Need a new brain

[TONYTEXAS]

Each day I feel like using more and more. I really wish I could just use once, but I know I cant. Im an addict. I woke up really messed up today. Dreamt about an ex and how she didnt want to be with me and now im trying to pray about these situations and not let fake things create my day. I just picked up 18 months on Wednesday too. I dont know whats going on here. Thanks for letting me share.

[Gmoney]

Congrats on your 18 months!!

Feelings aren't always facts and dreams are just dreams. With over a year clean now, I'm sure you've had thoughts of using before and thoughts of unfavorable situations. Remember that you have some control now and you don't have to use no matter how you feel. You're doing the right thing by talking about whatever is bothering you. Getting it out in the open helps you to see your ideas for what they really are, and it allows others to offer support. Hang in there, thoughts of using or bad situations will come and go (no matter how long we stay clean). We often say that it's our disease "checking in to see if we're ready to check out." It'll pass and will get better. You'll see.

[REZ]

It should come as no surprise that an addict will think about using drugs. That's part of the disease. The key is to try not get to uptight about it, not obsess on it. No one ever got high just by thinking of using. Just let the thought go when it comes. This too shall pass.

[TONYTEXAS]

Originally Posted by GarryW

Congrats on your 18 months!!

Feelings aren't always facts and dreams are just dreams. With over a year clean now, I'm sure you've had thoughts of using before and thoughts of unfavorable situations. Remember that you have some control now and you don't have to use no matter how you feel. You're doing the right thing by talking about whatever is bothering you. Getting it out in the open helps you to see your ideas for what they really are, and it allows others to offer support. Hang in there, thoughts of using or bad situations will come and go (no matter how long we stay clean). We often say that it's our disease "checking in to see if we're ready to check out." It'll pass and will get better. You'll see.

Thanks! Its kinda scary like my body will move without me knowing it and put drugs into it without being able to stop it. I guess that is the fact that Im powerless once I pick up a drug. I shared about it last night and with my sponsor. Today is going better

[TONYTEXAS]

Originally Posted by REZ

It should come as no surprise that an addict will think about using drugs. That's part of the disease. The key is to try not get to uptight about it, not obsess on it. No one ever got high just by thinking of using. Just let the thought go when it comes. This too shall pass.

Yeah thats true. Its funny though I used for many years and with this short amount of time in recovery I think everything should be better.

[mackie]

Hi, Tony.......

I always find myself stressed when coming around a "date"..........i.e. 6 months, a year, 18 months, etc. Maybe it's because we actually expect to fail, when in fact we are doing the next, right thing to get to point B and SUCCEEDING!

In my opinion, addictive thoughts really never leave us............but certainly addictive behaviors can be controlled. Don't be complacent, don't get bored, and in the famous words of WINDYSAN, don't do dope.

Congrats on your clean time!