JFT June 16th - Accepting Life

[Gmoney]

June 16

Accepting life

“Some things we must accept, others we can change. The wisdom to know the difference comes with growth in our spiritual program.”

Basic Text, p. 92

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It’s relatively easy to accept the things we like—it’s the things we don’t like that are hard to accept. But remaking the world and everyone in it to suit our tastes would solve nothing. After all, the idea that the world was to blame for all our problems was the attitude that kept us using—and that attitude nearly killed us.

In the course of working the steps, we begin to ask ourselves hard questions about the roles we ourselves have played in creating the unacceptable lives we’ve lived. In most cases, we’ve found that what needed changing was our own attitude and our own actions, not the people, places, and things around us.

In recovery, we pray for wisdom to know the difference between what can and can’t be changed. Then, once we see the truth of our situation, we pray for the willingness to change ourselves.

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Just for today: Higher Power, grant me the wisdom to know the difference between what can be changed and what I must accept. Please help me gratefully accept the life I’ve been given.



Copyright © 1991-2008 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

[REZ]

The wisdom to know the difference is often not easy for me to acquire. I often find myself trying to change things, such as other people, and it takes me a while to acquire the wisdom to know that I need to accept those things. There are no short-cuts to wisdom: it just takes time and effort.

[Gmoney]

In most cases, we’ve found that what needed changing was our own attitude and our own actions, not the people, places, and things around us.

So true for me.

[Lily]

For me it is kind of a relief to learn that I cannot change ppl, places or things. I think I was so used to "thinking" I could control things that now I can just rest and work on myself. :-)

[kj3880]

Yeah, I'm not there yet. I'm still working on not trying to control other people and fix them. Since I can't seem to stop myself from doing it, my current policy is to walk away from them when I can't stop nagging. Just walk away, hang up the phone, stop posting, close the door. That's the best I can do for now. I must be a codependant addict. Ugh. Why am I like that? I can't even accept myself right now. I feel uncomfortable in my own skin today.
kj

[Africa Life]

This is quite a big one. In my past I have tried to change just about everyone around me which implies that I am perfect and I am far from it. For me it is a character defect that doesnt win friends or influence people in fact it alienates the people closest to me. I have learned that the wisest thing that I can do in most situations is to be silent and just observe. Hindsight often tells me more than any snap judgement could.