re-committing.

[namommy]

You all know I have been gone for a while. I took a "break" from NA for a while.

Well, I felt the pain of that decision, and have re-committed to the program. I am going to meetings again, I have a sponsor and a home group again. I am also trying to come back on SR once in a while as well.

If you think you can get away for long without feeling some unmanagability, think again. Once you've gotten a taste of recovery, it's hard to live otherwise.

I just thank God I didn't use before I came back.

[daydream]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((namommy)))))))))))))))))) )))))))
I did the same thing back in the fall. I used to pride myself on not getting caught up in the group negativity where I attended meetings, but after several years of group bs combined with depression and deep emotional pain over a bad breakup, I finally caved in and gave up. I left meetings, planning just to take a 2-3 week break. Then I found that I had so much more peace without being around all the group chaos. I just stayed home. It felt great to stay home in evenings, didn't have to leave the house except when i wanted to. Only showered or changed clothes if I had to go somewhere like to an appointment. Slept 12 hours a day and lay on the couch watching television the rest of the time. Total relaxation. But then I started feeling the loneliness and felt my spirituality slipping. I wasn't miserable, but I knew full well from past experience where I would end up if I continued on that path. I had tried it before and failed repeatedly. For awhile I remained defiant, knowing full well that I was still powerless over my addiction and that I would likely use again if I didn't get my butt in gear. And I knew I was gambling with my life. But finally I forced myself back into action. After about 4 months, I got a new sponsor, very much needed, and returned to meetings. I had almost gone down that familiar road, but thank God this time I made it back in time and didn't have to use. I've been back in meetings for 2 months. It wasn't until i got back and started participating in life again that I could see just how self-destructive the isolation had become. For the time being I am staying out of all the group bs for the time being. Trying to get a solid foundation before I get involved in group conscience again. So far I'm still not thrilled to be in meetings, but I'm commited to 3 per week and I'm overjoyed to be working with this new sponsor. Just keep it simple namommy. Hang in there. Love ya!

[Gmoney]

Welcome back. We saved your seat for you!! (((HUGS)))

[Chance]

It's good to see ya back that is for sure I know that I have missed having you and your ESH around here. This is Vic AKA luckyv2 here. Hope that we see more of you here...Thanks for the message of recovery!

With Love and Respect

Vic

[namommy]

I was wondering why :"Chance" had "Lucky" as his signature. Good to see you too Vic.

Thanks for saving me a seat Garry.

Daydream. Thanks for the inspiration. It always helps when you know you are not the only one who has done something. That someone else can relate.

I didn't Isolate from the whole world, just the NA world. I missed the spiritual aspects of my recovery. The only way I seem to stay spiritually grounded is to remain grounded in my recovery program.

I've committed myself to 2 meetings a week, and an extra or 2 here and there as I can. I am working full time, I have an hour and a half commute to work, and the same home. So after working 9 hours or more, then 3 hours of commuting, I am so tired. I found a weeknight meeting that I can walk to from the train station and it is early enough in the evening that I can still go to bed early. The other is a Sunday afternoon meeting. Again I get done early enough that I can get home early enough to get ready for Monday morning and get to bed early.

I still have boyscouts and cub scouts, and my husband is disabled so I am picking up that slack, so I am busy. That's my problem. Sometimes so busy I forget to keep contact with the God of my understanding.

I'll be around.

[abtchonamission]

MOMMMMEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You're back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In case you didn't know...I missed you.

[REZ]

Welcome back. Keep coming back. It works if you work it,etc.

[namommy]

Thanks Btch. I missed you too.

Thanks for the welcome back Rez.

[dalin]

we truly missed you homegirl!!!!!!!!!!
welcome back