good until the dose drops to where I can't get high and then I always take more than I should to get that high. I am currently Fed up with this cycle and spending all my money and want support and feedback from other people who are going through this. I was on top of the world 6 months ago graduating from college with a bio chem degree and being 23 years old and healthy from athletics and playing football my whole life. My life is now falling apart quickly as I'm on the brink of losing m. Job, all my money, health. And relationships with people. I have 7 perc 5s left and don't plan to get anymore. I am going to take them today and try to start fresh tomorrow and deal with the withdrawls and get my life back on track. Please help me with ideas on how to beat this horrible addiction and these devil pills before I destroy my life and all I have worked for my whole life. I want to get better and be happy without being high on aanything!! Thanks

kickthehabit15

If anyone else is looking to beat their addiction, we can do it together and help each other on here by venting and encouraging one another not to fold under the circumstances of withdrawls or cravings. I really want to get clean and I know there are people out there like me who want to be clean as well and need support and people to talk to too who are going through the same phases and troubles as they are. Its easy for friends and family to try and support but hard to take advice bbecause they don't necessarily know what we are going through as percocet addicts so therefore, is harder to take advice from them or feel the support as much. I just want and need support from other people who have been through this and beat it or who are currently going through this addiction like I am, I know I can do this! And I want to do it now!!

Fluffer

Hey KTH,

Welcome to the forum although I'm sad to see why you're here. This time of night is kind of dead around here, so hopefully you'll get more feedback in the morning. I have no real experience with pills (booze was my thing) but it certainly sounds like you are fully addicted and need help to quit them completely. Might I suggest you consider going to inpatient rehab and doing whatever it takes to get clean? It looks like your work and everyone already knows there is a problem. You are so young and have so much to live for, please do whatever it takes to stop this thing now before you throw away your life. Like you said, those pills can be fiendishly hard to kick, but if you get sober for a while you will be able to beat them. Rootin' for you!!!

kickthehabit15

Thanks a lot, as you can see, this addiction has gotten to the point where I lose sleep as night like tonight thinking about what I have gotten myself into. I have heavily considered in patient rehab and think I'm going to go if I don't make it through this time. Tomorrow marks day 1 and I'm going to do what I can to avoid relapsing!

Fluffer

Well, since you played college football for four years I'm pretty sure you have the self-discipline and mental toughness to beat this thing. But addiction is not just a battle of wills. You would definitely benefit from learning about the addiction because it typically works by playing tricks with your mind, tricks which can be recognized and neutralized with some knowledge. So even if you don't go to rehab I would recommend you go to counseling, read books on addiction, go to meetings and/or just read a bunch on this website. Good luck!

Piglet21

Hey!

So I'm new on here, but seem to be in the same boat as you. Ironically, I am a Biology student and am in my last year. I developed an addiction to hydrocodone and oxycotin, very similar to Percocet and Vicodin, after I had two weeks of recovery from a tonsillectomy. I was taking high doses of this stuff around the clock, so when I actually felt well enough two weeks later, I stopped cold turkey. But that was not good. Like you, I got chills, night sweats, restless legs, headaches, and suffered from even worse depression. I then started taking small doses at night to calm down and actually get some sleep. Now I all I think about all day is when I can take a dose or two of the drugs to feel better. I want to get off too, but I also know what it feels like to be off them. How have you proceeded your recovery? Do you have any tips?

Familyhelper151

You need to get off the percocet. It is doing so much damage internally and bringing your addiction to a worse and worse level.

Narcotic anonymous meetings are going to help you immensely, but the first step is going! Please go!!

Gmoney

As an NA member I've learned not to give advice (medical or otherwise), but I will share my experience, strength and hope. When I reached my "bottom" and became willing to do whatever it took to recover from the horror of drug addiction I sought professional help. My history of using was that I could always stop using for brief periods, but I'd never stay stopped. After a 45 day stay in rehab it was suggested to me that I attend NA meetings. In NA I was given more suggestions:

1] go to 90 meetings for 90 days
2] join a home group
3] get an NA Basic Text and read it
4] get a sponsor
5] work the 12 steps
6] get involved in service
7] don't use no matter what
8] keep coming back

In NA I met people who were very much like me. They had been where I was and found a way out. NA helped me find a new way to live and it's available to you...

G