hey everyone- thanks as always for your sweet replies. i am okay today- struggling not to call my ex- but that will go away- i miss my baby so much- i am seeing her sunday like i said, and i can not wait. there is a guy in my meetings i am hanging out with a lot, he is JUST a friend- (good god that's the last thing i need right now) but he has good sobriety and he said he is noticing a chane in me- like he can see i have more respect for myself- and i feel like i really do. it is wonderful being my own person. i mean, i still miss my ex, and my daughter, but when the focus is 100% on me, and i am doing all this work for myself- and for NO other reason, i can't help but have respect for myself. that's why i'm here- that's why i'm trying to stay sober- to respect myself so i don't have to numb myself with crack and coke and x and dust and k, and all the other garbage i put into my body on a daily basis- how could i have any respect for myself then? how could i have respect for myself in sobriety if i wasn't doing it for ME? (whoa) i got deep there for a minute! anyway- thanks again for all the replies, and NASHVILLE, you're no loser cause you're losing a job- just going through normal things all of us addicts have to go through i guess. i'm lucky i still have my job- luckier to be able to chat on this thing at work all day :-) peace and love to all of you today and everyday!!
nicole
today i am as strong as i choose to be
08-27-2004, 11:40 AM
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