Step 8

[Chance]

"We made a list of all the persons that we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all."

This step isn't that hard, but yet it isn't that easy either. I know that for me I just finished my list, I just finished answering all of the questions that the book suggested that I answer. I have found some fear there of making the amends. Yet I know today that that fear really isn't real. Usually the things that I fear or when I think something is going to happen usually doesn't ever turn out the way in which I think it is going to turn out.

One thing that we must do is to get honest with ourselves and others and that isn't easy for any of us to do. I am grateful that I am learning and continue to learn as I process all of my life through the Steps of NA. NA has been a life saver for me this time. I think that the biggest thing for me this time is that I became willing to do whatever I had to in order to get where I am and not only that but to get where I want to be in life.

Life is going to happen and I am grateful that I was able to complete yet another part of building my house of recovery. Thanks for allowing me to share.

With Love and Respect

Vic

[SaTiT]

Thanks for shring Vic.

I thought #6 seperated the men from the boys....holy schmoly was i wrong.lol

[Peter]

No Vic ,for me making a list was not hard......but the follow up in Step 9 was a little more difficult.

My Step 8 list was made up in three parts;

1) Amends that could be made immediately.

This list includes people whom I owed apologies , and in some instances
money.

2) Amends that needed to be done over time.

This list included people whom resided some distance away and required a
bit of travelling or whom I owed more than I could pay back in a short
period

3) Amends I would never be able to make.

This list included people who had died or with whom I no longer had
contact with.


Good luck with your list.

[REZ]

Don't forget to put your self on the list. I did a lot of harm to my self that I am still trying to forgive myself about. Good luck.

[Gmoney]

"We did many people great harm, but most of all we harmed ourselves." - Basic Text, page 13

For me, the 8th Step looked easy at first, but it really wasn't. In the previous 7 steps, I got honest about my thoughts, my ideas and why I did the things I did...but this step required me to employ a deeper honesty about my interactions with other people. Truly understanding what harm is and eliminating my justfications and rationalizations took some effort, and because I wasn't confident or sure, I ended up making a list that was ridiculously long. Once I shared my list with my sponsor (and why those people were on it) he suggested that seperate actual harm from imagined harm and to make sure I added myself to the list. Although the 8th Step is a practice of willingness, it also opens the door to forgiveness. By forgiving myself, I began the process of becoming willing to make amends. Another key was for me to do the 8th Step as if there was no 9th Step.